THE BATTALION
THE BATTALION
Published every Friday night by the students of the Agricultural and
Mechanical College of Texas.
Subscription Price $1.75 per Year.
Advertising rates on application.
Member Texas Collegiate Press Association.
ALL ADS RUN UNTIL ORDERED OUT.
STAFF.
Frank L. Bertschler Editor-in-Chief.
W. T. Strange Associate Editor
C. R. Warndof Assistant Editor
D. J. Finn Assistant Editor
C. C. B. Warden. Contributing Editor.
M. P. Mims News Editor
J. T. Rollins Sport Editor.
M. B. Gardner Assistant Sports Editor
C. Blumenthal Exchange Editor.
W. W. Cox Social Editor.
C. W. Thomas Assistant Editor.
G. A. Denison Staff Photographer
Mrs. A. T. Potts Campus Editor
Miss Nell Pryor Assistant Campus Editor
Bill King Business Manager.
F. P. Buie Circulation Manager.
S. C. Evans Assistant Circulation Manager.
Entered as second-class matter at College Station, Texas, Feb. 17, 1905.
EULOGY OF THE DOG.
Which Deeply Affected a Crowded Court Room and Quickly Brought a Verdict
for the Owner of a Faithful Dog That Had Been Poisoned.
By SENATOR VEST OF MISSOURI.
Gentlemen of the Jury—The best friend a man has in this world may
turn against him and become his enemy. His son or daughter that he has
reared with loving care may prove ungrateful. Those who are nearest and
dearest to us, those whom we trust with our happiness and our good name,
may become traitors to their faith. The money that man has he may lose. It
flies away from him, perhaps when he needs it most. A man’s reputation may
be sacrificed in a moment of ill-considered action. The people who are prone
to fall on their knees to do us honor when success is with us may be the first
to throw the stone of malice when failure settles its cloud upon our heads.
The one absolute unselfish friend that man can have in this selfish world, the
one that never deserts him, the one that never proves ungrateful or treach
erous, is his dog.
Gentlemen of the Jury, a man’s dog stands by him in prosperity and in
poverty, in health and in sickness. He will sleep on the cold ground, where
the wintry winds blow and the snow drives fiercly, if only he can be near his
master’s side. He will kiss the hand that has no food to offer, he will lick the
wounds and sores that come in encounter with the roughness of the world.
He guards the sleep of his pauper master as if he were a prince. When all
other friends desert he remains. When riches take wings and reputation falls
to pieces he is as constant in his love as the sun in its journey through the
heavens. If fortune drives the master forth an outcast in the world, friend
less and homeless, the faithful dog asks no higher privilege than that of ac
companying him to guard against danger, to fight against his enemies, and
when the last scene of all comes, and death takes the master in his embrace
and his body is laid away in the cold ground, no matter if all other friends
pursue their way, there by his graveside will the noble dog be found, his head
between his paws, his eyes sad but open in alert watchfulness, faithful and
true even to death.
,
With the thought of the recent brutal and unpardonable attacks upon
the dogs of the Campus we publish the above selection relative to this canine
friend of man. Some of the outrages in way of inhuman and cruel mangling
of Campus dogs have been criminal in nature and the perpetrators, whoever
they may be, fully entitled to the most severe penalties the law provides.
There is a ruling at College Station that no stray dogs be allowed on the
Campus. Hence such dogs as we generally see are owned and cared for by
some local resident. Other dogs should be killed instantly or disposed of by
some humane method. The recent outrages of which the treatment of the
beautiful collie owned by Sergeant Brittain, night watchman, is an exam
ple, should be traced to the guilty party and just punishment meted him. The
dog in question is well known by Campus people and cadets. Each night
he strolled the Military Walk with his master in the long hours of watch
fulness. So far as we have been able to learn, he has never made his presence
undesired. Two other dogs have also been cruelly mangled and left to die
from loss of blood unless some friend discovered them or the natural canine
instincts caused them to creep to the Veterinary Hospital where they might
receive attention. There is reason for most things but this is one instance
when a purely malicious desire to hurt and injure seems to have been the
origin of such attacks. We cannot believe that any man we meet face to face
in the daily routine of college life could be guilty of such deeds and we deem
it well worth investigation.
