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About The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current | View Entire Issue (Oct. 23, 1989)
Page 16 The Battalion Monday, October 23, id Tenuta converts sellout Rudder crowd to her religion Friday By Chuck Lovejoy Of The Battalion Staff Judy Tenuta, the self-proclaimed Petite Flower of Comedy, took the Rudder Auditorium stage Friday night, but then immediately walked off it and into the crowd to touch her faithful fans as though she were a television evangelist “healing” the wretched. And yes, stud puppets and pseudo-virgins — the crowd was re ady to receive her comedic commu nion. The darkness before Tenuta’s dawn was filled with chants of “Judy! Judy! Judy!” and even repetitive clapping and screams of “I’m a pig in bondage for Judy!” After returning to the stage and offering her trademark growl of “Hey, pigs! Let’s party!” to the audi ence, she commanded that the house lights be turned up. “I want to see my love studs,” the petite goddess explained. “Besides, you aren’t Mormons in the dark.” And it was this statement that set the tone for the rest of the evening — an evening dripping with deli ciously raunchy humor and gags from the comedienne who tells the victims of her ruthless fun that “An insult from me is like a blessing from the Pope.” She told the sellout crowd she was here to convert them to her religion. “Judy-ism,” before instructing her subjects to raise their right hands and repeat the denomination’s sol emn vow: “I promise to destroy all hogs who do not worship Judy. I will kill them — I will maim them — I will destroy them — and then — I will date them.” And in her concert, a presentation of MSC Town Hall, Tenuta proved that she should be worshipped — at least as a talented, an original and, more importantly, a consistently funny and coherent comic. Tenuta related several anecdotes, the funniest of which centered around (if that’s possible) her “omni present” roommate, Blowsanne: “She got mad at me because I tripped over her salt lick — yeah, like I was supposed to know she was grazing.” Another notable sequence cen tered around a “nonvisual” date she had during which her escort took her to his uncle’s wake, prompting her to say to him, “Oh yeah, like I’m really gonna spread now!” But the highlight of the evening was when Tenuta pulled onstage James Hodges, a junior political sci ence major and Corps sergeant in Squadron 15, forced him to his knees and mounted him like a horse while singing and cracking a bullw- hip. This was not the first time Tenuta had picked on Hodges, either. Ear lier, she asked him what he did on campus all day, and when he didn’t give her a satisfactory answer, re torted, “Oh, so you just stand around in uniform — just like the rest of our armed forces!” Another high point was when Tenuta told about her response to a guy who asked her to have safe sex with him: “For you, that’s when the cow doesn’t kick you in the head.” Another Judy gem: “I, too, could have been in a sorority, but they wouldn’t let me in because I already had a personality.” Tenuta sang with a strong voice, and even declared herself the “Em press of Elvis Impersonators” by dancing in everything-gyratingfa ton to “Jailhouse Rock.” She completely outclassed opt ing Austin comedian Amos Ewing Ewing, although sometiitf. funny, suffered from a diseat called “My jokes are too damn long At several points during an erably long discussion about son. thing called a Swiss Army keyring audience members were scream:; “No!” and “No more!” But how could he even have a pected to shine alongside the co® dienne who declared: “I likeimne the way I like my subways - sweaty and with the faint scent urine.” Vo I p sior plas mil' ble C the kep eno Pep met m £ Me Donald's INTRAMURAL HIGHLIGHTS sponsored by McDonald’s Post Oak Mall • Hwy 21 Manor East Mall • University Dr. Texas Ave. at S.W. Parkway Breakfast Every Morning • 5 locations • Drive Thru just and don A wer for froi C said for flyii Entries Open: Oct.16 Entries Close: Oct. 24 8-Ball Singles Flickerball Entry Fee: $4.00 per person Entry Fee: $20.00 per Team Play Begins: Wednesday, Nov. 1 Play Begins: Tuesday, October 31 Innertube Water Basketball Entry Fee: $20.00 per Team Play Begins: Sunday, October 29 Entries Open: Oct. 23 Entries Close Oct. 31 Kayak Workshop San Marcos River October 28-29 Fee: $40 ($50 non-A&M), includes camping and kayak equipment, camping permit and experienced instruction Registration: Oct. 9 - 23. Class size limited. Rock Climbing Enchanted Rock State Natural Area November 10-12 Fee: $30 ($35 non-A&M), includes camping equip ment, camping permits, and experienced instruction. Registration: Oct. 23 - Nov. 6. Limited to 10. Photo by Lynda Bottos Michael Bachmeyer is all concentratior as he throws for a winning team score in Horseshoe Doubles competition. He and David Hortenstine took the Men's A Division. Backpacking Lost Maples State Natural Area November 10-12 Champions lit Fee: j ree: $35 ($40 non-A&M), includes equipment, food, 3 arui experienced instruction. Congratulations 10 winners of the jj§||^ sports 11|^; A. Registration: Oct. 23 - Nov. 6 Horseshoe Doubles Men's A David Hortenstine Women's A Kathryn Schofield CoRec A David Hortenstine Men's B Gary Webster CoRec B Keith Scott Men's C James Kratz Michael Bachmeyer Shari Coleman Marisa Janke Tim Wolf Shannon Lee Duncan Russell The Texas A&M Judo Team came home with six medals to finish second overall in the Annual Cactus Jack Tournament. Individual winners were Trent Cox, Hiram Hodges, John Hughes, David Schmidt, David Baker, and Jack Long. The TAMU Bowling Team competed in the first TIBC tournament of the year in Amarillo. Top scorers were Corey Atkinson, 194; Randy Deweese, 181: Angie Dolezal, 178; Bob Gargett, 183; Eric Peng, 181; Sandy Slater, 153; and Staci Tucker, 156. Scuba Dive in Cozumel!! December 15-18 Fee: Divers -$450 ($470 non-A&M), Non-divers -$375 ($395 for non A&M), air fare and lodging included. The diving package includes 2 boat dives, 2 lunches, unlimited beach diving and tanks, weights, and belts. Registration: Sept. 18-Nov. 1. Limited to 20 participants Back Country Skiing January 6-13 Ski St. Paul's superb powder, in the San Juan Mountains between Silverton and Ouray, Colorado! The St. Paulii a comfortable inn, complete with kerosene lamps, wood burning stove, and a sauna. Fee: $399 ($420 non-A&M) covers transportation, lodging, food, equipment, instruction and guides. Registration: Oct. 9 - Nov. 30. Limited to 13. All registration for TAMU Outdoors Is taken In 159 Read. For more information, call Patsy Greiner at 845-7826. Acknowledgements: McDonald's Intramural Highlights is spon sored in by your local McDonald's Restaurant at University Drive Manor East Mall, Hwy 21, Texas Ave. at SW Parkway and PostOa- Mall. Stories are by Mark Figart, graphics are by Paul Irwin and pho tographs are by Rec Sports photographers. A By J Of 7) T< mine are t “(l in IE conn Male stud< So Hist< Univ Hi Help sens< Plus, pres: pres: “f that, entei the i: Univ camj ilililii REC: SPORTS WEEKLY CALENDAR MONDAY October 23 TUESDAY October 24 WEDNESDAY October 25 THURSDAY October 26 FRIDAY October 27 SATURDAY October 28 Entries Open: Racquetball Doubles Frisbee Golf Entries Close: Innertube Water B-Ball Flickerball 8-Ball Singles Captain's Meetings: Innertube Water Basketball 5 pm, 164 Read Flickerball 6 pm, 164 Read 8-Ball Singles Brackets Posted, 1 pm A&M at Rice SUNDAY October 29 Daylight Savings Time Ends Rog<