STUDENT TRAVEL ON COLLEGE LIFE: YOU COULD START YOUR PAPER THE NIGHT BEFORE and still get your full three hours of sleep. kinko's Express Yourself.™ 690 FULL-COLOR COPIES Receive 8-1/2" 111” full- or self-serve copies on 24-lb. while bond for just 69* each. No limit Resizing costs extra Offer is limited to one coupon per customer Customer must relinquish coupon at time of purchase Coupon may not be reproduced and is not valid with other coupons, offers or discounts. Offer valid at time ot purchase only and may not be discounted or credited to past or future purchases. Products and services vary by location Coupon void where pro hibited or restricted by law No cash value. VALID AT KINKO'S LISTED LOCATION ONLY. kinko's' Expires 12/31/99 846-8721 509 UNIVERSITY DR. W. 24 HOURS/ 7 DAYS A WEEK • WWW.KINKOS.COM • 1-800-2-KINKOS Products end services vary by location.© 1999 Kinko's, Inc. Kinko's and Kinko's Express Yourself ore registered trademarks ot Kinko's Ventures, Inc. and are used by permission. All riqhts reserved. Kinko's requires written permission from the copyriqht holder In order to reproduce any copyrighted work Listen up, Ags... It’s almost hoops time. And it is time to start drawing your tickets to the first games of the 1999-2000 season. The good news is that when you get your ticket before the game, you know you have an excellent seat to watch the Aggies. Just take your sports card and your friends’ cards to Reed Arena, the MSC Box Office in Rudder Tower or the Athletic Ticket Office in G. Rollie White to pull your tickets for games. Reed Arena even has 30 minute parking right in front of the building for people buying tickets to basketball games and other events. It’s quick and easy. At present, you can walk up to the North Entrance to Reed Arena the night of the game, have your card swiped and receive a pretty good ticket. But if you are a little late getting to the game, there might be a short line. If you don’t like to stand in lines, just get your ticket ahead o time and walk right in. You don’t even have to wait for your friends—they will already have their tickets ri ght next to yours. It’s like getting football tickets except you can get tickets for everyone whose card you have. It works. Save this schedule for ticket distribution. See you at the games. Game Date Opponent Pickup Date W omen’s Fri., Nov. 12 Exhibition Now! Wed., Nov. 18 Miss. All Stars Now! Tue., Nov. 23 Sam Flouston Now! Sat.., Nov. 27 UT-Pan American Now! Fri.., Dec. 3 UT-San Antonio Mon., Nov. 15 Wed., Dec. 8 T ulane Mon., Nov. 15 Sat., Dec. 11 Jackson State Mon., Nov. 15 Sun., Dec. 19 TAMU-Corpus Christi Mon., Nov. 15 Sat., Jan. 8 Oklahoma State Mon., Nov. 29 Sat., Jan. 15 Kansas State Mon., Nov. 29 Wed., Jan. 26 Oklahoma Mon., Nov. 29 Sat., Jan. 29 Texas Tech Mon., Nov. 29 Wed., Feb. 9 Baylor Tues. Jan. 18 Wed., Feb. 16 Missouri Tues. Jan. 18 Wed., Feb. 23 Iowa State Tues. Jan. 18 Sat., Feb. 26 Texas Tues. Jan. 18 Men’s Thur., Nov. 11 Exhibition Now! Tue., Nov. 16 Exhibition Now! Sat., Nov. 27 North Carolina A&T Now! Wed., Dec. 1 Stephen F. Austin Mon., Nov. 15 Sun., Dec. 5 Va. Commonwealth Mon., Nov. 15 Wed., Jan 5 Centenary Mon., Nov. 15 Wed., Jan. 12 Texas Mon., Nov. 29 Mon., Jan. 17 Kansas Mon., Nov. 29 Sat., Jan. 22 Oklahoma State Mon., Nov. 29 Wed., Feb. 2 Baylor Tues., Jan. 18 Sat., Feb. 12 Colorado Tues., Jan.' 18 Sat., Feb. 19 Texas Tech Tues., Jan. 18 Wed., Mar. 1 Oklahoma Mon., Jan. 31 Sat., Mar. 4 Nebraska Mon. Jan. 31 Page 4 • Tuesday, October 26, 1999 A GGIELIFE t Battalion Asv Calling all Halloweenie Yett et Halloween participants must obey tradition during hoi Ai SC SAN ANTOI &te’s high scl iminates agan h, Hal loween. .A festive fandango of goblin giblets and sugared tidbits. Hal loween is the time of year at which tomfool ery is not only iy accepted but promoted. But Halloween is in danger of becoming the next on the list of seasonal celebrations that have fall en victim to corporate America. Halloween is quickly turning from a celebration of humanity tendency to meddle and mock into an ex ploitation of advertising's ability to peddle and hock. Fear not, Halloweenies. Hope is not lost. Consumers can take back their day of mischief and mayhem from the concrete clutches of cor porate conglomerates by ignoring the pitch and awe of commerce’s enticing waves and focusing in stead on the fundamentals that make Halloween a fun time of year. Costumes have been the staple ingredient of Halloween’s blend of chunky, cheeky chili for years. Of course, not everyone dresses up for Halloween, but if one does choose to do so, he or she should avoid falling victim to generic getups. No one wants to arrive at a party only to discover they have clones aplenty. Avoid this predicament by being aware that most costumes are de signed in the vein of horror. The most common, and therefore passe, costumes are those based on the stuff of myth and movie, cos tumes rooted in tales told to fright en young children from misbehav ior, such as Michael Jackson, Teletubbies and Woody Allen. Instead; impress party guests by greeting them at the door in a sim ple yet original and clever costume. Strip naked and go to the party as “Adam” or “Eve,” or, if one must work through Halloween, strip naked and diligently serve burritos as “Phil.” If the weather proves chilly, one can discard only half their wardrobe and go as “The Pantless Horseman” (added bonus: a well-thought answer to the ex pected question “So, where’s your horse?” can be a surefire pickup line). Indeed, if one feels daring, controversial and likely to spill food or drink on themselves, they may adorn their frame with a