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About The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current | View Entire Issue (March 2, 1998)
onday • March 2, 1998 The Battalion ERSPECTIVES no eta insert joing spacey people ponder the possibility of life on Mars, America gets space crazy i brow ■ andder: I year* asecaisl adu« i otheitl -fo rai^’ ONE STAR LOWDOWN .arotv.t.Ls. „u . • - - • - •• -■ - ' • Controversy over how disperse Texas Jobacco money divides Dave Johnston columnist Ihe Texas to- xibii baccoset- ^ tlementis e 6 largest court ' e lenient in the & :oryofthe ited States. The nicotine- 6;hers agreed to /.5d $15 billion of ir hard-earned lof.g money to • Beat state. rvu'vVhen politi- is see dollar signs, they get excited, en they get excited, they get careless, he past few months have given unusu- ca isight into the state’s public servants. almost immediately, a great public it >ate began over distribution of the ney. Texas Attorney General Dan rales, who was responsible for the suit linst the tobacco industry, felt it was a to him to distribute the cash (minus i n£ ne legal fees) as he saw fit. The state igi ess swiftly ended his spending s tree, but decisions still have to be made. Ot Since this suit was brought on behalf he taxpayers of the state, perhaps they Juld all benefit from the proceeds. If took the entire settlement and sub- ■ 1 cted the lawyers’ chunk of the money a ?vvh opping $2.3 billion which deserves ttser inspection later), that leaves $12.7 bn dollars. |i this money was evenly distributed ong all Texas citizens, each Texan mid receive a check for $678 and ange. If Texans generously let the state p the change, the public coffers mid still gain over a million dollars. Some might argue this plan gives oney to an undeserving segment of the ipulation. It is the cigarette smokers at earned this cash for the state. This ( oney is intended to offset the huge niedical expenses incurred by long-term bacco users under state care. | So an alternate plan could involve of- . ring cigarette smokers their portion of e pot — with a few strings. Each tobac- i smoker in the state could get a letter fering a check for $2,700 if they agree never again set foot in a hospital or Actor’s office anywhere in the state, sy, if people are willing to play the lot- ry, they might accept such a generous fer from the folks in Austin. I he state seems to have no problem spending money, but more a violent dis cussion has centered around the legal fees related to the ruling. The attorneys responsible for this settlement were promised 15 percent of the proceeds, but no one expected to dish out $2.3 billion to the lawyers (as though the remaining $12.7 billion is suddenly too small an amount). A similar debate is going on in Flori da where lawyers are owed $2.8 billion of that state’s tobacco money. Fortu nately, our lawyers selflessly limited their cut to 15 percent instead of the 25 percent demanded by the greedy jurists in the Sunshine State. In Texas, Morales hired lawyers whose political leanings were similar to his own. In fact, many of the lawyers had contributed to Morales’ campaigns (of course, he’s not going to hire his arch-rivals). This leave state Republicans in a serious position. They must make sure good, conservative tobacco mon ey doesn’t line the pockets of evil, De mocratic lawyers. The lawyers’ portion is definitely hefty. If the money were divided evenly, each lawyer attached to the case will get about $35 million. This sum is intimi dating on its own, but imagine what these legal beagles could do if they pooled their resources. Assuming it costs $60 million to run for president, if the entire $2.3 billion were hidden in a bank, the money would provide enough cash to finance 10 presidential candidates every four years. The country has yet to recover from a single Ross Perot. If Perot bought large chunks of media air time, these guys could rent prime time for the whole month of November. Texas officials will be locked in arbi tration for some time over the final dis tribution of the tobacco settlement money, and the issue is complicated. Yet the original lawsuit is terribly dis turbing. The state has legalized tobacco and taxed its sale for years, but sudden ly the elite are seeking more money and blaming big tobacco for all sorts of griefs. Responsibility for widespread to bacco use and illness does not end with the growers and marketers. Dave Johnston is a senior mathematics major. Jennifer Jones columnist I t’s the year 2001, the start of the new millennium. NASA has launched a mission to Mars in search of alien life, the world has yet to experience the fiery Armageddon Nostradamus prophetized and Titanic is still number one at the box office. It’s the stuff science fiction is made of, right? Not anymore. Federal agencies currently are designing a labora tory to protect Earth from any alien microbes that might be con tained in samples