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Page 14 The Battalion Thursday, February 16,1989 Reviews A&M band satirizes life, parodies campus groups 20 Songs a Day to a Happier, Healthier You! For Cryin’ Out Loud Basilhead Records ★★★ By S. Hoechstetter REVIEWER Imagine a band that’s a hybrid of The Judy’s and the Violent Femmes. It’s not that far-fetched an idea — the band is called For Cryin’ Out Loud and the members are Texas A&M students. Their album, 20 Songs a Day to a Happier, Healthier You! combines crazy lyrics like The Judy’s (except For Cryin’ Out Loud’s lyrics are even crazier) with vocals and instrumen tals that sound frighteningly similar to the Femmes’. Drummer Mike Thompson, a sophomore business major, says the band members used to listen to the Violent Femmes a lot, which in fluenced how they sound today. Lately, however, they have been writing some songs in which they do not pattern themselves after the Femmes so much, Thompson said. This comical, talented trio has a different way of looking at life and the kind of people found at A&M. Vocalist Chris Cessac spares no one from his biting but humorous parodies. Included in the list of people he makes fun of afe Vanna White, soro rities, fraternities, Corps of Cadets members, cowboys, Elvis, bowlers and fad-followers. But be warned: If you don’t han dle good-natured teasing too well, you might not Find the humor here. Cessac has no mercy. He has some thing to say about almost everyone. “Shut Up (Sorority Bitch)” is a parody of sorority members. In a sarcastic tone Cessac whines, “Daddy, Daddy! I’ve been black balled! The other sisters caught me drinking domestic beer from a can!” “The C.T. Song” is not a favorable portrayal of the Corps, but it is funny and it is a different experi ence to hear a song that can only ap ply to Texas A&M. Guitarist Bob Burrus even plays the First few bars of the “Aggie War Hymn” in the song. “But be warned: If you don’t handle good-natured teasing too well, you might not find the humor here. Cessac has no mercy.” Other songs in which the lyrics Were inspired by watching students at A&M include “How Hicks Im press Chicks” and “In Another Life I Was a Squirrel”. Not all of For Crying Out Loud’s songs are about college life. “I Wish I Had No Brain” pokes fun of people who are rich and phys ically attractive while portraying what a shallow life such people lead. For Cryin’ Out Loud uses creative metaphors in songs like “Life is a Pink Floyd Song” and “I’m Gum Stuck On the Shoe of Fate”. Again they show they have differ ent but interesting ways of looking at life. An interesting little quip is added at the end of “In Another Life I Was a Squirrel”. Cessac quietly says, “Political reform does not begin at the barber shop.” The album also includes several songs that are nonsensical and just there for fun, like “I’m in Love With Judy Jetson.” No metaphors or deep, meaningful statements here — just fun. “Weezer’s New Auto” and “The Continuing Tale of Weez” are two songs in a continuing saga of a guy named Weezer who ditches his old junker car for a new, strange- looking car. He drives around the world pick ing up ancient philosophers and messiahs who are hitchhiking. They discuss the age-old question of “Is pop art really art?” and get so en grossed in their conversation that Weezer drives off the end of the earth. The album probably will not get much air play because some of the lyrics would be considered inappro priate for public broadcast. But the band occasionally does play live around town. 20 Songs a Day to a Happier, Healthier You! is funny and fun to listen to, but you have to be able to swallow your pride and relax enough to laugh at yourself. Y et another poor film for Candy “Who’s Harry Crumb?” Starring John Candy Directed by Paul Flahferty Rated PG-13 ★ By Shane Hall REVIEWER Who’s Harry Crumb? Well, he’s not anyone worth making a movie about. “Who’s Harry Crumb” is a “crumby” John Candy comedy full of bad slaps tick and unfunny moments. Overall, the Film is a waste of Candy’s comic talents. Candy stars as Harry Crumb, a bungler from a family of great detectives. When the daughter of a rich man is kidnapped, Harry’s corrupt boss, Eliot Draisen (Jef frey Jones) assigns him to the case, knowing Harry is too inept to solve it. Eliot is the man who masterminded the kidnapping to begin with. Harry is convinced the kidnap per is the girl’s greedy, nympho maniac stepmother (Annie Potts), Helen Downing. Helen, however, is