‘Y” EXTENDS THANKS.
To every person, who in any way
whatever assisted in making a suc
cess of the Texas Older Boys’ Y. M.
C. A. Convention held on our cam
pus last Friday, Saturday and Sun
day, the staff of the local “Y” wishes
to extend a deep and heartfelt word
of appreciation.
As Dr. Selecman said regarding
the stokers on the ocean steamer, the
hundreds of students and campus
people who in small but sincers and
helpful ways made the delegates ap
preciate the spirit of A. and M. as
it shows itself on the every day life
are responsible for the success of the
conference.
The campus people and students
who gave of their time so unselfish
ly, can not but feel conscious of the
appreciation which the Staff of the
Y. M. C. A. of the A. and M. College
desires to express.
Never have we experienced such
cooperation and when we may serve
any other department of the college
or any individual in any way, please
command us.
Y. M. C. A. STAFF.
SCHOOL SCANDAL.
Appearances are deceitful. Who
would suspect that good, staid, ven
erable old Dr. Mark Francis cuts up
more in class than the most facetious
freshman? For the good of his
class he occasionally gets a ram.
* * *
On the sly — don’t mention it to
the income tax collector—Prof La
Roche, head of the architectural de
partment, 'draws more than Dr. Biz-
zell.
* 5^ *
Dean Puryear is not as old as he
looks—he still studies curves and
besides teaching them has corrected
many bad figures.
* * *
Although the Eighteenth Amend
ment is a thing of the past. Dr.
Hedges, head of the chemistry de-
parment, still keeps a few quartz on
the shelf.
* * *
We don’t like to talk about Dean
Kyle but really there is more graft
ing in the agriculture department
than in any other branch of the col
lege. That department also pro
duces more nuts than all others com
bined.
* * *
Dr. Fermier may sure enough turn
red when we publish to the masses
that he teaches—well not exactly
the doctrines of Bolshevism but most
of his teachings are of a revolution
ary nature.
* ❖ *
Dr. Bolton is not exactly lazy but
he does like light work. His ohm
life is very ergs-ohm (irksome).
* * *
Dr. Bizzell, in his report to the
Legislature, made the startling ac
cusation that the C. E. Department,
headed by Jimmy Nagle, had drain
ed the college.
. sis
Scandal prevails in local social
circles and garrulous busy-bodies are
agog with gossip. Ike Ashburn re
cently took a Cook to the Bachelor’s
dance.
A few doses 666 break a cold.
+ + + + + +
* *
♦ STUDENT OPINION. *
❖ *
Should the Infantry Summer Camp
be Changed?
This question came up at the meet
ing of the Infantry corps last Friday
and there is a division of opinion on
the subject.
The idea is this—Some of the stu
dents want the camp to begin im
mediately after the expiration of the
present term so as to have a longer
vacation without being interrupted
by having to report for the camp.
This seems to be a logical plan at
first thought but we must consider
the effect that it would have on the
student body and the college as a
whole.
The first and most serious objec
tion to this plan lies in the fact that
the Civil Engineering students have
a three weeks field practice period
after the regular session is over. To
go to camp immediately after the
term is over would necessitate the
changing of the C. E. field practice
period to a later date. The only
time that sould be substituted is the
three weeks just proceeding the Fall
term of next year. That would
work a hardship on the Civil Engi
neering department for several rea
sons. First, the instructors in that
department are under contracts that
expire on the first of September. The
field practice would have to start on
the 25th of August in order to finish
by the time that the Fhll term would
begin. Thus we see that the instruc
tors would be asked to report for one
weeks work and then their contract
would expire. These instructors will
be working for private concerns and
will not be able to report here for
duty without seriously inconven
iencing themselves. Then the whole
teaching staff would have to be
changed in the midst of the work and
this would cause delay and get things
mixed up in general.
The summer work is based on the
theory of the preceding term. The
student can derive more good and
handle his work better in May while
the theory is fresh in his memory
than he can in August at which time
he will have become more or less
negligent in the courses taught.
All the other students will have a
months vacation before going to
camp. Things around home will set
tle down to the every day routine
and a vacation in Colorado will be
appreciated so much or more so then
in May.
INTERCOLLEGIATE PRESS.
