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About The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current | View Entire Issue (Sept. 7, 1994)
‘ r 7,1994 Students ed ’‘Reload!" iin, the ABS rship in song imiation call or Christian Koldus. For at 846-0970 Wednesday • September 7, 1994 QPINION The Battalion • Page 11 * jL If. . ft I J . mt J Students find ‘maroon and white’ everywhere Fightin' Texas Aggie speech writers can use Roommate's 'shrine' of Aggieland decorations 'Howdy!' to inspire crowd, whoops of praise leads to contemplations on University culture b: A general p.m. for old ryone in 701 id discuss old * information ir first meet- at 8:30 p.m. g. Anyone is on call Tina ograms: An c- held at 11 cans; "Meet held from 11 in. Come by didales run- 1 political po- call Bo Arm- icil: An engi- ild from 8:30 ■ of the MSC. 1567. nal Age: An 7 p.m. in the ng. Meetings n joining. For a newsletter, rch Strategies . in 402 Rud- udenls get fo- earch process. >e addressed, e Agee or Pat ). ricntation will . Find out the rk experience and a salary. L the complete 1 Julie Agee or 139. mation Ser- course on the m 6-8 p.m. in pen VMS/VAX p.m. in 223A call Mike Ed- m: A general i in 162 Read. i service that and faculty H owdy Ags! Before I in troduce our guest lec turer for the day, I just want to say a few words. I love this school and I love our way of doing things. But we can laugh at ourselves, can’t we Ags? Okay, then, without further delay our guest speaker Mr. Every Ag gie Speech Writer. Howdy Ags! “HOWDY!” Good. I see that you’ve heard an Aggie speech before. The first thing I want to teach you about Aggie speech writing is to al ways start with “Howdy!” If you don’t, people will be confused. It is also a great organiza tional trick. If you haven’t quite decided how you’re going to start your speech, just tell the crowd that you know they can be louder, say howdy again and take the time to organize your thoughts. If you’re still not ready to begin, tell them you want them to be heard all the way down in Austin. Don’t worry - this never gets old. First, you should introduce yourself. Be sure to mention what class you are in, especially if you’re an upperclassman. And if you are from a small Texas town, be sure to refer to it as a thriving me tropolis. Again, this never gets old. Start your speech by telling the audience how much you love A&M, what a great decision they made by coming here and then throw in a joke or funny story. One joke is mandatory for all speeches. I believe it is included in the official A&M regulations, and if it isn’t, it should be. Tell students that these are the best five or six or seven years of their lives. This joke never gets old, so use it as often as you like. If you have a point to your speech, now is the time to bring it up. Be sure to mention some of the things at A&M of which we are most proud. Name as many organizations, dorms, sports teams, fa mous Aggies and classes as possible. The time spent by the audience wildcatting will make your speech appear longer and more entertaining. Don’t feel like you have to have a point. If you try to make a point at the wrong times, the crowd will lose interest. Often at these times Law and Puryear will start yelling at each other and the rest of the crowd will either snicker or start talk ing amongst themselves. Whenever this happens, quickly direct your speech to the nearest opponent in sports and mention how we’re going to beat the hell out of them. Note: if there are no active sports, then just mention how we make a habit of beating the hell out of t.u. every year. This can get complicated since it is more of an involved art form rather than an exact science. Be sure to start by saying we’ll beat the “ever livin’, ever lovin’, compound, complex ...” Do not just say hell. Mention everything you can think of about A&M and always precede it with the words “Fightin’ Texas Aggie”. For example: “Fightin’ Texas Ag gie Smart-Ass Columnist!” Be sure to leave enough time for every one to wildcat after each phrase - unless you use my example, in which case wildcatting will probably not occur. After this, the crowd should be fired up. You will want to end quickly so they are left with a good feeling about your speech. The best way is to thank them for coming out and then say gig em. Do not stray from this formula or the crowd will be confused. As a member of the au dience at an Aggie speech, you also have re sponsibilities. Not every one is given the chance to speak to a bunch of Ag gies. It is up to the rest of us to make sure they feel like they are doing well. To do this you should wildcat after anything that is even slight ly related to you. For example, if I said that I ate breakfast this morning, and you also ate break