The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current, September 12, 1997, Image 4

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

    CINEMARK THEATRES
d
1401 E. BYPASS 764-7592
y
THE PREMIERE SHOWCASE OF THE BRAZOS. VALLEY
LATE SHOWINGS FRIDAY AND SATURDAY FOR
ALL AHOWS AFTER 11 P.M.
MONDAY - THURSDAY NO SHOWINGS BEFORE 1 P.M.
SNEAK PREVIEW: KEVIN KLEIN IN 'IN AND OUT” AT 8:15
SAT. SEPT 13™ AND THEN STAY AND SEE "FACE OFF”
A SMILE LIKE YOURS(R)
11:20 1:40 4:10
AIR FORCE ONE(R) 11:00 1:50 4:40 7:00 9:45 12:20
CONTACT(PG)
11:00 2:10 5:20 8:30 11:40
COPLAND(R)
11:50 2:20 4:55 7:25 10:05 12:35
FACE/OFF(R)
No showing Saturday at 7:15 ONLY
G.l. JANE(R)
1:10 4:10 7:10 10:00 12:45
HERCULES/GEORGE OF THE JUNGLE(PG)
2 for 1 - Come as late as 10:20 Fri. & Sat to see bothl
GEORGE 12:20 4:20 8:20 12:20
HERCULES 2:20 6:20 10:20
HOODLUM(R)
12:00 3:00 5:00 8:00 11:05
LEAVE IT TO BEAVER(PG)
11:15 1:30 3:45
MEN IN BLACK(PG-13)12:30 3:00 5:30 7:55 10:10 12:15
MIMIC(R)
12:10 2:35 5:15 8:05 10:25 12:50
MONEY TALKS(R) 12:50 3:05 5:20 7:40 9:55 12:05
MY BEST FRIENDS WEDDING(PG-13) 11:50 4:40 9:45
NOTHING TO LOSE(R)12:35 3:00 5:25 7:50 10:15 12:25
PICTURE PERFECT(PG-13)
2:15 7:15 12:05
SPAWN(PG-13)
6:45 9:10 11:30
TODAY’S TIMES ONLY • FOUR DAY ADVANCE TICKET SALES
VISIT OUR WEB SITE - http://toww.cinemark.com
Hey, Education majors!
We’re having a party for you
September 16, 5:00-8:00p.m.
\5'7( Discount on purchases during this event
Sec our new leaeher & cd. major’s workroom
Free project demos
Free goodies to take home
Free f ood
Call for info at 846-8660
www.jacques-toys.com
JACQUES
Toys • Books • Educational Supplies
On Texas Avenue • one stoplight north of University Drive at Rosemary
USE IT WISELY!
'V4
V
m
Entergy Corporation is seeking students who are looking for a mind altering experience.
DON’T MISS ENTtRGY ON CAMPUS!
SEPTEMBER 16 G IT
OCTOBER 6, 7, 8, 20 & 21
For more information on Entergy Corporation and its mind blowing jobs, visit our web site:
www.careermosaic.com/cm/entergy
Entergy
EEO/AA/M/f/D/V.
WOLF PEN AMPHITHEATER
SATURDAY, SEPT. 13 th
LIVE MUSIC DRINKS, FOOD, AND FRIENDS
$4
20th BIRTHDAY
&
REUNION PARTY
Featuring:
Ruthie Foster
Latin Cheese Quartet
Voodudes
Sleeper
Pete and Friends
GATES OPEN AT 5 PM
L The Battalion
IFESTYLES
Friday • September 12,19 ^ay • Sep
Di, Mother Theresa may b
gone, but Marilyn is forever
I t is a dark
time for
the re
bellion. Two
of our most
sacred and
radiant fe
male role
models,
Princess Di
ana and
Mother
Theresa,
caught the
last train for
Chris
Martin
columnist
the coast this past week. With
every breath we take, every move
we make, every leaf we rake, we’ll
indeed be missing them.
As the world aches in the wake
of the wakes, I offer to the world
my own personal list of goddesses
to get us through this valley of the
shadow of death.
Barbara Eden was one of my
first heroes, but I honestly ad
mired her more as the evil, raven-
haired Jeannie about a million
times more —Who didn’t?
My one time Wonder Woman,
Lynda Carter, now only wonders
when her Clear Vision checks will
come in.
Then there’s Lady Elaine
Eairchild from Mr. Rogers Neigh
borhood, who lived in the neigh
borhood of make believe and
could turn the world upside down
with her “boomerang
toomerang.”
Unfortunately, I recently
learned she now heads up a mili
tant lesbian ninja death squad. I
think we all saw that one coming.
Of course I always get disap
proving looks when I confess loy
alty to my muse, Martha Stewart.