blue dress, black beret and tremendous cigar that hangs to the left. Not only are there personal ad vantages to being original in one’s costume choice, but there also is a serious danger in stick ing to the predictable and generic “scary” getup. The average rubber monster mask is so constricting that party patrons can find it difficult to eat, drink or even speak. Because of the constraints of the molding, all the mask-wearer’s words sound like “Fnhere’s the fnong?” And such statements could only be ex pected from these poor, pathetic souls, because the chemicals in volved in the production of such masks cannot help but be inhaled GABRIEL RUENES/ThkBaTO — a major deterrent, unless one wants to see Bob Marley riding the Loch Ness Monster through a sea of macaroni to the tune of Jefferson Airplane’s “White Rabbit.” Aside from costumes as a source of Halloween fun is the age- old tradition of trick-or-treating, THck-or-treating is simple enough today — walk, knock, beg, gracias, vamoose and repeat. But this an cient and mystical ritual has been corrupted by Western thought. TVick-or-treating began thousands of years ago as “balm-or-bite” among the exclusively dwarf popu lation of Dwarfania. Residents of Dwarfania would travel from half-hut to half-hut, . seeking ointments and lotions for embarrassing rashes and attacking the knees of those who could prof fer no balm. And although today’s version of balm-or-biting has been diverted from its progenitor, one should still observe the same rules of etiquette set forth by our dwar- ven friends: 1) Do not get plastered and stumble into a neighbor’s front lawn shrubbery, drunkenly shout ing “MARIA! ” all night. 2) If the trick-or-treatee opens the door and says “I’m afraid I don’t have any candy,” reply with “Well, I’m afraid I don’t have any scruples!” and begin committing any number of wanton pranks. Some tried-and-true favorites are lighting a paper bag of dog poo aflame and throwing it over a tree, or placing a roll of toilet paper in front of the door, knocking and running away. Above all else, the power of imagination and story is the true magic behind Halloween. It is the time to unleash the fiery energy of the child’s imagination and to lose oneself in “What if?” Of course, being mature, civi lized and completely sober college students, A&Mophiles have no need for silly stories, for mindless tales and sensational accounts of ridiculous times past. Speaking of which, did you go to the game? Students, as the leaders of to morrow, have no capacity for such childish pursuits. They are capable of quickly deconstructing and de fame the most spine tingling of sto ries. For example, the student of: — Chemistry: “The tale was completely ridiculous. You can’t even shoot an entirely silver bullet out of a gun. The elemental com ponents of silver and gunpowder alone would have an adverse reac tion leading to...” — Psychology: “Very! So the hook fora handsi’i his inability to commit relationship, and thezorw.' dered the earth becausehei from penis envy.” — Foreign Languages: be molto seccante. Houdito moro quel suono meglio." lated as: “The bright girl see' bean store. The restroom is pied by two large sailors.”) — Ag. Design: “I liked it!’ — English: “The premise: tale was incredibly dubious) only was the narrative pointo view completely ludicrous at: nonexclusive, but the protag) was obviously underdevelop monster’s eating habits wetei cious, and the prosaic resoli nouement was an atrocious!! ment to poor craftsmanship. mics and shot raduation rec minorities a Minorities he affected by tl Issessment of ’AAS) since 90, Al Kauffm 6e Mexican Ar Inse and E |lALDEF), sak “The test i race,” Kauffme lurt. “The ste Hid used an hr valid way to de thousands and prity students I Attorneys fc Jition Agency jardized exan pool account |iat the test o lent achievem “It’s not pu ring that the Ication,” Geof Istant attorney The plaintil laint a frown a | very happy f The lawyers losing argumc ial before U.S |rado. The juc pected for at “It’s probat lenging decis lake in the tin Irado, a 15-yt federal bench, MALDEF file [alf of minorit [ents. Some pi. mpleted theii orkbut were c use they neve Students firs test in reading, ith grade. — Jacob Hnval is a soft \ \ A- g .e? Write your own scary stof The night was evil, and the air was filled with a quiet (omen, desperation, poot). Our hero, the nubile .(supermodel, body builder, Jersey cow), knew that something or someone was amiss. Pat had left the room a long time ago to get some .(action, late night, Scoo- flew open. The killer laugW maniacally, brandishing his (knife, meathook,Jul Tesh CD). As he edged nets our hero could smell these! of imminent (doom, death, breakfast). But just!* fore the killer lunged forwad our hero awoke to find it ^ a terrible (dream, by) snacks. Suddenly, the door mare, column). E3 NTRODUCING John D. Huntley Class of '79 313B South College Ave., College Station, TX 77840 (409) 846-8916 An authorized TAG Heuer dealer. Do you know what these mimes are trying! tell you? ...is now taking applications for both hungry mini! and stomachs! Let us satisfy your famished minds occasionally thro$ out the semester with intriguing group dinner discus^ with fellow students and professors all while enjoying food. To participate attend one of the follo% informationals: Tues., October 26th at 8:30pm in RudderSl# or ^letco Surgin; Kelly 5 G'lor- B r 9£OS 4'Unt( US N ; F nto-I Wed., October 27th at 8:30pm in Rudder# http://conversations.tamu.edu This is a program for TAMU students sponsored by the MSG To inform us of your special needs, please call 845-8770 or slop by MSC 223-1.