fast, you should Whoop or AAAAA or whatever it is you do. Do not feel embarrassed for the speaker if you recognize some of the things I have mentioned to day in their speech. Don’t be surprised either. Even though their speech may seem predictable, you will be amazed how much it still motivates you if you let it. Thanks for being able to laugh at yourselves, Ags. Thanks for coming out. And gig ’em. Michael Landauer is a sophomore journalism major I have been in Aggieland for two years now, but I still can’t quite under stand the emphasis placed upon the “Good Ag vs. Bad Ag.” I guess you could defi nitely call my roommate, Layla, a good Ag. In the course of our getting-things- together phone calls this summer, I asked her if she had a lot of Aggie paraphernalia. “Oh ,no!” she said. “I really don’t have much at all.” Yeah, right. I walked into a dorm room that resembled the MSC Bookstore or Loupot’s. Not only was a huge wind sock hanging in the win dow, but there was also a complete Aggie shrine sitting there religiously. Every little gadget, every little knick-knack with the Aggie logo known to man was present. “Well, maybe I have a little more Aggie stuff than I thought,” she said with a little grin. Yeah, Layla, I think you do. So, you might wonder, what is the extent of Aja’s Aggie spirit symbols? Well - I own a glori ous, magnificent, exquisite Aggie 12th Man towel. I know, I know. Right now you must be thinking, just a 12th Man towel? Bad Ag! Bad Ag! But please, let me explain my self before bringing out the ruler to slap my hand. The more militant ones might even want to chop my hand clean off with a bonfire axe. Don’t get me wrong, I have much respect for this school, and the people in it who work so hard to keep the fire burning, figuratively and literally. It’s just that there are some things I still just don’t get. For one thing, am I a bad Ag if I don’t know the words to the Aggie War Hymn backwards, forwards and upside down? Am I a bad Ag if my legs tire at a football game and I decide that I just must take a seat, even if it is only for a sec ond? Am I a bad Ag if I think the redpots are stinky when they return from cut? Am I a bad Ag if I don’t get warm fuzzies when I look at Sully? Am I a bad Ag if I think that Reveille, pretty as she is - Egads! - is a dog? Now, I will be brave enough to actually admit this: there are times when I have gone to a foot ball game and left with my butt a tad dusty be cause I let it graze the bleachers of Kyle Field. There are times when I have hummed the Aggie War Hymn because I did not know all the words, or at least the correct ones. There are times when my nose has wrinkled slightly when the great odor of the cutters rafted my way. I think that it should be obvious that Sully does not give me warm fuzzies. Oh, yeah! And I’ll never forget that time when I walked up to Reveille, petted her, and cooed “Ooh, what 1 a lovely dog!” Needless to say that I received a downright evil look from the Corps dude holding her leash. Well, by now I can see all the fists shaking in the air. “Bad Ag on the loose! Escort her away immediately!” Hold up one minute, will you? I came to this school mainly because of its high lev el of academics and resources that I thought could help me prepare for the real world. Isn’t that what we are all here for, anyway? Now, 1 truly feel that I have received a top-notch education at A&M thus far. As far as that “other stuff’ is con cerned ... well, I wave my 12th man towel as vio lently as any Joe Ag at the football games, and I feel the same swell in my heart that any Ross Vol unteer could at Silver Taps. I do feel a bit removed from this place when I am expected to sing praises to Sully or when people hack on and on and on about multicultur- alism and the lack or need thereof. But I have a problem with ignorance, period - not Texas A&M as a whole. Look at me, I am an Aggie with pride and re spect for my school, my peers and myself. I firmly believe that the true measure of an Aggie should not be who can swing the ax the hardest at cut or who sings the Aggie War Hymn loud est. Aggies come in many sizes, shapes, colors and forms. Please, don’t be so hasty to stamp the “bad Ag” label on someone. Take time to get to know that person, and their inten tions, before making a judgment call. Now, that is what I call good bull. Aja Henderson is a sophomore finance major MICHAEL LANDAUER Columnist Members of the audience at Aggie speeches also have responsibilities. You should Whoop or wildcat after any thing that is even slightly related to you. iiiiiiiiiiimiiiniii in "n ihti yirinr iii^ifiiiiiiMiiiiiiiiiiBiiiiiiMiiBiiiimi I feel removed from this place when I am expected to praise Sully or when people hack about multiculturalism. But I have a problem