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About The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current | View Entire Issue (Sept. 12, 1997)
CINEMARK THEATRES d 1401 E. BYPASS 764-7592 y THE PREMIERE SHOWCASE OF THE BRAZOS. VALLEY LATE SHOWINGS FRIDAY AND SATURDAY FOR ALL AHOWS AFTER 11 P.M. MONDAY - THURSDAY NO SHOWINGS BEFORE 1 P.M. SNEAK PREVIEW: KEVIN KLEIN IN 'IN AND OUT” AT 8:15 SAT. SEPT 13™ AND THEN STAY AND SEE "FACE OFF” A SMILE LIKE YOURS(R) 11:20 1:40 4:10 AIR FORCE ONE(R) 11:00 1:50 4:40 7:00 9:45 12:20 CONTACT(PG) 11:00 2:10 5:20 8:30 11:40 COPLAND(R) 11:50 2:20 4:55 7:25 10:05 12:35 FACE/OFF(R) No showing Saturday at 7:15 ONLY G.l. JANE(R) 1:10 4:10 7:10 10:00 12:45 HERCULES/GEORGE OF THE JUNGLE(PG) 2 for 1 - Come as late as 10:20 Fri. & Sat to see bothl GEORGE 12:20 4:20 8:20 12:20 HERCULES 2:20 6:20 10:20 HOODLUM(R) 12:00 3:00 5:00 8:00 11:05 LEAVE IT TO BEAVER(PG) 11:15 1:30 3:45 MEN IN BLACK(PG-13)12:30 3:00 5:30 7:55 10:10 12:15 MIMIC(R) 12:10 2:35 5:15 8:05 10:25 12:50 MONEY TALKS(R) 12:50 3:05 5:20 7:40 9:55 12:05 MY BEST FRIENDS WEDDING(PG-13) 11:50 4:40 9:45 NOTHING TO LOSE(R)12:35 3:00 5:25 7:50 10:15 12:25 PICTURE PERFECT(PG-13) 2:15 7:15 12:05 SPAWN(PG-13) 6:45 9:10 11:30 TODAY’S TIMES ONLY • FOUR DAY ADVANCE TICKET SALES VISIT OUR WEB SITE - http://toww.cinemark.com Hey, Education majors! We’re having a party for you September 16, 5:00-8:00p.m. \5'7( Discount on purchases during this event Sec our new leaeher & cd. major’s workroom Free project demos Free goodies to take home Free f ood Call for info at 846-8660 www.jacques-toys.com JACQUES Toys • Books • Educational Supplies On Texas Avenue • one stoplight north of University Drive at Rosemary USE IT WISELY! 'V4 V m Entergy Corporation is seeking students who are looking for a mind altering experience. DON’T MISS ENTtRGY ON CAMPUS! SEPTEMBER 16 G IT OCTOBER 6, 7, 8, 20 & 21 For more information on Entergy Corporation and its mind blowing jobs, visit our web site: www.careermosaic.com/cm/entergy Entergy EEO/AA/M/f/D/V. WOLF PEN AMPHITHEATER SATURDAY, SEPT. 13 th LIVE MUSIC DRINKS, FOOD, AND FRIENDS $4 20th BIRTHDAY & REUNION PARTY Featuring: Ruthie Foster Latin Cheese Quartet Voodudes Sleeper Pete and Friends GATES OPEN AT 5 PM L The Battalion IFESTYLES Friday • September 12,19 ^ay • Sep Di, Mother Theresa may b gone, but Marilyn is forever I t is a dark time for the re bellion. Two of our most sacred and radiant fe male role models, Princess Di ana and Mother Theresa, caught the last train for Chris Martin columnist the coast this past week. With every breath we take, every move we make, every leaf we rake, we’ll indeed be missing them. As the world aches in the wake of the wakes, I offer to the world my own personal list of goddesses to get us through this valley of the shadow of death. Barbara Eden was one of my first heroes, but I honestly ad mired her more as the evil, raven- haired Jeannie about a million times more —Who didn’t? My one time Wonder Woman, Lynda Carter, now only wonders when her Clear Vision checks will come in. Then there’s Lady Elaine Eairchild from Mr. Rogers Neigh borhood, who lived in the neigh borhood of make believe and could turn the world upside down with her “boomerang toomerang.” Unfortunately, I recently learned she now heads up a mili tant lesbian ninja death squad. I think we all saw that one coming. Of course I always get disap proving looks when I confess loy alty to my muse, Martha Stewart. Martha even sent me an auto graphed glossy. “You have a serious fantasy mother obsession disorder,” my close friend always says. She’s just jealous. Guess I better not show her my autographed picture of Vicki Lawrence from “Mama’s Family,” either. I still have Xena, who is a war rior and a princess, much