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About The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current | View Entire Issue (Jan. 11, 1955)
Page 2 THE BATTALION Tuesday, January 11, 1955 GET THE MOST FOR TEXTBOOKS! It’s just good business on your part to bring your books to . . . SHAFFER’S LAST AND GET THE MOST! — WE BUY ALL BOOKS — Shaffer’s Book Store — North Gate On Campus with MaxShuIman (Author of "Barefoot Boy With Cheek," etc.) A GUIDE FOR THE DATELESS With the cost of dating- rising higher and higher (seems the only pleasure that costs the same these days is Philip Morris), it is no wonder that so many of us men are turning to discus throwing. Naturally, we would prefer nuzzling warm coeds to flinging cold disci, but who’s got that kind of money? Prices being what they are, the average man today has a simple choice: dating or eating. Unless the average man happens to be Finster Sigafoos. Let me tell you how Finster Sigafoos, a man no smarter, no richer, than you or I, solved his dating problem. Finster came to college with the normal ambition of any average man: he wanted to find the prettiest coed on campus and make her his. He looked long and carefully, and at last he found her — a tall job named Kretohma Inskip, with hair like beaten gold. He asked her* for a date. She accepted. He appeared at her sorority house that night, smiling, eager, and carrying a bou quet of modestly priced flowers. “Now then,” said Kretchma, tossing the sleazy flora to a pledge, “where are we going tonight?” Finster was a man short on cash, but long on ideas. He had prepared sevei'al attractive plans for this evening. “Ho\# would you like to go but to the Ag campus and see the milking machine?” he asked. “Ick,” she replied. “Well then, how about running over to the dental school to fool with the drills ?” “Bah,” she replied. “Well, what would you like to do?” he asked. “Come,” said she, “to a funny little place I know just outside of town.” And away they went. The place was Millionaires Roost, a simple country inn made of solid ivory. It was filled with beautiful ladies in backless gowns, handsome men in dickeys. Waiters scurried about bear ing costly eats on flaming swords. Original Rembrandts adorned the walls. Philip Morris trays adorned the cigarette girls. Chained to each table was a gypsy violinist. Finster and Kretchma were seated. “I,” said Kretchma to the waiter, “will start with shrimps remoulade. Then I will have lobster and capon in madeira sauce with asparagus spears. For dessert I will have loads of out-of-season fruit.” “And you, Sir?” said the waiter to Finster. “Just bring me a pack of Philip Morris,” replied Finster, “for if ever a man needed the soothing, steadying, beneficent aromas of mild vintage tobaccos, it is me now.” So, smoking the best of all possible cigarettes, Finster watched Kretchma ingest her meal and calculated that every time her fetching young adam’s apple rose and fell, he was out another 97C Then he took her home. It was while saying goodnight that Finster got his brilliant idea. “Listen !” he cried excitedly. “I just had a wonderful notion. Next time we go out, let’s go Dutch treat!” By way of reply, Kretchma slashed him across the face with her house mother and stormed into the house. “Well, the heck with her,” said Finster to himself. “She is just a gold digger and I am well rid of her. I am sure there are many girls just as beautiful as Kretchma who will under stand the justice of my position. For after all, girls get as much money from home as men, so what could be more fair than sharing expenses on a date?” With good heart and high hopes, Finster began a search for a girl who would appi*eciate the equity of Dutch treat, and you will be pleased to hear that he soon found one. Today Finster goes everywhere and shares expenses fifty-fifty with Mary Alice Hematoma, a lovely three legged girl with sideburns. ©Max Sliulman, l!