with ignorance, not Texas A&M. College Republicans err with attack-style politics This letter is in response to the Sept. 1 letter of Chad Walter. I find it curious that Walter attacked the Aggie Democ rats for the Aug. 31 letter of Matt Mur phy, an Aggie expressing his own person al opinion. It is a travesty that the Col lege Republicans ground themselves in the attack-style politics that they have so vigorously pursued against President Clinton, Matt Murphy, and now the Ag gie Democrats. The First Amendment does guarantee the freedom of expression and in that light I express my concern that the Col lege Republicans should protect and de fend that right and not merely attack both Murphy and the Aggie Democrats for Murphy’s opinion. The student body could be better served if Walter would have addressed the issue Murphy was speaking of instead of expressing hostili ty toward both him and the Aggie De mocrats. To imply that Murphy seeks to disregard the First Amendment and therefore dishonor those who have died for it is disheartening. I hope that in the future the person al attacks on President Clinton may cease. Since his election, Clinton has passed such monumental legislation as NAFTA, the Crime Bill, the Brady Bill, the Family and Medical Leave Act, the National Service Act, the Mo tor Voter Bill and most importantly his 1993 Budget Package. During his term the United States is experiencing one of the healthiest economic growth periods in the last 100 years. This president is good for America. For the image of Texas A&M and both political parties, I ask that next time you respond to an issue at hand address the issue with concrete facts, because voter apathy can only be heightened when poli tics denigrates to innuendo instead of is sues. We are all Aggies so let’s show the world we can disagree and still be civil. Eric Gruetzner President, The Aggie Democrats Class of ’94 The Battalion encour ages letters to the editor and will print as many as space allows. Letters must be 300 words or less and Include the au thor's name, class, and phone number. We reserve the right to edit letters lor length. style, and accuracy. Address letters to: The Battalion - Mall Call 013 Reed McDonald Texas A&M University College Station, TX 77843-1111 Fax:(409)845-2647 E-mail: Batt@tamvm1 .tamu.edu The Battalion Editorial Board Belinda Blancarte, Editor in chief Mark Evans, Managing editor Jay Robbins, Opinion editor Jenny Magee, Assistant opinion editor Editorials appearing in The Battalion reflect the views of the editorial board. They do not necessarily reflect the opinions of other Battalion staff members, the Texas A&M student body; regents, administration, faculty or staff. Columns, guest columns cartoons and letters express the opinions of the authors. Contact the opinion editor for Information on submitting guest columns. 1, ^# l.- JL ./-m n-- c - Conservation Crisis Earth, humans should both come first There seems to be a constant tug-of- war between conserving the environ ment and using up the world’s re sources. Both sides have legitimate ar guments, but it’s time to find a happy medium where everyone is satisfied. There’s no doubt that the environ ment has depleted over the last sev eral decades. There are more dirty rivers, extinct animals and a disintegrating ozone lay er that chews away at the earth’s surface. But, in addition to the increase in environmen tal problems, there has come an in crease in population and a corre lated need to use up more natural re sources. Animals and other wildlife may have been on the earth before hu mans, as some conser vationists argue, but hu mans are entitled to their property rights. If people did not have access to natural resources, creating a soci ety would be nearly impossible. It is not right to destroy the envi ronment to meet the needs of man, but a better compliance with protec tive legislation would be found if reg ulations required limited,responsible use of natural resources, rather than allowing exploitation or banning use. It is not feasible to save every sin gle bird, plant and weed in existence. In a society that is money-based and economically driven, this absolute conservation cannot happen. After all, humans have been and will always be more important than animals. Not to say that animals are of less im portance, but human beings must use the Earth to run their civiliza tion. Five bil lion people are the de pendent on fossil fuels, mined ores, cut timber and a host of other harvests for mere survival. It is important to make efforts to save the de pleting environment, but it is equally important to provide people with ade quate natural resources. The issue should not go one way or the other — a balance can be forged to conserve both sides of the issue.