(Via Radio)
Preparation is under way for the
presentation of a Pagent during the
first week of May. The election of
the Queen will take place next week
under the supervision of the Wo
man’s Council. Dr. Stockton Axson,
Professor of English Literature will
edit the theme of the spectacle. The
theme will deal with the history of
Rice up to the present day. The
program of the Eighth Southern In
tercollegiate Architectural Competi
tion has just been received here and
preliminaries are now being made.
Soph: “Which is correct, a herd
of camels or a flock of camels?”
Senior: “Neither—a pack of
camels.”
■»$*- , $* ,, ^-*J*-»!f*4$*-«$**J**J*-*ft-»$*-*$*-*!j? , *$* , *$* , *J*-«i$*
❖ «$•
❖ STRANGE TO SAY ❖
* *
According to a newspaper report,
Tatsukori Naito, the worlds greatest
jiu jitsu artist has completed a course
in agriculture at Penn State and in
tends to farm. We wonder if he
will rent or, in keeping with his pro
fession, buy some of his lands.
❖ * *
J. A. (Reg) Walker showed very
plainly in Dallas Christmas that he
was a country boy. In fact, he was
so turned around that he was arrest
ed for being A. J. Walker.
* * *
We don’t know which insect pos
sesses the worst temper but we have
seen the bees wax hot.
* ^
General Strickland says the Irish
women carry weapons in their skirts.
How in the world would they ever
be able to find them in an emer
gency?—Houston Post.
Well, George, if the General would
look around on this side of the ditch
he might see most of our gilds bare
arms. Too bad some of them are
not covered by revolvers.
* * *
Stock Exchange Report—“Rice
dropped 35 points last Saturday
week. Farmers held Rice and clean
ed up.”
* * ❖
In a recent undertaker’s publica
tion it was stated that the art of
embalming, attained by the Egyp
tians, is a lost art. As underwriters,
we agree that embalming is a dead
art.
A MIDNIGHT GAME.
The football game was over and
before the parlor grate,
A maiden and a man were linger
ing rather late.
They talked of punts and passes.
Things which were rather tame.
Till Cupid put on his noseguard,
and butted in the game.
He lined that couple up;
Then made them toe the mark.
Soon he had them going
With a scrimmage in the dark.
As they sat there in silence
In their new found bliss,
The man thought the scrimmage
Ought to end with a kiss.
Thereupon he trfed one.
An amateurish affair,
But he lost it on a fumble,
And instead, it hit the air.
The next he landed on her ear
And the maid did slily say:
“You’re penalized for holding,
Jim;
Likewise for off-side play.”
Fiercely he tried another,
This time succeeding fine,
For he made a touchdown
On that warm, red five-yard
line.
As they sat there in silence,
Communing soul to soul,
The parlor door swung open,
And father kicked a goal.
—Exchange.
Guy Boyett’s Store
NORTH OF CAMPUS NEAR INTERURBAN
HERE FOR THIRTY YEARS—OLDEST AT THE BUSI
NESS BUT LIVER THAN EVER BEFORE
Tobaccos of all Kinds
STATIONERY
Toilet Articles
GIVE US A CALL AND TRY OUR SERVICE
•» »2a •%« «%> o|b af«
l C* S. Martin
MEAT MARKET
Fresh Meats, Fish, Oysters,
Eggs, Butter. Delivery
leaves for College every
morning at 9 o’clock except
Sunday.
2—PHONES—471
Us
[❖ *
BRYAN TIRE & REPAIR |
COMPANY
H. G. Umland, Prop.
Tires, Tubes, Gasoline, Oils
and All Kinds of Vul
canizing
CALL ON
F. R. HANDS
At Boyett’s Store for
HAMBURGERS—The Juicy Kind
lOLD BRINGS, CHEWING GUM,
CANDY, ETC.
Come Down, Boys, and Get
Acquainted
-** «ga
a. McKenzie |
WATCHES and JEWELRY ^
Pathe and Claxtonola Talking
Machines
Cadets are invited to call and
X see our lines
* i
*
TCSTING|
FREE
JNO. S. CALDWELL
Graduate Optometrist and
Optician
Office: Caldwell’s Jewelry
Store
❖
*
JAMES W. JAMES
REAL ESTATE
Post Office Block, Bryan