>-33 This column is brought to you for your enjoyment by the makers of PHILIP MORRIS. And speaking of enjoyment, try a pack today* Th e Battalion The Editorial Policy of The Battalion Represents the Views of the Student Editors The Battalion, newspaper of the Agricultural and Mechanical College of Texas and the City of College Station, is published by stu dents four times a week during the regular school year. During the summer terms The Battalion is published twice a week, and during examination and vacation periods, once a week. Days of publication are Tuesday through Friday for the regular school year, Tuesday and Thursday .during the summer terms, and Thursday during examination and vacation periods. The Battalion is not published on the Wednesday immediately preceding Easter or Thanksgiving. Subscription rates are $3.50 per semester, $G.OO per school year, $7.00 per full year, oi' $1.00 pei’ month. Advertising rates furnished on request. Entered as second-class matter at Post Office at College Station, Texas under the Act of Con gress of March 3, 1870. Member of The Associated Press Represented nationally by National Advertising Services, Inc., at New York City, Chicago, Los Angeles, and San Fran cisco. The Associated Press is entitled exclusively to the use for republi cation of all news dispatches credited to it or not otherwise credited in the paper and local news of spontaneous origin published herein. Rights of republication of all othei matter herein ai’e also reserved. News contributions may be made by telephone (4-5444 or 4-7604) or at the editorial office room, 202 Goodwin Hall. Classified ads may be placed by telephone (4-5324) or at the Student Publication Office, Room 207 Goodwin Hall. BOB BORISKIE, HARRI BAKER Co-Editors Jon Kinslow Managing Editor . Jei’ry Wizig Sports Editor Don Shepai’d, Bill Fullei’ton News Editors j Ralph Cole —City Editor , Ronnie Greathouse Spozts Writer ! Jim Neighbors, Welton Jones, Paul Savage Reporters j Mrs, Jo Ann Cocanougher Women’s Editor • Legislature (Continued from Page 1) The temporary commission’s second recommendation has to do with the appropriation formula mentioned eai'lier. They will rec ommend that the formula be changed so that the appropriation is based on the number of credit hours for each student by pro gram. That is, that a larger amount per student credit hour be given for students enrolled in the tech nical courses that cost more to teach. For example, a history course z-equires only a teacher, textbook, classroom, and maybe a map, but aeronautical engineering or animal husbandry require much more to be taught effectively. It is possible that the appro priations this session will be made by this new formula instead of the old one described above. If the legislature approves this new for mula recommendation and tells the commission to put it into ef fect before they make the appro priations, they may use the new formula. Harrington calls the formation of the committee and the new ap propriation formula “the first con structive recommendation for high er education to be made in Texas in a long time.” The state board of education is going to ask the Legislature to pj-ovide for a continuous agricul tural census to be used in giving Gilmei’-Aiken money to secondary schools, and A&M may be charged with this. The board of education allots the funds provided for in the Gil- mer-Aiken law to counties on a basis of agricultural statistics. Their job would be made easier if a continuous survey of these sta tistics was made, and A&M is the logical agency to make the sur vey. The A&M System will ask the Legislature for construction appro priations for buildings on some of the agricultural experiment sta tions, and for permission to sell two small tracts of land. The two sales will be four acres of the Denton agricultural station to the Santa Fe railroad for a new cut-off, and five acres from the Angelina county agi’icultural ex periment station to the local school district. The amount of land seems too small for the legislature to bother with, but legally, the system boai'd of directors cannot transfer land titles without the permission of the legislature. The time when any of these rec ommendations and proposals will be brought up in the Legislature is not yet known. Although the Leg islature convened today, it