trying to kill her husband to in herit his millions. This movie could have been a funny piece of slapstick, but di rector Paul Flaherty (a former cast member of the television comedy “SCTV” like Candy) seems content to fill the movie with an endless number of over worked routines. Harry is forever tumbling over chairs, smashing valuable items of Eliot’s and wrecking cars. The only clever moments come when Harry gets caught in a ceiling fan and when he is flung through a maze of air- conditioning ducts. Except for a few other funny moments, how ever, the movie is witless and mo ronic. Harry fancies himself to be a master of disguise, but the dis guises he assumes are neither convincing nor funny. Most of his aliases amount to little more than makeup tricks, and not very good ones at that. The late Peter Sellers did the master of disguise routine 10 times funnier and more effec tively in the “Pink Panther” mov ies. John Candy himself is a tal ented comic, but he is not allowed to show how funny he is because of a lame script, which has been occuring with disturbing fre quency. His ability to satirize bad comedy on “SCTV” is memora ble, but his movie output has left much to be desired. Films such as “Summer Rental” and “The Great Outdoors” are examples. He was lucky enough to appear only in voice in “Hot to Trot,” where he was the voice of a talk ing horse. John Hughes’ hilarious “Planes, Trains and Automobi les” is one of the few bright spots in an otherwise dismal record. “Who’s Harry Crumb” unfortu nately is another mark in the bad movie column. Replacements offer pure rock ’n’ roll The Replacements Don’t Tell a Soul Sire Records ★★★ By S. Hoechstetter STAFF WRITER Be on the lookout for The Re- lacements’ soon-to-be-released al um, Don’t Tell a Soul. It is the band’s third major release, and they sound stronger than ever before. Don’t Tell a Soul is packed with emotion and pure rock ’n’ roll. The album title may be deceiving because this Minneapolis foursome tells us everything as the songs roll by. “We’ll Inherit the Earth” seems to catch the whole meaning of the al bum in one song. It is a catchy tune that embodies the album title within its lyrics that say, “We’ll inherit the earth but don’t tell anybody/ It’s been ours since birth and it’s ours al ready.” “Achin’ to Be” is about a girl who is longing to feel love and life. Lead vocalist Paul Westerberg’s strong voice conveys the sorrow and frus tration he feels when he is near this girl. A short harmonica solo enhances the feelings of desperation and emo tional desolation. “They’re Blind” is a slow song that almost sounds like it could have been one of those songs from a 1950s sock hop where Jimmy and Betty danced cheek-to-cheek for the first time. “Almost” is the key word there, of course. It is still recognizable as a post-Spinners-era song. Most of Side One is pretty tame. The Replacements let us daydream through the first side and then ru dely slap us back to the present with a long, loud shriek at the beginning of the First song on Side Two. “Anywhere is Better Than Here” is a tough song. It is impatient and gives the listener a sense of dissatis faction. It sets the tone for most of the rest of the album, which is harsh and wild. “I’ll Be You” already is getting some radio play and is sure to be one of the most popular songs off the al bum. “I Won’t” is raw rock ’n’ roll. This is the song that will cause the neighbors to complain when it is turned up loud, the kind of song that you play to relieve tension. The last two songs on the album, “Rock ’n’ Roll Ghost” and “Darlin’ One” are slower songs that add to the richness of the soul-baring that The Replacements do on Don’t Tell a Soul. The Replacements’ new album should be in the record stores soon. It is their best album yet and is sure to please any devotee of The Re placements and anyone fond of good rock ’n’ roll. But remember: Don’t tell a soul. Eerie digital mixes evoke reminders of nightmares Belief Nitzer Ebb Geffen Records ■kit By S. Hoechstetter REVIEWER Belief, the new album by Nitzer Ebb, should be in every dj’s collec tion. Their music is frequently heard in dance clubs because of its strong mechanical beat. Nitzer Ebb should not produce al bums, however, because listening to the entire 40 minutes of repetitive computerized sounds could be haz ardous to your mental health. The band uses repetition of deep, frightening sounds with lots of booms and shouting. These are the sounds you hear in nightmares