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About The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current | View Entire Issue (July 21, 1989)
The Battalion OPINION Tht 2S Friday, July 21, 1989 Fri< / 77/£r Comedy Ham Of Bush and Quwlc : / ... WELL, THOSE FELLOWS... THOSE ASTEOWUTS...UP THERE...LONG T/ME AGO...UP THERE DOING THAT THING...UP THERE IN SPACE...UP THERE WITH A THOUSAND POINTS OF U6HT (n*-H».')...DOMb THAT THIHG... MEN I mm ABOUT APOLLO 11, J /AM REMINDED OF ANOTHER. FAMOUS AMERICAN: WINSTON CHURCHILL, THE FIRST LMN IN ORBIT WASN'T IT SANDHI WHO SAID: "ONE omr LEAP FOP MAN, A / SMALL STEP TOR TJTE REST OF US'?. C , , OF mS THAT I \( Buz - luklns ? Society flat out wroii about Earth’s shape As I was reading through the special Apollo 11 moon walk anniversary sec tion of the Houston Chronicle the other morning at breakfast, I came across the headline “Some say moon walk was hoax.” fggQftee qushJ I wasn’t too surprised to hear that. I already knew that some people think the moon walk was a hoax, because I saw a program about it on public tele vision. ipp Isyst A Ellen Hobbs Editor Maybe you saw the program. It was about a guy who was obsessed with proving to the world that man never walked on the moon. He believed NASA used Hollywood’s technology to create the illusion that man walked on the moon, much like Hollywood created the illusion that the people in “Lost in Space” were actually lost in space. Bloodthirsty Simon Legree SlaveG ers,” and call them the first perpeiu of the “BIG LIE.” Iinsi [30 ] pre L [end Item Juri lical] C land Most Americans would saythaiit one of the most ridiculous thingsil ever heard. But the members oftktl Earth Society, now 2,800 strong,s ‘theory’ of a round Earth is thei diculous thing they’ve ever heard jthe [elec [buil B talk I said C Mail Call Trouble with trees EDITOR: Puzzled about crosswords EDITOR. How come it’s illegal to poison old oak trees in Austin, while in College Station trees can be cut down at will, without the permission of the students who spend more time outside with the Texas A&M landscape than do the paper pushers in offices who never have to see the trees, or the lack thereof? Carol Malone ’90 I am curious to know why The Battalion does not have a crossword puzzle. Most major campus newspapers, including the University of Texas’ paper, contain one. This matter might seem trivial and even a bit funny to some. However, to crossword buffs, the puzzle’s much needed addition would be greatly appreciated. Homer Wells Letters to the editor should not exceed 300 words in length. The editorial staff reserves author's intent. Each letter must he signed and must include the classification, address the right to edit letters for style and length, but will make every effort to maintain the and telephone number of the writer. The program was set up like this: First they would show this guy who built a replica in his basement of a movie set like the one he thought NASA used to take the photographs of men who were allegedly on the moon. Then they’d show some scientist or researcher or ex pert of some sort who would say, “This guy is really looney tunes.” “It’s no secret (that the Earth is 1 Johnson told the Chronicle. "Its? part of the language. When werefd height,’ when we say some land: 3,000 feet in height, we mean3,(lj above sea level and that’s the ter level. And level means flat." IN n So, anyway, I knew there were people around who never believed we had walked on the moon. It didn’t startle me too much. Johnson also said the Earth hasit flat, or else a submarine would no| able to travel straight to EuropeB America without going through) earth. Congress can’t fix financial disaster However, the bulk of the Chronicle story was not on the actual moon walk hoax, but instead was about a group called the International Flat Earth Re search Society. If this was a PBS program, it* be about time for the expert Ph.D. to come on and say, “These: pie’s brains are made of sawdust.' A Itoug milli lof ti jto tl | Mon D; [with [the 1 Pt The members of the Flat Earth So- I know what you’re asking yod right now. You’re asking, “Whatn a person think that the Earth ij when everyone else is telling hiiM ently?” For Johnson, it wastheoldSi Claus legend. |azin< Se I told you so, didn’t I? I tell you to keep your eyes on those gutless wonders in Congress as they are fixin’ to fix this S&L mess they created in the first place? I am telling you right now, the fix is going to be the biggest rotten rip-off since the S&L greedheads made off with zillions in the first place. Cheez! No shame at all.Remember, this little piece of corporate welfare legislation is going to cost every one of us — man, woman and child — $1,000. If you’re married with two toddlers, you’re in for $4K. At least. If they keep on doing what they’ve been doing, the tab will go higher. The Financial Democracy Campaign, which is some of your good-head South ern populists, came up with a just solu tion for this mess, which is to make the people responsible for it pay for it by these means: S&Ls from their notorious racist redlin ing.) That’s partly because although Kennedy is a good liberal, he’s not the brightest porch light on the block, so the other members are not going to take a cue from him, plus—same old problem, you and me, Jack, we got no lobbyists up there. The S&Ls do, the banks do, the securities firms do, but us — so far we’re too dumb to even get mad about this. ciety not only believe there was no moon walk, but also, as their name implies, they believe the earth is flat. The society claims the Earth is shaped like a record album, or for those of you who don’t recall exactly what vinyl al bums look like, a compact disc. The North Pole, then, would be the little hole in the center of the disk and the South Pole is a ridge of ice around the edge. Johnson said grown-ups had told: for years that Santa Claus was real) he believed them, until he enough to realize it was just anothej of those things