prob ably will not actually start work until after the governor’s inaug- uration next Tuesday. And there may be other items of interest to A&M brought zip by the legislators—as in 1953, when a state senator proposed a resolu tion that A&M be made a coeduca tional college. “I doubt that that will happen in this session,” Harrington said, “but it came as a complete sur prise to me the last time.” Dorothy Staehs Elected President Mrs. Dorothy Staehs is the pres ident of the Civil Engineering- Wives’ club. She was elected at the club’s last meeting. Other- officers elected are Mrs. Mary Lou Hughes, vice-president; Mrs. Juanita Bain, secretary; Mrs. Vicky Ratliff, treasurer; Mrs. Joan Miller, reporter; and Mrs. Maria Garza, parliamentarian. Hostesses for the meeting were Mesdames Peggy Graw, Rozelle Jennings and Iris Elliott. Cookies, ice cream and coffee were served as refreshments. WhaVs Cooking TUESDAY 7:30—Agronomy society. Agron omy building, election of officers. Weather club, Old Science build ing, color movies: Warm Fronts, Cold Fronts, Occluded Fronts. Camera committee, MSC, regu lar meeting. Games, game z*oom MSC, organi zational meeting of bridge team to z’epresent A&M at the National In tercollegiate Bridge Tournament. CASH!! For your Analtic Geometry and Technical Descriptive Geometry Books. LOU Cadet Slouch by Earle LOOK. I FAADi Pm SlVCKi COT^J ■ wp/so EVER TOM .-DICK AM' SIMTP CAKi COT JM TU' in. TT5 mow! c it (OUT e>ihJ\Pt CAM' r IA GUV GL:E-£ P TM&O l A QUIX? — SlLOUC 14, SfclUV OOKiT VOU TTUM*. TM' ’TRUE tools** is A sam CLUB? r— \r W' y #$1 TU' T.rCs AlM'T MOTMIM’BUJ Angies TUVIM’TA ACT LJhOA TUEV AdkPTT * SI DELS •TWAT . TMAR’Ai PROPS )M TP TPS SiKAP, IS'VO* GOMkiA MIX WITH profs! ip VO' WERH ALT ACCie: VO' COULD COS' PROPS OP MiXlW* VJlF E.M TM/XTGCASEL I PES l C MS ! i A? U*T ‘SAC RE B Pi C i M' LAV RIOMT TU CUSS PROPS, TVfTs OR mo s f mow* j AM AA6IE WAS TU&T TU' JVT SUIT WAS j tSETTSLR, UDOKjUlTWMJ] TM' ACC IE. SUIT/ ) Whai young people are doing at General Electric Young manufacturing expert pioneers in automation at General Electric In 1964, our greatest shortage may be work ing people. This country’s demand for elec trical goods will be 100% greater than it is today. But there will he only 11% more workmen. How can production per man he boosted enough to close the gap? For one answer, 31-year-old R H. Alspach, Manager of Manufacturing Development at G.E., is exploring automation. Automation: Continuous Automatic Production Automation is a way of manufacturing based on the continuous-flow concept. Products will be made, inspected, assembled, tested, and packaged by a series of integrated ma chines in one uninterrupted flow. As industry evolves toward greater automation, more workmen will become, skilled machine spe cialists or maintenance experts able to con trol complete systems. Phil Alspach and the men under him now draft layouts for automatic systems, tackle the engineering problems involved, design automation equipment, and even build some. 23,000 College Graduates at G.E. This is a big and important job. Alspach was readied for it in a careful, step-by-step pro gram of development. Like Alspach, each of G.E.’s 23,000 college-graduate employees is given his chance to grow, to find the work he does best, and to realize his full potential. For General Electric has long believed this: When fresh young minds are given freedom to make progress, everybody benefits —the individual, the company, and the country. P O G O By Walt Kelly YOU NOTICS MV PATigMT l<& €>TiUU GffOAMN' F£OM THE OFYO' r'—a HOM6MAP& ^OOG ) POUGHNUT5. ooe L- L* T 006" AIN'T NO eSOAN' IT^ A $QPT, HICCUP—WHY ie you TOOK TO 06P? Fovr HAW £e've«air« / poee YOU THINK A HlPPOCmiCALGATH MSAN6 AfQTH/Mpf U6HEAl-Ef?'TyP££ 6OTTO0& N£A£ OUC LCVEP OME5- ,f ' a CO YOU POP A MINUTE SOO-P06E THAT THIS NOBte YOUTH WOUHP EE L.EPT ALONE ON HI6 0EP OP PAIN? AfOf I AIN'T PJPOUP.'116 IpyAlflF HE'6 eiCK'" j 16 SICkL dots/ I PIN'T KNOW YOU WA6 A BONA ; „ FIOB WiPPO' \QA CPITICAL y EUT U0N(5 A6 YOU .16 BOTH AT PEATW f 6 POOl? I PONT FI6eE.I? I OU6HT TO WA6TE NONE OP THI6 BRUNaWICK 6TBWOH l CORPaBB. 3 V