like Ma Theresa and Princess Di cloistered together like sausage into a tight leather bustier. However, I don’t think that this lifetime will ever canonize anyone with a porno- queen name like Lucy Lawless. That’s the end of my hope rope. My last drop of world-healing metaphysical Kool-Aid.That is, un til I happened to pick up Parade magazine in last Sunday’s paper. That’s when she first appeared to me, gentle reader. She embodies beauty, strength, wit and charm, much like that sassy Dixie Carter. She is funny, intelligent, gentle, caring and has one killer set of hemi spheres inside her skull. Her name is Marilyn vos Savant, and according to the Guinness Book ofWorld Records she is the smartest living being to ever traipse below the canopy of heaven. With all her intelligence, intel ligence that could easily over throw all the governments of the world, she has instead chosen to humbly serve humankind through the wisdom of her week ly column, “Ask Marilyn” — a no ble vocation, I must concur. She’s every Spice Girl rolled into one smarmy suit, with “girl power” to spare. She’s no sex kit ten — she’s a lioness. There’s only one thing the Spice Girls have that Marilyn doesn’t, and that’s a major motion picture deal. The time is nigh for Ask Mari lyn: The Movie. The American public demands cinematic cere bral cereal to properly nourish the collective cultural mind. Look at the way audiences gave a resounding “No!” to Juras sic Park: The Lost World. Mothers and fathers left Batman and Robin in droves. Boys and girls all across the land turned up their noses to George of the Jungle Oh, well, maybe Hollywood doesn’t . deserve Marilyn just yet. This means, of course, that Marilyn will just have to crawl in way into the living rooms of the good people of America by way( a TV movie! It’s a land where star as faded as Markie Post, Judith Light and Johnny Galecki can shine bright for two precious Sears-sponsored hours. The movie will begin with Marilyn’s parents, perhaps eve at the moment when the archangel visits Marilyn’s moth er. We’ll see the trials andtribu lations of the young genius, in details unseen since Gary Cole Se he Blues Note sge Station, is p.m. luthie Foster, ion, is playing; atchkey Kids,; lid Fantasic, a i etaway Kids, iop at 9:30 p.r She’s every Spice Girl rolled into one smarmy suit, with ‘girl power’ to spare. She’s no sex — she’s a lioness. There’s one thing the Spice Girls have that Marilyn doesn’t, and that’s a major motion picture deal. man’s portrayal ofThe Kid with the 200 IQ. The climax will come as Mar lyn is rocketed into space tofu the Mir space station, along will special guest star Don Knotts. With the debut of Marilyn’s movie, the world will regain hi for a bright tomorrow. When!.: seems full of questions with lir hope for answers, rest easy knowing that you can always “Ask Marilyn.” atchkey Kids, /larooned Recc ,’il Brian and th iouston, is pla> erry Morgan, a he Blues Facto iix Mile Bridge ’ath Ale House wo Paces Wes ig at Sweet Eu Son iugs Chris Martin is a sen journalism m, Rev Mimic Starring Mira [ Jeremy Nortl 1 Directed by G I Toro 1 Rated R * [ Playing at Hoi ** 1/2 Better Ingredients, Better Pizza. he i Customer Appreciation Day Sunday, September 14th Noon - 9:00 p.m. One Large One Topping $4.99 By AARor Staff u fall entomo looked as gc Sorvino, the lew cinematic , then butter! ould become lastime. Outsr ood though, i ists probably cover of GC safe for now. Mimic open Sorvino) as a l iso happens ti wful lot aboul [ineering. In ai id New York ol s, she creates pecies of bugs udas breed. Is oreshadowing The insects Mo the sewers iosed to die wi nonths. Howe ic Park taught lature will fine urvive. Not or lorified cockr plus tax No Limit! 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