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About The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current | View Entire Issue (Sept. 15, 1988)
Page 2/The Battalion/Thursday, September 15, 1988 Opinion Havejnercy A&M! No more fees, please. Earlier this week, just out of curiosity, I was looking at my fee slip. According to that slip, it is cost ing me (my par ents, actually) about $1,000 to at tend Texas A&M this semester. That figure even includes a semes- Dean Sueltenfuss ter-long stay in the luxurious Hart Hall, one of the most prestigious and sought- after residence halls on campus. About a third of the $1,000 went for my room in Hart Hall, while another third of it was for tuition. The final third was for various fees. While I havp no abhorrence of fees in general, I do occasionally like to know what they are for and why I am paying them. One fee that I found particularly baf fling was the general use fee of $96. self. ‘General use of what?” I asked my- Whatever it is, I’d like to quit using it so I can get my $96 back. I would assume that the general use fee has something to do with the use of classrooms, but $96 seems a little steep to me — I mean, have you been in tbe Academic Building lately? The rooms smell like stale beer and they look as if they’ve been inhabited by psychotic tree sloths for at least a year. Is this the deco rum that is costing me $96 per semes ter? If it is, I have some friends who 04006101 could render all the class rooms on campus to a similar state for a fraction of the cost — and they could have a pretty good time in the process. The health center fee of $15 is an other fee that I disagree with. Not only is it unfair, it’s down right discrimina tory against healthy people. I don’t want to make myself out as a braggart, but I have never — not once — had to set foot in the health center. Furthermore, if I’m in need of medical attention I don’t mind paying for it. But I DO mind pay ing for the medical attention rendered to the idiot who drank too much beer, got sick, and spent three days in the health center attempting to recover from his stupidity. One of the less illegitimate fees is the student center complex fee of $20. I must admit that I do spend quite a bit of time in the MSC. I get my mail there. I occasionally buy books there. I play vi deo games there. Every once in a while I even eat there. I pay for all of these things individually, though, so I’m reallv not sure what the additional $20 per semester is all about. The only other thing that I do at the MSC is ocassionally sit down and read a newspaper. Having determined that be ing able to sit down and read a paper in the MSC is not worth $20 to me, I would like to submit a formal request to the ad ministrators of A&M to give me my money back. I’ll read my newspapers outside from now on. Really — I don’t mind. I have to admit that the student cen ter complex fee appears rather tame when contrasted against the student services fee of $67. I just can’t seem to figure out what services I’m receiving from Texas A&M that I haven’t already paid for. Obviously, it wouldn’t be any thing having to do with academics — all of that stuff would have been covered by the tuition that I (my parents) paid. In fact, the only services I can think of that wouldn’t have been covered by at least one of the other fees are things such as keeping the hedges trimmed, _ imMes AACCP>U^r- .../‘MP’ I LEfrRNEP AU- AKCUT GEOGRAPHY WrWT HERE THE USA-. Jessica’s back & bigger than ever I don’t know why anyone was concerned about the TV writers strike. Even with out their creative efforts, there is so much that is worthwhile on television. For example, last night I was flipping through Mike Royko my cable channels, looking for a wres tling match, when suddenly I was face to face with Jessica Hahn. I was surprised to see her because I thought she had used up her fame allot ment and had passed on to wherever transient celebrities go —the People magazine graveyard. But there she was, being interviewed by Larry King, so I decided to stick around and see what she’s been up to. Because I tuned in late, and missed the introduction, I didn’t know why she was being interviewed. And at that moment, she was dis cussing her breasts. She said that as a teen, she had been plump. So she dieted and lost 40 pounds. But this left her with unusual proportions. She said her breasts drooped almost to her knees. I thought that King would surely ask her about the difficulty of buying suita ble undergarments. But they went on to discuss her body. She had gone to a California body shop — the kind for people, not cars — and had her body rebuilt. New nose, teeth and anything that was hanging low. Then it