y\OWD y. 2000 IVE EV^ Come by Rudder Fountain Monday Feb. 28 & join us for Howdy Week 2000 Kickoff! The festivities begin at 10a.m. with Appearances by: The Aggie Wranglers Revielle • Yell Leaders And don't forget free cookies and balloons! A dynamic, humorous and candid video series on LOVE, SEX, MARRIAGE AND ROMANCE. featuring: Tommy Nelson Single, dating, engaged, or married, Tommy will cover God's design for romantic relationships. Mondays, February 7 - March 20: 7:00 - 8:15 p.m.; 2/7,2/14,2/21:229 MSC 2/28:707 Rudder 3/6:292A MCA 3/20:402 Rudder sponsored by F.O.C.U.S. - First Baptist, C.S. arms- T25S Uni\/&rGity TICKETS GO ON SALE MONDAY 3PM PHYS Wmm PHYS 218 CHEM 102 PHYS 208 Gene 301 Chem 227 FINC 6-10PM SUN Ch.20,21,22 4-6PM MON Review & Prac Test SUN Feb 27 6-8 PM 8-10 PM 10PM- MID 6-8 PM 8 10PM SUN Chem 228 Ch.21A 10PM- MID 6-8 PM 8-10 PM 341 MON Feb 28 Ch.3 Ch.17 Ch.25 Chem 101 Ch. 10 8 10PM Chem 228 Ch.20 Chem 237 Lat> tOPM Mlt) MbK» Review TUES Feb 29 Ch.4 Ch.18A Ch.26 Chem101 Ch. 11A 8-10PM Chem 228 Test #1 Pennington Part I Part I Feb 29 TUE 7 -10PM Part I Part II Part II Mar 1 WED 7 -10PM Part II WED Mar 1 Ch.5 Ch.18B Ch.27 Math 141 Part I Chem102 Ch.20 Phys 201 Ch.1,2 Part III Part Mar 2 THR 7-9PM Part III THUR Mar 2 Ch.6 & Prac Test Ch.19 Ch.28 Math 141 Part II Chem 102 Ch.TBA Phys 201 Ch.2,3 Part IV Part IV Mar 5 SUN 7-0PM Part IV .HOB WANT 10 Sf MILLIONAIRE Play In the million dollar hole in one contest during the ‘Kappa ‘Defta Sorority SftamrockjEvznt March 4,2000 Rain date: March 5,2000 The contest begins© 9AM Lone Star Golf Academy Located on the East Bypass between Harvey Road and Southwest Parkway (across from the main Proceeds benefit Twin City Mission's Sheltering Arms Prelect and Prevent Child Abuse America Tickets are available this week in the Rudder Fountain/MSC area or from any Kappa Delta. WEWAHTYOHTOBEA AGGIELIFE Page 4 THE BATTALION Monday, February 20 In pursuit of recruits V.S. armed forces resort to new tactics, incentives to get today's wary youth to join militat] F or many young people an enticing al ternative to college loans was the na tion’s military. Who wouldn’t want to be in the rib-tickling ranks of television’s “M.A.S.H.,” the low-key antics of “MeHale’s Navy,” or the witty banter of “Corner Pyle?” The good life: snappy dialogue, zany schemes and canned laughter! But, as it so happens, today’s youth are above such obvious ploys. Today, young adults have the capacity to deter mine which of the media’s messages are true and which are merely fabricat ed nonsense. This is where the coy, yet bungling, beast of burden known as “the recruiter” comes in. The recruiter’s job is to con vince individuals that the military is not only a potential career boost, but also a great way to “pick up chicks.” In a way, the military recruiter is a salesman, per forming a pre-planned pitch to potential consumers. Among his repertoire of make-ygu-sign-up-fast-right-now gim micks, the recruiter uses the gaudy bauble of “incentives.” What many do not know is that in centives vary from one branch of the military to the next. Tie Marines? Bad haircut. The Navy? “No-quease” pills. And for the Coast Guard? All the seized booty you could want! And seized booty is the best booty! And who could forget the hazing! The wonderful, won derful hazing! But even the primitive slings and ar rows of incentives cannot compete with the sharp minds and short attention spans of today’s youth. The military has real ized that in order to reach their intended audience, they must have an appealing image. Consequently, the Air Force is undergoing a complete image-renovation due to the plummeting number of re cruits. The Air Force wants a more “au dience-specific” slogan rather than the uniform, sterile “Aim High, Air Force.” Some suggestions have included, for the hippies: “Get High, Air Force,” for the lazies, “We Fly, So You Don’t Have To Walk”and for the junkies, “Air Force, Home of the In-Flight Movie.” The military is also encouraging the idea of “job skills” acquired by signing up for service. After all, nothing will get one farther up the ladder like blowing away the top half. Recruiters have come to realize that in order to ensure contact with young people, they have to hit them where they live, by phone! Military