adults say to keeplj from becoming intellectually indel dent too early. jcier I an e; Tl Igare ; Hun Hun jhote foun I Hun Fc I thought we could count on Henry B. Gonzalez, the old freedom fighter from San Antonio who is now chairman of the House Banking Committee, to get us a bailout that would put the bur den where it belongs — on the sorry in dividuals who pushed for and profited from the lunacy of S&L deregulation from the git-go. But Gonzalez is up to his keester just fighting off the worst, most crazed demands of the still-mighty S&L lobby. Hell, Henry’s just barely holding off the sold-out Senate commit tee that wants to keep M. Danny Wall, the fixer of this entire financial disaster, as chairman of the Federal Home Loan Bank Board. • Use of the proceeds from the liqui dation of insolvent S&Ls • Retained earnings from the 12 dis trict Home Loan Bank Boards • Increased deposit insurance pre miums for thrifts and commercial banks (the commercials have as BIG self-inter est in pulling out the S&L’s because they’ll all go together if they go) You have to quit wasting your time on diddly crap like this flag-burning cru sade. One jerk burns a flag and you peo ple want to change the Constitution of the United States. While all the profes sional patriots, led by our peerless presi dent, are whipping up patriotic senti ment against flag-burning, the thieves who broke into the S&Ls are now into our homes, carrying off the furniture, the clothes and the food. Wake up, peo ple. Then when the grown-ups silo's him globes in elementary school knew better than to let himselfbefel again. But, you scoff, what about the sun? Why do we have night and day? Where does the sun go if the earth is flat? “It’s perfectly simple,” Johnsons? “All you have to do is step outside: check it out. Look.” That’s easy, the society says. God just flips a switch and the sun comes on in the morning, and then he shuts it off at night. The same with the moon. Isn’t that simple? Well, I went outside, and 1 The Flat Earth Society hasagoodp The Earth looks pretty flat stal across the polo field with my two fee: the ground. • One-time fees levied on financial firms such as the money brokers, secur- ties firms, appraisers and accounting firms that contributed so handsomely to the S&L insolvencies The Senate chairman is Jake Garn of Utah and M. Danny was Cam’s top aide for 14 years, from whose happy position he wrote the lunatic law deregulating S&Ls with the able assistance of his very dear friends, the top S&L lobbyists. In his present position, M. Danny went on to distinguish himself by holding a fire sale of troubled S&Ls late last year as time was running out so more greed- heads could make more staggering profits. • Special purpose tax on interest in come earned by foreign investors in this country (you know that one would be popular) As a final note on patriotism in our time, consider the words of James W. Hall, currently on trial for espionage, an Army warrant officer who became a spy for the Soviet Union. On videotape, Hall said, “I wasn’t terribly short of money. I just decided I didn’t ever want to worry where my next dollar was com ing from. I’m not anti-American, I wave the flag as much as anybody else.” God, they say, lives in Heaven, which is located in the nebulous area up above the disk of Earth. Charles K. Johnson, the president of the Flat Earth Society, says Heaven might be only 4,000 miles above the Earth’s surface. Society members aren’t impressed with the body of scientific research that disputes their beliefs. In fact, they call the Greek astronomers who first came up with the theory that the earth is shaped more like a ping-pong ball than a frisbee “Crazed Fiendish Perverted But I’m afraid I just can’t take fc proof. It goes against my grainW consider the research of a couni number of people, people who han done all their research with their feet planted firmly on the ground- gotta keep believing that the Earf round. Sorry, guys, I’m not convertedi sure was a great article to reado« bowl erf Cocoa Crispies. Ellen Hobbs is a junior journal: major and editor o/The Battalion. • Tax receipts collected by recons- trucing the present deductions for lux ury second homes And all that together will about pay for the S&L mess instead of making all of us pay for it. Young Joe Kennedy of Massachusetts carried a bill with some of these suggestions in it and got but no where in the House (although he did manage to get in a provision stopping The Battalion (USPS 045 360) Member of Texas Press Association Southwest Journalism Conference The Battalion Editorial Board Ellen Hobbs, Editor Juliette Rizzo, Opinion Page Editor Fiona Soltes, City Editor Drew Leder, Chuck Squatriglia, News Editors Steven Merritt, Sports Editor Kathy Haveman, Art Director Hal Hammons, Makeup Editor Editorial Policy The Battalion is a non-profit, self-supporting newspa per operated as a community service to Texas A&M and Bryan-College Station. Opinions expressed in The Battalion are those of the editorial board or the author, and do not necessarily rep resent the opinions of Texas A&M administrators, fac ulty or the Board of Regents. The Battalion also serves as a laboratory newspaper for students in reporting, editing and photography classes within the Department of Journalism. The Battalion is published Monday through Friday during Texas A&M regular semesters, except for holiday and examination periods. Mail subscriptions are $17.44 per semester, $34.62 per school year and $36.44 per full year. Advertising rates furnished on request. Our address: The Battalion, 230 Reed McDonald, Texas A&M University, College Stadon, TX 77843-1 111. Second class postage paid at College Station, TX 77843. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to The Battal ion, 216 Reed McDonald, Texas A&M University, Col lege Station TX 77843-4 111. Si m T ■j lice stat Frii pre mis the me mo of t wa? pla pec anc blu ton nai of blu be oft the afti Z MAftSl/ltf f s V V V S) V s M s< S