became clear why they were talking about such highly personal mat ters. I mean, if I had breasts or anything else that hung down to my knees. I would not go on the Larry King show and talk about it. But it turned out that Ms. Hahn is displaying her rebuilt body in Playboy magazine. As you may recall, last year she displayed her unaltered body. So we will have a chance to compare the old and rebuilt bodies and marvel at the wonders of modern science. , I was about to switch to the public broadcasting channel, for their nightly installment on the sex life of insects, when King said he was going to take calls from the live audience. Sensing the potential for conflict, I stayed tuned and was right. The first caller was a Southern lady who didn’t care for Hahn’s morals one bit. She demanded to know how Ms. Hahn could be a good Christian and flaunt her body so shamelessly. I didn’t take notes, but Ms. Hahn said she thought the good Lord, in his infi nite wisdom, had given her this oppor tunity, so she took it, and still consid ered herself a good girl. The caller didn’t agree. She thought the good Lord would disapprove of Ms. Hahn’s conduct, and that she was a bad girl. Although I’m not a theologian, de bates of this kind fascinate me. But it seems to me that Ms. Hahn was proba bly right. If the Lord didn’t want Ms. Hahn posing for Playboy, He could have prevented it. All He’d have to do is make her body grow yak fur. Then, to the amazement of King, Ms. Hahn and me, a call came from Hugh Hefner’s fiance, a young lady named Kimberly Conrad. I don’t believe that’s her real name. My guess is that she was borr Thelma Fugelblatt, but Hef doesn’t carry on with Thelmas. Anyway, Kimberly and Jessica are pals, since Jessica lives in the Hefner playhouse, and they told each other what beautiful people and wonderful human beings they were. It brought a The Battalion (USPS 045 360) Member of Texas Press Association Southwest Journalism Conference The Battalion Editorial Board Lydia Berzsenyi, Editor Becky Weisenfels, Managing Editor Anthony Wilson, Opinion Page Editor Richard Williams, City Editor D AJensen. Denise Thompson, News Editors Hal Hammons, Sports Editor Jay Janner, Art Director Leslie Guy, Entertainment Editor Editorial Policy I'hc Biiltulion is a non-profit, self-supporting newspa- per operated as a comnuinin service to Texas A&M and Brvan-College Station. Opinions expressed in The Ihuuilion are those of the editorial board or the author, and do not necessarily rep resent the opinions of Texas A&M administrators, fac- ultv or the Board of Regents. Ihe lintlulion also serves its a laboratory newspaper for students in reporting, editing and photographv classes within the Department of Journalism. The Bultuhon is published Monday through Friday during T exas A&M regular semesters, except for holidax and examination periods. Mail subscriptions are .SI7.44 pet semester. S3T.62 per school tear and S.‘5(i.44 per full vear. Advertising rales f urnished on request. Out address: 77ie li;ilt.ilion, 230 Reed McDonald. Texas A&M L'nivcrsitx. College Station. T\ 7784.3-1111. Second class postage paid at College Station. TX 77843. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to The IhtlLil ian. 216 Reed McDonald, fexas A&M l niversitv. Col lege Station TX 77843-4 111. BLOOM COUNTY keeping the grass cut, and keeping all those dumb squirrels fed. Another fee that I found particularh intriguing was the computer access fee of $48. Why should I pay almost $100 per year so that some engineering stu dent can •spend all of his time writing programs on a university-owned com puter? It's bad enough that we all have to pay for the small number of individu als who choose to use these computers. The worst part of this situation, how ever, is that a lot of the students who use the computers don’t even employ them for legitimate purposes. Some students use these computers to do such things as to communicate with other students at A&M or even to communicate with peo ple in other cities or countries. And do you know who picks up the tab for these little improprieties? \Ve all do — at about $50 apiece. If these fees don’t strike you as being very impressive sums of money, just multiply them by the 40,000 students who are attending Texas A&M. A fee of just $10 per student generates $400,000 of revenue — an impressive sum in deed. all of these fees is that the baa soiling behind them is flawed. 1:. 