Martha even sent me an auto
graphed glossy.
“You have a serious fantasy
mother obsession disorder,” my
close friend always says. She’s just
jealous. Guess I better not show
her my autographed picture of
Vicki Lawrence from “Mama’s
Family,” either.
I still have Xena, who is a war
rior and a princess, much like Ma
Theresa and Princess Di cloistered
together like sausage into a tight
leather bustier. However, I don’t
think that this lifetime will ever
canonize anyone with a porno-
queen name like Lucy Lawless.
That’s the end of my hope rope.
My last drop of world-healing
metaphysical Kool-Aid.That is, un
til I happened to pick up Parade
magazine in last Sunday’s paper.
That’s when she first appeared
to me, gentle reader.
She embodies beauty,
strength, wit and charm, much
like that sassy Dixie Carter. She is
funny, intelligent, gentle, caring
and has one killer set of hemi
spheres inside her skull.
Her name is Marilyn vos Savant,
and according to the Guinness
Book ofWorld Records she is the
smartest living being to ever traipse
below the canopy of heaven.
With all her intelligence, intel
ligence that could easily over
throw all the governments of the
world, she has instead chosen to
humbly serve humankind
through the wisdom of her week
ly column, “Ask Marilyn” — a no
ble vocation, I must concur.
She’s every Spice Girl rolled
into one smarmy suit, with “girl
power” to spare. She’s no sex kit
ten — she’s a lioness. There’s only
one thing the Spice Girls have
that Marilyn doesn’t, and that’s a
major motion picture deal.
The time is nigh for Ask Mari
lyn: The Movie. The American
public demands cinematic cere
bral cereal to properly nourish
the collective cultural mind.
Look at the way audiences
gave a resounding “No!” to Juras
sic Park: The Lost World. Mothers
and fathers left Batman and
Robin in droves. Boys and girls all
across the land turned up their
noses to George of the Jungle Oh,
well, maybe Hollywood doesn’t .
deserve Marilyn just yet.
This means, of course, that
Marilyn will just have to crawl in
way into the living rooms of the
good people of America by way(
a TV movie! It’s a land where star
as faded as Markie Post, Judith
Light and Johnny Galecki can
shine bright for two precious
Sears-sponsored hours.
The movie will begin with
Marilyn’s parents, perhaps eve
at the moment when the
archangel visits Marilyn’s moth
er. We’ll see the trials andtribu
lations of the young genius, in
details unseen since Gary Cole
Se
he Blues Note
sge Station, is
p.m.
luthie Foster,
ion, is playing;
atchkey Kids,;
lid Fantasic, a i
etaway Kids,
iop at 9:30 p.r
She’s every Spice Girl
rolled into one smarmy
suit, with ‘girl power’ to
spare. She’s no sex
— she’s a lioness.
There’s one thing the
Spice Girls have that
Marilyn doesn’t, and
that’s a major motion
picture deal.
man’s portrayal ofThe Kid with
the 200 IQ.
The climax will come as Mar
lyn is rocketed into space tofu
the Mir space station, along will
special guest star Don Knotts.
With the debut of Marilyn’s
movie, the world will regain hi
for a bright tomorrow. When!.:
seems full of questions with lir
hope for answers, rest easy
knowing that you can always
“Ask Marilyn.”
atchkey Kids,
/larooned Recc
,’il Brian and th
iouston, is pla>
erry Morgan, a
he Blues Facto
iix Mile Bridge
’ath Ale House
wo Paces Wes
ig at Sweet Eu
Son
iugs
Chris Martin is a sen
journalism m,
Rev
Mimic
Starring Mira
[ Jeremy Nortl
1 Directed by G
I Toro
1 Rated R
*
[ Playing at Hoi
** 1/2
Better Ingredients,
Better Pizza.
he i
Customer Appreciation Day
Sunday, September 14th
Noon - 9:00 p.m.
One Large One Topping
$4.99
By AARor
Staff u
fall entomo
looked as gc
Sorvino, the
lew cinematic
, then butter!
ould become
lastime. Outsr
ood though, i
ists probably
cover of GC
safe for now.
Mimic open
Sorvino) as a l
iso happens ti
wful lot aboul
[ineering. In ai
id New York ol
s, she creates
pecies of bugs
udas breed. Is
oreshadowing
The insects
Mo the sewers
iosed to die wi
nonths. Howe
ic Park taught
lature will fine
urvive. Not or
lorified cockr
plus tax
No Limit!
Additional toppings extra.
Not valid with any other coupon.
Valid only at participating stores.
College Station
764-7272
1100 Harvey Rd.
Bryan
3414 East 29th St.
We accept credit cards
VISA
FIL
SEI
I4
(Down