When the album ends, your heart is racing. Everything seems strangely silent. The phone rings and scares you out of your skin. But it’s not nec essarily a bad album. Douglas McCarthy and Bon Har ris’ vocals are more like talking in a raspy voice than singing. Actually, Belief doesn’t have notes or instru mentals. It’s mostly just 40 minutes of computerized digital mixes. “Control I’m Here” is the most en ergetic song on the album. It’s al ready being played in some of the more progressive clubs and is highly recognizable with McCarthy and Harris shouting,“Shut the door/ Shut the door/ Control I’m here.” “T.W.A.” starts off with a voice and sounds from a control tower saying, “TWA eight-forty-seven,” then another voice says, “Surren der!” This could be a comment on the dangers of air travel but it’s doubtful that Nitzer Ebb is aiming to start a revolution through their mu sic. “Blood Money” is an interesting song. It starts off with a few seconds of heavy breathing and works itself into lines like, “Money for blood- /Don’t take that cross away/don’t take that cash away.” The lyrics in the other songs are not especially intellectual. As with their music, Nitzer Ebb chooses two or three words or phrases for each song and repeats them. But in their case it works. “Captivate” and “Drive” are the only two songs on the album that dis tinguish themselves from the others because they are slow and don’t re peat the common beat. Even though Nitzer Ebb creates good dance mixes, it’s not something to listen to if you want to raise your spirits. Listening to the whole album leaves you dazed and queasy. Listen ing to only two or three songs is okay, but Nitzer Ebb should stay in the clubs where they are played in small doses. Around Town Live Music Brazos Landing Brazos Landing is at Northgate. Everyone is admitted. Beer, wine and mixed drinks are served. For more information, call 846-3497. Thursday — Hootenanny (fea turing Dru Wilson and Had Bi- nion). Rock. $3 cover. Friday — Quizumba. Brazilian music. $5 cover. Saturday — Self Righteous Brothers. Rock. $3 cover. Sunday — Guidance. Reggae. $2 cover. Tuesday — Scroocs. Grateful Dead music. Cover TBA. Cow Hop Annex Next to the restaurant at North- gate. Those 18 and older ad mitted. Alcohol served to legal drinkers. Call 846-1588 for more information. Thursday — The Monads. Rock. $2 cover. Friday — The Band With No Sleep. Rock. $2 cover. Saturday — The Starvin’ Marvin Band. Rock. $2 cover. Wednesday — Singalong with Sneaky Pete. $ 1 cover. Emiliano’s In Bryan at 502 W. 25th St. Beer, wine and set-ups served. Call 775- 9539 for more information. Thursday — The Brotherhood Band. Latin/Spanish. No cover for women, $5 cover for men. Friday — Tierra Mala. Spanish. Cover $3-$5. Saturday — Tierra Mala. Span ish. Cover $3-$5. Frank’s Bar and Grill In College Station at 503 E. Uni versity Drive. All ages are ad mitted. Beer, wine and liquor are served to legal drinkers. Call 846- 5388 for more information. Saturday — Memorandum. Jazz. $2 cover. Hall of Fame In Bryan on FM 2818 north of Villa Maria. Those 18 to 20 ad mitted on selected dates. Alcohol served to legal drinkers. Call 822- 2222 for more information. Thursday — Nightlife. $2 cover. Friday — Texas Unlimited. $4 cover. Saturday — Nightlife. $4 cover. Kay’s Cabaret At Post Oak Mall. Those 18 and over are admitted. Beer, wine and liquor served to legal drink ers. For more information, call 696-9191. Thursday — Don Overby. Originals and classic oldies. No cover. Friday — Subculture. Dance mu sic. $2 cover. Saturday — Stonefish Square. Rock ’n’ roll. $2 cover. Movies Cinema Three Located at 315 College Ave. in the Skaggs Shopping Center. Call 693-2796 for more information. The Fly II. Rated R. Showtimes are 7:15 p.m. and 9:15 p.m. Who’s Harry Crumb? Rated PG- 13. Showtime is 7:20 p.m. Tap. Rated PG-13. Showtime is 9:10 p.m. True Believer. Rated R. Show- times are 7 p.m. and 9:05 p.m. Opens Friday. Post Oak Three Located in the Post Oak Mall. Call 693-2796 for more information. Working Girl. Rated R. Show- times are 7 p.m. and 9:20 p.m. Ends Friday. The Naked Gun. Rated PG-13. Point of View This is a perfect title I’m reading a newspaper. The story I’m reading is odd but I think I may like it anyway. But now I’m not quite myself reading this newspaper. I’m some one else — I’m a man and I’m in love. I look up from my newspaper and I see the woman I love coming toward me. She is beautiful, and as she walks toward me I have trouble not staring