11 cases the student both in general:■ ing used to provide funding forserB that benefit onl\ a select groupo:ML e vei dents at A&M. In other cases,re Strauss- that are obtained primalilv In their in student both are being spent onv are- 4 < >i facilit irx 11 in i. w I nlc IHTH'liitiii. s students at A&M, the majority of students here. What it boils down to is (his , i i hB he ( maynotbede S i,« xas dreams news <)( <MCer dents of l exas \&.M should havtT eIlturt > t>l a x.i\ leg.udmg vn li.it iheir nuii^Bsi.ibl used for. We need to Ik* morei changi letting the administration knovt entreprt want, and the administration lit a £ ernenl be more responsive to our demandi are paving a lot of monev to attei university and many of us don’ii where all of that money is going.lt it’s about time that we found out. After all, would money being used demit situation at J sports car for a pi to improve it \&M, or to bm go I guess what I’m trying to say about ■A st< Be B. hearing Bis Texas din wa: charges tudt* at forman meeting Doan Sueltenfuss is a junior] inltituti lism mu jar unci columnist /orTy tulon talion. ffl 1 >u gent me ospeettve layer.-' Mail Call Laverne DeFazio for Miss America EDITOR: I read Becky Weisenfels’editorial on Monday. and 1 little. I’m used it) Miss America hashing around this time of v think the managing editor has slighted the wrong pci son. Sh Miss America as a bimbo? If I remember correctly the Asstuiated Press wire stor\ c< C at i Ison is an accomplished classical violinist who attends St at about Gretchen’s future goals of attending Harvard l.aw St h successful business executive? Yes. 1 see a detinue pattern of developing. I suggest while the editor was sitting on her couch, watchi ild n’t help hut sit \ ear, but this lira rtravs theti tl\. Grei 1. And w the tube I preparing for the Miss America pageant. Cretchen was brushing up for her LSAT. Perhaps Ms. Weisenfels doesn’t feel that Cretchen i intellect, wit, and other qualities, including beauty — is her goal of corporate executive? Or may lie our beloved is just a tinge jealous of the newly crowned Miss Amet it and brains? While 1 neither support nor denounce the pageant, reul bimbo here? pr ticim ?r vi Ban 11 of her gifts nencan wav to 'ion managing nbination ot b a phot< fat ulty copy Hs fr< m Kown lain, th< Un told ll marge- fif 111 ^ crossed Whe Wedne counse quest io tude” 1 of char Bmci Bve r di et j materi, the pei merlin instiuu tes." ;/ kit I) wit h m ! The Br. A. "W Stephen Pace ’91 Behind the times EDITOR: I have been a student at this fine university for four years and will gradu j this fall, hit he course of time , 1 have fallen pre\ to illness like any other ptr f colds and ihe flu. During this time of need. I have traveled to the A.P. Boult ! 1 fealtli C'.enter only to f ind it lacking the prompt, ef f it lent health care 1 had : expected. I found my hopes for efficiency dashed while I wailed in the “cattlesickpd they call y\ailing rooms to see a doctor. Admittedly, they have changed thesi/u the yvaiting room near the doctor’s offices, but still the basic fact remains—ii herd of ailing folks! Often, I have felt even worse leaving the Health C.enterq before I left. Before anyone suggests that I see a doctor in the Bitau-College Stationad don’t own any means of transport to get there and with the parking situation ! yvho’d want to lend me their car? In short, I find the excessive waits unacceptable and ask fora change: 1. Isolate those people who are contagious in isolation wait ing rooms. 2. Increase the medical staff and stagger the him Ii hour, i.e., not cveryod f rom noon to 1 p.m. (This university is notorious for shun ing down for lunch when students have important matters to attend.) 3. Use the $ 15 “health center fee" charged to everyone to oui advantage* ] help us stay well so we can learn! Brenna D. Burnham ’88 Letters to the editor should not exceed 300 words in length. The editorial staff resrnrs the right to edit Iritn and length, but will make even’ effort to maintain the author's intent. Each lettei must be sigiuilmidmuslis classification, address and telephone number of the writer. 'TyW* tear to my eye. Or maybe I’m devel oping a sty. Then Hefner himself came on the phone. He giggled. I’ve known him, on and off, mostly off, for about 25 years, and every time I've heard him talk, he giggles. I suppose that if I had led his life, I'd giggle, too. If I had any strength left. He, too, said that Jessica was a won derful human being. And she said he was a beautiful person. There was more, but I had to walk out of the room and pull my eiil together, I was so choked up. As the program ended, Larry 1 ! asked Jessica what she was goingif with the rest of her life. ShethoiM a moment, then said that she wasci to write a book. At least I think that’s whatshe®| plane went over just as she wasrespi ing, so I didn't hear her tooclearh So it’s possible that she said sM going to read one. Copyright 1988, Tribune Media Service. by Berke Breatli d/esvti fd.