a planned expedition to Mars might bring back. But what if these missions to Mars turn up noth ing? What if the samples contain nothing but space dust minus any cuddly alien life forms? What hap pens to all the American industries who have profited so heavily from supposed extraterrestrial life? After all, a substantial chunk of the entertain ment industry is centered around the possibility of alien life. Think Independence Day, Alien Resurrection, E. T. Think Spacehog and UFOFU. Think Marvin the Martian and Space Ghost. Think “Mork and Mindy,” “The X-files,” “A.L.F.” From Roswell to Men in Black, popular culture is obsessed with the possibility of aliens and govern ment conspiracy. If aliens fail to be discovered, will all of America’s fantasies about extraterrestrial life sud denly vanish? It is highly unlikely. Simply because a mission to Mars yields absolutely no evidence of aliens does not mean there is not life out there somewhere, right? At least that is what Hollywood and the rest of the enter tainment folks are banking on: American’s ability to believe in something or someone even in the face of glaring evidence. Think Gennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica Lewinsky. But then again, what if this planned space expe dition does turn up something? Think of the mar keting possibilities. Just as M&M’s is the “official” candy of the new millennium, Mars Bars will no doubt become the official candy of alien microbes. And why stop there? When it comes to food, we will all be snack ing on Microbe Munchies while watching the final episode of “The X-files” where Mulder prances through FBI headquarters chanting “I told you so” to all of the non-believers. In an age of remakes and sequel-happy producers, old favorites like “My Favorite Martian” and “Out of This World” will likely make reappearances on our television sets. Movies will of course get a huge boost from the discovery of life on another planet. Titanic, the movie that grossed over a zillion dollars, finally will be pushed out of the number-one slot by Mars Attacks II, this time featuring a dismal portrayal of a scary, alien virus attacking Earth’s people and destroying the world. Nothing like the fear of annihilation to get peo ple pouring into the box office. Much like the Barney craze a few years ago, there is no question that children’s merchandisers will run with the newest fad. From clothing to videos, no market will be left untapped. Martians will be everywhere, from velcro sneak ers to plastic lunch boxes. Fake alien antennas made out of headbands, pipe cleaners and glitter-covered foam balls will experience a resurgence in populari ty and make snazzy party favors at children’s birth day parties. Remember, just because a microbe is not as warm and fuzzy as, say, an Ewok does not mean merchandisers can’t turn a buck. Regardless of what NASA finds in it expeditions to Mars, one thing is certain: America will find a way to profit. And that’s OK. Capitalism lives on. Bring on the lit tle green men. Or not. Either way, we’re ready for them. Jennifer Jones is a senior psychology major. STUDENT LIFE . /',-j ' rC .'C :.'' "liyil-' Vu'.;-? .. iO ‘ h i ' " ■ ' Aggie ring valued more than degrees Len Callaway columnist E ach year new students come toA&M and are indoctrinated as Aggies. Freshmen and transfers alike are al lowed to call them selves Aggies, partic ipate in yells, wear Texas A&M T-shirts and a whole host of other traditions asso ciated with being a student at A&M. The Aggie ring policy for undergraduates requires one to have a minimum of 95 hours of credit, 60 of which must be earned “in residency” at A&M before one can be per mitted to order their class ring. However, one is permitted by the powers at Heaton Hall to transfer into A&M with as few as 36 hours remaining towards their degree. All 36 hours must then be taken at A&M, however, three years at Po Dunk Ju nior College and two 18-hour semesters in Aggieland will net one an Aggie degree and subsequently an Aggie ring. Does this seem odd to anyone else? Our administration has once again gone in so many different directions at once that no one really knows what is going on around here. One of our entities is jaded against the very people it will soon repre sent and one is biased towards those that have never attended school here. The policies of Heaton Hall and the As sociation of Former Students stand in di rect conflict with one another and both policies are in need of reevaluation. The old Aggie adage says “once an Ag gie, always an Aggie” not “once one has their ring one is always an Aggie, until such time as one no longer has their ring then they will cease being an Aggie until the ring is replaced.” Nor does the yell say “Farmers with rings fight, Farmers with rings fight, Farmers with rings, Farmers with rings, yeah, we’re alright.” As one traverses our campus it appears that no one shares the ring office’s open hostility