at her. What should I say to her? I do not know if she even likes me; I only know that I love her and want her to love me. I must think of some thing to say to her when she gets close enough to talk to. “Hey, babe! How’s it going?” No. Too personal. “Hello,” quietly, with a smile. No, she may think that I don’t want to talk to her. I must think of some thing else, but she is almost to me and I can’t think of anything. I can feel my heart pounding fast and my cheeks feel hot, so I know I’m blushing. I try to smile, but I think it isn’t a very good smile. She’s here! I must say something! “Hey,” I’m saying. “How is every thing?” “Oh, hi!” she answers, like she didn’t see me. Did she really not see me, or is she just acting that way? “E- verything’s OK. How’re you?” I want to say I’m very lonely and would like to spend lots of time with her, but I ca’t say that, as I might be hurt. I’m saying, “Oh, OK. I’m just bumming around looking for some thing to do.” I don’t know what to say and I just stop talking. I wish she’d suggest something. Ask me to go somewhere with her. I’ll say yes. She smiles at me and her eyes are as beautiful as I remember them be ing and I’m slightly surprised that they really are that beautiful. I’m imagining us somewhere private and I’m looking into those eyes as I tell her I love her. “Well,” she says, “I have to go meet some people for lunch,” and sh glances past me. I must make her stay with me longer, but I can’t. She has made plans and I must respect that. “OK. Well, maybe I’ll see you around.” But I can’t wait until I bump into her again. “And if you ever get bored or anything, you could call me or some thing.” “Yeah, sure,” she answers and sounds sincere, but I’ve made this suggestion before and she has never called and I don’t know what to make of her reaction. She says, “See ya,” and walks off. ’Bye,” I’m saying as I watch her leave. I’m depressed because I didn’t find the right thing to say and I still don’t know if she likes me and I’m going to have to wait to find out. I turn back to reading the newspa per and am almost done reading this story. I realize that I am completely myself again and I realize that I liked this and I wonder if there might be some kind of sequel written by a woman that tells the other side of it. I don’t know and will have to wait and find out as I’ve come to the end of this side of the story. I’m turning the page. . . This story was written by Michael Freeman, a sophomore chemistry major. Do you have something to say? Want to have your creative writ ing published? Send your essays, stories, poems, etc. to The Battal ion, “As I See It,” care of the en tertainment editor. We will consider all submis sions labeled with the author’s name, classification and major or job title, and phone number for publication in the entertainment section. Bring or mail your work to The Battalion, Room 216 Reed McDonald. Classic ’20s love story told by Gershwin tunes By Shane Hall REVIEWER The 1920s spirit of George and Ira Gershwin will be brought to life at 8 p.m. Friday in Rudder Audito rium with the MSC-OPAS Theater Series’ presentation of “My One and Only.” This musical play features the Gershwin’s lyrics and score. “My One and Only” is a story set in the art-deco era of the 1920s. This boy-meets-girl play centers on Capt. Billy Buck Chandler, a Texas pilot who wants to be the first American pilot to fly nonstop to Paris. He falls in love with Edith Her bert, a famous water ballet star, which stifles his plans for a trans-At lantic flight. Edith, meanwhile, is closely watched by her jealous man ager, a Russian prince. Other characters in the musical include a bootlegging bishop and a love-struck female mechanic. Described by The New York Times as the only musical “that sends us home on air,” “My One and Only” features plenty of dance num bers from a tap dancing chorus to accompany the Gershwin music. Some of the songs featured in the musical are “S’Wonderful,” “He Loves and She Loves,” “My One and Only,” “Nice Work If You Can Get It,” and the classic “Strike Up the Band.” Tickets to “My One and Only” are on sale at Rudder Box Office for $22 for adults and $17.50 for students. If the show is not sold out on perfor mance night, $5 tickets will be avail able to Texas A&M students from 7:30-7:55 p.m. yie Showtimes are 7:20 p.m. * 9:20 p.m. Ends Friday. Her Alibi. Rated PG. Showtim are 7:10 p.m. and 9:25 p.m. Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adv® ture. Rated PG. Opens Friday, The Burbs. Rated PG. Opensft day. Schulman Six In Bryan at 2002 E. 29th Sir# Call 775-2643 for more inform; lion. Tequila Sunrise. Rated R. Shi times are 7:25 p.m. and 9:50p. Twins. Rated PG. Showtimes; 7:20 p.m. and 9:30 p.m. Big. Rated PG-13. Showtimes^ 7:15 p.m. and 9:45 p.m. A Fish Called Wanda. R Showtimes are 7:10 p.m. % 9:40 p.m. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels. PG-13. Showtimes are 7 p.m.jj 9:25 p.m. • Scrooged. Rated PG-13. Slit times are 7:05 p,m..and 9:35p, Plaza Three In College Station at 226Soul west Parkway. Call 693-245' more information. Rain Man. Rated R.Showtimn are 7 p.m. and 9:35 p.m. Beaches. Rated PG-13. times are 7:10 p.m. and 9:40p,m Three Fugitives. Rated PC, Showtimes are 7:20 p.m. ami 9:45 p.m. Manor East Three In Bryan in the Manor East M4 Call 823-8300 for more inform] non. Mississippi Burning. Rated Showtimes are 7:05 p.m. aol 9:40 p.m. The Accidental Tourist. Ra PG. Showtimes are 7:15 p.m, 9:30 p.m. Dangerous Liaisons. Rated Showtimes are 7:20 p.m. am 9:45 p.m. Brownfid solo cam! right mow NEW YORK (AP) - Bo: Brown had completed recording sions in Los Angeles for his seed solo album, but he thought sot thing was missing. Seeking inspiration, he and ducer Gene Griffin headed for York. The result was “My Prero; live,” a No. I 'dtnash off the selling “Don’t Be Cruel.” “I fell my album was lackinf strong, aggressive song,” he said, “A lot of things had been about Bobby Brown, why ms doing this (a solo career). It’s my of expressing to people it's your ogative to do as you want but ma sure what you do is the right thini Brown has erased any about his decision to leave NewEi lion in 1987. “I It’s my way of expressing to people it’s your prerogative to do as you want but make sure what you do is the right thing.” — Bobby Brow DENVER (. jeople clean o ind useless cli ert T. Bakker the closets of tl he finds remna known species < “What we’re saur gold rush, versity of Color But the rusf earth, it’s to se; museums, whe saur bones ar stored since the “Twenty or found every ye says Bakker. “Most good search storage manuscript wai In the past f has “read” the believes are fo nosaurs, inclu been research nounced. “The four 1 up, glued tog studied,” Bakk ; Although he originally lu planned to return to the groupal one album, the success of “Don! Cruel” and his first solo recot “King of Stage,” have establish him as a major star in his own rigli “None of these songs could B come by New Edition,” Brown sa “I wanted to express moreofmc.l a group you’re limited. You to different roles” Brown grew up in the same Ik ton ghetto of Roxbury as fellow to Edition members Ralph Tresm Michael Bivins, Ricky BellandEtf nie DeVoe. They began singing! gether in 1981 when Brown was 15 The group had devoted fans. “In one town, it got totallyoul hand and we all ended upintheto pital.” Brown said. “We were going to the show at when our car pulled up a gentleto we-thought was with the organic told us to go through this door. “But it was the wrong door,H audience turned around and sad and they started chasing us. Wed terrified.” Brown decided in 1987 to go® on his own. “It was time for a direcii 1 change,” he said. “I loved thegr# and we will be friends forever to 1 would catch myself going into« own thing at times on stage. “I have a real energetic type personality. They were going for! American boys so to speak. 1 wai® to express more to my audience. His first solo alburn containedi single, “Girl Friend,” which topf the R&B charts. But on stage, least, some adjusting was necessar 1 “I went on a tour with Readyk the World,” he said. “I gotuptkfj and I was going through a NewE'l tion song . . .and I would start® ticipating that Ralph would come for his part. “It didn’t take me a real long® to get over that feeling.” Farn finds in bi ROCKDA years ago, never tasted said he had popular dark Today, the has achieved in Milam Co munity as thi County Ay said Luetge commercial within a 100 tral Texas. Luetge’s a< vegetable car ment conduc ricultural Ex “If it hac people, I we what it was,’ stood amid a high broccoli Luetge, v image of the can farmer, s iment with a one prolific farming eff< vegetable as; remains of 1 mer gardens “He alway toes, corn a the spring, a nip greens ii Johnson of with the ag service’s Inti ning Prograi “But there i tween Octol where most s come. Luetge fill void with bn McCutche equally sue flower, but t of that veg( consuming. 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