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About The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current | View Entire Issue (March 31, 1915)
Published every Wednesday night by Students of the Agricultural and Mechanical College of Texas Subscription price $1.25 per year. Advertising rates on application. : -Member of Texas Collegiate Press Association. FRESHMAN STAFF. Editor-in-Chief—Gillam, F. L. Assistant Editors—Anderson, Ed wards, H. K.; Kenan, W.; Singleton, D. E. ^ Business Manager—Mason, H. M. Assistant Manger—Boetcher, “Sky” Associate Manager—Ferrell, Sam. Cartoonists—Ford; Schmidt, W. M.: Von Rosenberg, W. E.; Royder. CollegeStation Tex., March 31, 1915. All material for publiication should be signed and turned in not later than Monday night. Entered as second-class matter at College Station, Texas, February 17, 1905. GREETING. The custom is for the Freshman class to edit the “Bat” once each year, and following this custom, we give you this issue. It is ready for your criticism whether it be commendation or condemnation. We know that it contains no scholarly literature, no articles which a Harvard professor would likely approve. But we, the editors, have tried to put forth an issue which is characteristic of the “Fish” class of 1918. If this edition has any good quali ties, don’t overlook them, but if you find bad ones, just consider the source. Say, “Well, he’s a ‘Fish.’ ” TRUTH AND FICTION. In olden times it was the custom for the accused to walk on red hot iron without scorching his feet, or to sink in a river without being drowned, in order to prove his innocence. I have always understood that a person must ride a goat before he joins a lodge. Likewise, it is a general belief that a Freshman at this college endures end less tortures and personal humiliations without number before he gains the right to call himself a Sophomore and to make life miserable for unfortunate “fish.” I live less than a thousand miles from one of the best institutions of learning in Texas—in fact, so near that the boys who graduate from the Mgh school never think of going to any other college. And when I exprest my intention of coming to A. and M. Col lege I was repeatedly told of the gauntlet I would have to run before returning home among “civilized” peo ple, and that I had better gi with my classmates to what was called “a good place.” I was told that the stu dents of the A. and M. College were little short of desperadoes, and that all drank, smoked, gambled, and cursed like sailors. It was firmly imprest up on some of us that hazing was partic ularly favored by those at the head of the college, and many tales were told of what had been done to Freshmen in the past. I arrived at College Station Septem ber 22nd, almost beleieving that I would be tossed off the Main Building and .caught .in. a blanket pr whipped until I could not sit down. I walked from the depot toward Leggett Hall, and every step my heart sank lower and lower. When I reached the hall, a Sophomore told meto salute, and salute I did.. That night as a “fish” was labori ously speaking on “Woman Suffrage,” the table on which he stood was jerk ed from under him. He then had to put his nose on the nose of another “fish,” and at the count of three, one had to whistle “Home, Sweet Home.” There was so much discord that one of the “fish” had to try the song again, substituting the lettering on a tobacco can for the words of the song. The above, I think is the worst that hap pened to any of the Freshmen, even tho I did attempt to sing “O Bury Me Not On the Lone Prairie,” and as I started to sing another song, the mas ter of ceremonies kindly informed me that my education had been sadly neglected. On the 23rd some Sophomores col lected about two dozen of the Fresh men and for half an hour there was yell practice which we heartily en joyed. As soon as the college opened and sentinels were posted, the “fish” were left to themselves and until this day I have seen no undue advantage taken of a Freshman except of his ignorance when he could be persuaded to get some “Reveille Oil” to guard the flag pole, or some other fool thing. The longer I stay here and the more I learn of the college, the more firmly I stand by President Bizzell in the talk he made on October 6, in which he said, “Boys, there has never been so many lies told about anything in the United States as there has been about A. & M.” WE TOOT OUR OWN HORN. Since no one will toot our horn for us, we will toot it ourselves. Through out this issue of the Battalion you shall read about the greatness of the “fish.” No one seemed to be inclined to let the world know of the greatness of our class, so we take advantage of this issue of the “Bat” to boast of our classmates to the “Old Boys,” and to the outside readers of the “Bat.” “He that braggeth let alone,” is a quotation often repeated by philo sophers. This piece of advice is ad vocated by many and practiced by few. But we, the editors of the “Fish Bat,” hold that it is right and legiti mate for this issue of the “Bat” to show the outside world the greatness of the members of our class. “Who is Who” among the “slimes,” Is something hard to tell, For every “slime” at most all times Has done his duty well. But as democracy needs a leader. As the universe needs a God, So do the “slimes” need a genius Who can yield a mighty rod. Did you ever see him, Or did you see his “T”? The greatest “slime” at A. & M.—• Now—who—can—that—be? “Why, Brooks, of course,” you say; For no one can deny That he is the man of the day. Who is surely going high. In athletics and in class, He has shown true nervy vim. And now he leads the “slimy” mass Which is the pride of A. & M. But as Caesar needed two more men To make the mighty trio, So did Brooks, before he began To be our greatest hero. And from the multitude of “fish” We sent Read to his side, And Brooks’ greatest wish Was then gratified. Then came Mason and “Sky,” Who run the business part. For Mason has a business eye And ‘“Sky,” a business heart. But I failed to relate Facts that are well known About others, who are great. But there just isn’t room. But “Who is Who,” is every one, For aren’t we all “right there?” And who knows what “son of a gun” Will rise up high next year? Up with our beautiful ’18; We are “pippins” to the core. And isn’t this “Bat” a dream—• Could we ask for any more? Goodbye, old doubt and fears. You’ve failed; now make way For more progress during the years That we are going to stay. —JOE WILSON, T8. PARODY ON “IT'S A LONG WAY TO TIPPERARY.” Up to College Station came a country boy one day; All they did was study, so no one there was gay. Went out to the college and looked them over.there,. Sat right down and write right home. Said, People, on the square, I’m a long way from tipsy, mother, I have ten more drinks to go. I’m a long way, my darling mother, From the nearest bar I know. All the Profs, are playing poker, Charles E. wants my “dough.” It’s a long, long way to whiskey, mother, But just watch me go. —M. M. POTTER. Fish Rogers on a Math. 2 quiz, sign ed this pledge: I have neither given, received nor done anything. R. M. VICK CONFECTIONERY When in town try one of our MALTED MILKS ■ Ice cream, cold drinks and fresh home-made candy. Bryan, Texas. Hardy Newton “Everything to Eat" Bryan, Texas FINAL BALL ELECTION. The following officers were elected for the final ball: President—C. J. Davis. Chairman arrangement committee— O. W. Greene. Chairman program committee — F. Cawthorn. Chairman reception committee — P. T. Crown. Chairman decoration committee—J. P. Garrity. Chairman finance committee—W. K. Hanson. Chairman floor committee — A. C. Bull. Fish Von—Red, do you know the dif ference between our interurban and the city cars? Red Willet—Ain’t they just alike? Von—No. You see, in the city the motorman and the conductor wear uni forms and the passengers wear “cits.,” while on this interurban the motorman and conductor wear “cits.” and the passengers wear, uniforms. •» ■a- «• Compliments LAWRENCE GROCERY COMPANY •» Bryan, Texas •Cl- •ct -a- o «• «- t o o- -& •a- £!>!>$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$<!£ $$$$$$$$$$