Like their coach, Aggies
holding onto the past
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I t’s that time of year again, when thoughts turn to the holidays
and the ones we love. It’s also time for the Longhorns to
remind our surly backward cousins who dominates Texas
football. Despite leading the all-time series 68-34-5, the Aggies
have made the mistake of declaring the Longhorns their rival.
The game always has been circled on the
respective teams’ schedules, but this rivalry
really heated up some 80 years ago. After being
edged by Dana X. Bible’s Aggies in 1919, a
team that allowed no points all season, the
Longhorns were out for blood. 20,000 people,
the most ever to watch a game in the state of
Texas at the time, showed up to watch the Horns
knock off the Aggies. Since then, there is no
doubt that the University of Texas-Texas A&M
.81
grudge match is among the best college football rivalries.
Perhaps one of the more memorable games in the series
occurred in 1999 when the Aggies beat the Horns in front of an
emotional crowd in a game dedicated to 12 Aggies who lost their
lives in the 1999 Aggie Bonfire collapse. The Horns could not
escape the number 12 that day as the Aggie 12th Man literally
willed its team to a victory. In the wake of the tragedy, our
schools put down their differences long enough to appreciate our
similarities and strengths. The tragedy reminded us all that the
bonds of human emotion and suffering are stronger than any
rivalry can break.
That was then, this is now.
As A&M is steadily out-recruited by TCU, perhaps Texas fans
should just start focusing on Oklahoma as their main rival. With
your affinity for mixing it up with Red Raiders, coupled with your
inability to actually beat them, the Red Raiders seem like a perfect
match for you. Just make sure not to loiter around too long in
Jones Stadium after your next defeat in Lubbock.
After whining about Tech fans for a week, it shouldn’t be a
surprise that the main thugs in Lubbock were Aggies. You all
have an affinity for scofflaws and general law-breakers. The
1 pride and joy of A&M, Gov. Rick Perry, recently danced with
snakes and praised Jesus with some east Texas schoolchildren —
filled with so much good of boy spirit, he decided to shirk the
U.S. Constitution and some key Supreme Court case law. Then
there’s the legendary Jackie “Moneybags” Sherril — who
made sure the only streak of A&M victories against UT came
while your team was on the school payroll.
To counter the tumbleweeds and large bovine population in
College Station, A&M officials wisely have crafted numerous
traditions to trick students into attending every year.
Part of your exhaustive collection of cute traditions
includes the rather macabre ritual known as the Elephant
Walk, or, since only seniors can say the word “elephant,” the
“E-Walk.” The Elephant Walk involves seniors taking a last
walk around campus to symbolize their dying usefulness to the
student body, like an elephant wandering off to die. Perhaps the
Aggie coaching staff could join in the next Elephant Walk to sym-
Besides, if we wanted to watch a bunch of yokels
cruise a one-light town, we would watch the
“Dukes of Hazzard”
bolize their dying usefulness to Texas football so that sometime in
the post-R.C. era, you Aggies will behold the wonder that is the
forward pass. In the meantime, you can watch Chris Simms use it
on your secondary, much like last year — just don’t strain your
neck.
For those not in to football, take heart. A&M recently was voted
the seventh most “male-friendly” college in the nation according to
Playgirl ...er. Men’s Health magazine.
So call all your Aggie friends in Austin — there are probably more
Aggies here than there — and tell them to get fired up, or to Gig ’Em
or whatever it is you all do. Because it’s not every day you can have
the honor of getting romped by a team as exciting as Texas.
And if you miss the game, don’t worry. You can always catch a
replay on that collection of Super 8 videos ESPN calls “Sidelines.”
Although, it’s so bad. I’m not sure anyone in College Station is even
watching it. Besides, if we wanted to watch a bunch of yokels cruise
a one-light rural town, we would watch the “Dukes of Hazzard.”
Marshall Maher is editor of The Daily Texan and
a senior journalism major.
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