toward A&M’s transfer students. Nary a T-shirt can be seen with a slogan such as “ Highway 6 runs both ways, transfers go back from whence ye came.” However, the ring office seems to feel Aggies are not trustworthy enough to be is sued a ring until certain criteria are met. Due to the tradition and honor associated with the Aggie ring, the policy is under standable, but, none the less inappropriate. A quick phone call to the ring office will reveal that some Aggies used to quit school upon the receipt of their rings and then use the rings for the purpose of jobs. No sensible Aggie would ever invest the time necessary to earn 95 hours of credit toward their Aggie degree, get their ring and say adios. However, this is exactly what some of our compatriots have done and now rea sonable, dedicated and ethical Aggies are paying the price. Associate Executive Director for Alumni Programs at the Association of Former Students, Porter Garner, has gone on record recently by saying the policy is meant to “preserve the integrity of the Aggie ring.” Mr. Garner is right, the integrity of the Aggie ring does need to be protected and preserved but so does the Aggie degree. Just in case someone has missed the point, the administration has allowed Heaton Hall and the admissions office to de-value the Aggie degree to the point that it now only takes a minimum of 36 hours to earn the right to graduate from Texas A&M. There is an obvious and more appro priate alternative available to both entities to remedy this paradox while preserving both sets of interests. Switch the mandates, that’s right, 60 residency hours to earn a degree and 36 for the ring. This way everyone has the ability to earn the privilege of wearing their Aggie ring while still a currently- enrolled student. Plus, students are required to spend more time in residency at A&M to earn their degree, thereby increasing the likeli hood that each student graduating from A&M has had adequate exposure to the A&M curriculum. Whatever the solution might be, it’s a bit ridiculous to protect one’s symbol more than one’s self. After all, what will an entities symbol be worth if the in tegrity of the entity is continually at risk for compromise. Len Callaway is ajunior journalism major. MAIL CALL Truth should be basis for opinions, not parties In response to Donny Ferguson’s Feb. 26 column: Is there any sort of requirement that writers in The Battalion re search their topics before spouting uneducated propaganda on the pages of our newspaper? The most recent edition of Ferguson’s ultra- right-wing drivel leads me to believe that there is no such regulation. First of all, I want to declare I am a conservative, and I am not a supporter of the Clinton administration. But my very own conservative ideals are made to look foolish by Fergu son’s uneducated ramblings. The major point Ferguson seems to ignore is Clinton was not involved with the talks in which U.N. Secretary General Kofi Annan “forged another ‘diplomatic solution.’” I am, quite possibly, the strongest supporter of military strikes against Iraq, however, I also understand the facts: mili tary strikes do not represent “the will of the global commu nity,” as much as I would like that to be the case. Sixty per cent of the U.N. Security Council is opposed to this course of action, albeit for self ish reasons involving trade agreements. I have come to the conclusion military action is the only effective solution. Ferguson may agree with this, but he should not attempt to delude his readers into believ ing this is the international consensus. As for the comments about what a “real president” would do ... last time I checked, the Grenada operation and the Persian Gulf War were both undertaken for reasons some what less romantic than im proving “the prospects for peace... in the region.” I wouldn’t expect Ferguson to understand this, though; if “a high-ranking Republican official” was quoted as saying the goal of the United States was to make the world a bet ter place, then (in the polisci- major-Congressional-aide- start-up-kit mentality) that’s the way it really must be. For a long time, I have been annoyed by the liberal lean ings of The Battalion. But now — liberal or conserva tive — I am tired of seeing partisan politics espoused in the filth which often occu pies the space beneath Fer guson’s picture. So please — learn enough about the is sues to form an opinion in dependent of your political ideology, and... tell the truth. Christopher Mewitt Class of’01 The Battalion encourages letters to the editor. Letters must be 300 words or less and include the author’s name, class, and phone number. The opinion editor reserves the right to edit letters for length, style, and ac curacy. Letters may be submitted in per son at 013 Reed McDonald with a valid student ID. Letters may also be mailed to: The Battalion - Mail Call 013 Reed McDonald Texas A&M University College Station, TX 77843-1111