NEWS
THE BATTALIO
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Aggielife
The Battalion
Page 3 • Wednesday, February 19, 2003
A match made in tradition
In some cultures, arranged marriages are a way of life
By Nishat Fatima
THE BATTALION
In in western society, the exciting phe
nomenon of marriage is simple—you meet
somebody, hit it off, date for a while, and
then in a beautiful, rosy ceremony,
exchange vows. For most, that’s how the
journey to marital bliss goes. But in many
cultures overseas and in the United
States, the road to finding your soul
mate can be very different. The
method of arranged marriages is still
practiced today and remains one of
the biggest cultural mysteries.
Zahir Latheef, a sophomore com
puter science major, grew up in a
typical Indian Muslim household
where arranged marriages are com
monplace. His parents and older broth
ers were all wed through the arranged
marriage process.
“It is a common misconception that
arranged marriages are forced upon indi
viduals and they are given no other alter
native, but in modem day cases, there are
two conceding parties,” he said. “This is
the only way that the marriage can reach
its full potential.”
Latheef said that in many cases, the
individuals get to know each other
before the actual marriage takes place.
“Since it is a very foreign aspect to
many people, the practice is looked
upon as something that is backward
and demeaning, but that really isn’t
the case,” he said. “Arranged
marriages make it easier on
people who choose not
to date for one reason
or another. It is assumed that you don't know the person or anything
about them before the marriage, but depending on the culture, there is
acourtship period where the couple can get to know each other
tough modest and limited means,-such as phone or e-mail.”
Latheef said religion and culture play an important role in how
isociety performs arranged marriages.
GRAPHICS BY BECKY MAIDEN • THE BATTALION
“Cultures that are more family-oriented and traditional have
more occurrences of arranged marriages. In our faith, marriage is
based on a common purpose in life, and a commitment to one
another. It is for a deep principle that remains constant throughout
one's lifetime,” he said. “This is why arranged marriages are cho
sen, to avoid getting caught up in superficial aspects of the other
individual.”
Ryan Turley, a senior nuclear engineering major, said arranged
marriages sacrifice the theory of the personal right to choose.
“Everybody should have the option of going through an elimi
nation process to find a spouse, because that's the only way they
can find out for sure what they want out of a relationship,” he said.
“When people are culturally bound to have an arranged marriage,
they have to sacrifice their personal freedom, just to stay within the
confines of social requirements.”
Turley said that although arranged marriages are not a part of the
typical western life, they are quickly being popularized through
reality television such as “The Bachelorette” and “Joe Millionaire.”
“There are a lot of similarities in the shows and the process of
arranged marriage, because they are having courtship for the pur
pose of getting married, and they don't necessarily know the person
very well,” he said. “At the same time, it is also different, because
there isn't any third-party involvement, and they still have the free
dom to choose for themselves who they think will be their best
match.”
Professor of sociology Dr. Vivien Chen said reality TV shows
such as “The Bachelorette” are not necessarily an indication that
western society is warming up to the idea of marrying somebody
relatively alien.
“People find such shows appealing because events like that
don't occur in real life,” she said. “After the shows are over, the
couples may not always end up marrying and the whole process is
much like regular western courtship.”
Chen said that from a sociological point of view the end results
from all types of marriages are the same.
“The general social pattern remains the same regardless of how
the couple was married. There is a tendency to think that arranged
marriages are more restrictive because social class is a big factor
for proposals,” she said. “But even in modem courtship it is
uncommon for people to marry a great extent above or below their
own social class.”
As a native of China, Chen said the concept of arranged mar
riage is not new to her.
“Historically it was the norm in China to have your family
choose a spouse for you,” she said. “Today, as Chinese society has
become more modernized and individual-focused, there are fewer
instances of arranged marriages in urban areas, although it remains
the norm in rural areas.”
Chen said that ultimately, mar
riage and culture are interrelated.
“In some cultures marriage
works in favor of the men, such as
in Chinese culture many years
ago. Arranged marriage is very
relevant to the culture and the con
text that is being considered,” she
said. “The status of women in the
particular culture is also signifi
cant because in some cultures
women still do not have a
choice in who they marry.”
Tyckie Avery, a junior corporate law
major at the University of Houston, said
even though she grew up in a traditional
Catholic family, she would prefer to
have an arranged marriage rather than
dealing with the risks of dating.
“I think having an arranged marriage
would be a lot easier than having to
deal with the dating process,” she said.
“Both parties are ready and willing for
the lifelong commitment, and they
already know what they want from
the union.”
Avery said she came to this con
clusion after experiencing the rela
tionship process firsthand.
“My friends and I would
always be facing some trivial issue
because of the relationships that we were in. On the contrary, I had
some friends that chose to have arranged marriages who said they
were content in their relationships,” she said. “I could almost see
why they felt that way — they didn't have any unnecessary bad
history with their spouse, no unexpected surprises, and less chance
of heartbreak. They started with a clean slate and could therefore
be themselves.”
Avery said that no matter how you get mamed, ultimately the
same things are needed to keep the relationship going.
“Regardless of whether or not you know your spouse very well,
a lot of compromise and patience is needed to make a marriage
work,” she said. “Different people have different ways to do it, but
in the end, it‘s all about holding on to the commitment you have to
the other person.”
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121MAN 2n4 s P Hn 9
Gene^l Meeting
COME HEAR COACH
JOHNSON AND THE AGGIE
BASEBALL PLAYERS TALK
ABOUT WHAT’S IN STORE
FOR THIS SEASON.
*00* when: Wed. February 19th, 2003 ^
Where: The Zone Lobby
Time: 7:00 pm
V/
nth Annual
Baseball BBQ
Join us for goo4 foocj 3n4 fun!
When: Febuary 21,2003
Where: Olsen Pavilion
4pm-6pm
$5 (for non-members)
EYERY0NE IS WELCOME!
Time:
Cost:
flail IOth Annual flail
Texas Film Festival
SCHEDULE FOR WEDNESDAY, FEB 19
S:oo Look Again Shorts Program
(Dr. Cuddle, Fueling the Fire, Face of
the Enemy, Move)
yjoo Unprecedented
A slice into the old battle scars
of the aooo Election complete
with misleading ballots, hired
gUgf g uns * an d political racism.
8:oo The Utopian Society
The stroy of 6 college students
form different backgrounds,
who are assigned to a work on a
final project, although they
can’t standi each other.
A daily schedule will be
printed in each Battalion this
week. A full schedlue and
more detailed descriptions of
all our films can be found at
txfUmfest.tamu.edu.
Thursday Preview
Aggie Shorts
Program
5:00
Rudder Theater
A collection of 4 shorts created
by Aggies on campus.
Tickets can be bought at
Rudder Box Office
(979) 845-1234
Visa, Mastercard,
Aggie Bucks Accepted
Trapped in a maximum security
insane asylum, a girl must
escape not only psychological
demons but a band of killers
determined to silence her
forever.
t.iJ'J'Vomen
> In
Itme
Friday, February 28 th , 2003
Duncan Dining Hall
11:30 - 1:30 pm
featuring
DCcuren JCaise r CCccrfi
Karen Kaiser Clark is a world-renowned consultant,
educator and lecturer. She is also a best-selling author
of three books on perception, maintaining balance and
growing through change.
For more information about Women In Time
and for reservations, please visit
fa, He/pus
«£s'eT Week ° f
www.tamu.edu/womenintime