tele-recruiting is a delicate science; it requires both preci sion timing and dogged persistence. The result? High-school students everywhere you called, stay on the line, and a repre sentative will yell at you shortly. Due to the recruitment policy’s re cent changes regarding inquiries into personal lifestyle, the standard recruit ment application form has been simpli- JEFF SMITH/The Battalion getting a call at the exact moment they sit to surf the Web for pornography. Knowing the right person to call is also an important factor in effective re cruiting. Tie military keeps watch of po tential recruits via our nation's vast satel lite network. And you thought we launched a $3 billion rocket so you could watch “ALF” reruns. Once in a blue moon, the unthinkable happens: a young person will actually want to be recruited without having had any instigation or incentive. For such times, there is the 24-hour military hot line: 1 -800-GET-SHOT For anyone in terested in the hotline, a transcript of the number’s recorded message follows: Tiank you for calling the military tele-recruitment hotline. If you are inter ested in being recruited, press one. If your ranch is being shelled by artillery and you would like to file a complaint, press two. If you are unsure as to why tied to a minimum of two questions. They are as follows: 1. Name: 2. Sexual Preference: (note: this is optional. If recmit chooses not to answer, proceed to supplemental recruit informa tion section) Supplemental Question 1: Do you have good taste in furniture? 2. Did you enjoy “Cats?” 3. Do you own leather pants? 4. Did you consider the movie “Funny Girl" to be an excellent romantic-comedy? Questionnaires (French for “paper with words and then blanks after them”) often deter young people from becoming enthusiastic about a commitment to the service. When confronted with a ques tionnaire, a sudden pressure is felt —a pulsating, irritating motion from within, provoking one to panic, then to act irra tionally and finally to dump the whole burden altogether. Tils is caused either by questionnaires or double-bean bin- tos. What young people need to realm that there are proper and improper an swers when faced with a recruitmenl questionnaire. For example: Q: Are you satisfied with yourcim choice of career? A: (proper) Well, I would likeal more variety in my career. A: (improper) Well, it’s not people. And that’s what 1 wasr looking for. Q: Would you consider a career in i nation’s military? A: (proper) As long as i'lnstati® at Lake Titicaca or Bikini Atoll. A: (improper) No thanks, rmmui tcxi busy with the militia. Q: Would you like toreceiveal brochure and pen in the mail tm your local recruitment center? A: (proper) Do 1 get the brochure and the pen? A: (improper)Neinl After all die salespitchs rejuvenated images and trend) slogans, the grand question thatrs- mains is this: Is there truly any diffe cnee between the recruit’s ideal arm) and the army’s ideal recruit? Perhaps what the greenest of youth want is an institution based on reward and adventure rather than sacrifice and discipline. Perhaps what the recruiter wants is the bewildered youth with a head full of manufactured promisesani impossible ideals. Recruitment is not inherently all bad; actually, it is the only way toeet new components for die clanking ma chine that has served to protect our lam for so long. So what if the Army lead: kids on by telling them that Anthrax shots are available only during happy hour at the military base? Ifit werenoi for a little deception on the partofUn- cle Sam long ago, the only service pee pie would have signed up forw’ould have been the KISS Army. But who knows? The war could be over before it can even begin. 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TEXAS AVE, No EXPERIENCE REQUIRE^ MSC I ♦‘a ...is now taking applications for both hungry minds and stomachs! Let us satisfy your famished minds occasionally throughout the semester with dynamic professors in a small, non-academic, relaxed, and family atmosphere. Students meet over a free dinner three times a semester to discuss meaningful topics from several disciplines. To participate, attend our informational on: Feb 28 at 5:30pm, Rudder 401 Or get an application from our website at... http://conversations.tamu.edu