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PHOTOS COURTESY OF GRAHAM AND TURNER
J. Tom Graham, left plays a security guard who is trying to become a federal
agent, and Pat Turner, right plays many roles including, above a man and below
in drag, in the two-man comedy.
BY KIFFIN COLLINS
The Battalion
r he daring and exciting life of an
American security guard who
desires to be a federal agent but
faces the problem of not being intel
ligent enough is a new music come
dy skit.
“There’s No Cure for Dumb...Once
You’ve Got It, You’ve Got It All Your
Life,” is playing at the StageCenter in
downtown Bryan.
The two-man show stars Texas
Premiere veteran actor Pat Turner,
who plays in a variety of roles, and
author of the play “For Marrieds
Only,” J. Tom Graham, plays the role
of the security guard Augie Albright.
Graham said when he began
scouting for the second actor to fulfill
his script, he looked to Tyler, Texas.
Turner was an actor out of Tyler
who had previously starred in many
plays.
Graham and Turner began a
friendship that lasted for two years
and continues with the success of
“Dumb.”
TUrner plays all thejOther charac
ters in the comedy, including two fe
male roles.
Graham said it took a while for
Turner to conform to playing a
woman.
“He is a very uptight individual, so
it took some time for him to trans
form himself into Fredricka, a hook
er in the show,” he said. “It is pretty
hard for an East Texas man to play a
prostitute. It requires a lot of acting.”
Graham’s career began with the
debut of his first comedy, “Marrieds,”
which was so popular, it ended up on
a 16-month road tour of the United
States.
“There are many versions of ‘For
Marrieds Only,’ and they have been
retold everywhere,” he said. “Most
people know me for that show.”
He said he began writing “Dumb”
last summer as a hobby.
“I would spend my free time on
the weekends writing the script and
music,” Graham said. “It took about
six weeks to finalize the show. I ini
tially wrote the parts for professional
actors, but one backed out so I end
ed up playing the security guard. I am
definitely a better writer than per
former, but Turner and I do quite
well.”
Graham said there is no way to
classify the show.
“There is nothing in the theater
like this show,” he said. “It is not a
musical, we just sing dumb songs. It
is best described as a word-and-mu-
sic comedy skit. It is just a little road
show full of nonsense really.
“I would compare it to the come
dy ‘A Funny Thing Happened on the
Way to the Forum’ in that they both
contain ‘ha-ha’ funny songs and
script. ”
The musical score accompanying
the comedy was written by Graham
and previously recorded at Rosewood
Studio in Tyler.
Graham said the music is not
meant to be beautiful.
“It is not extravagant music, just
comedic in nature,” he said.
When Graham is not on the road
or humoring local audiences, he is
the publisher of the Pasadena Citizen,
the newspaper in Pasadena, Texas.
Graham said if there is a moral in
this play it is: “God looks after mo
rons too.”
Graham said he hopes to continue
performing with Turner and keep the
show on the road.
“We will continue to do this as
long as we are having fun and mak
ing money,” he said.
“Dumb” will be playing at Stage-
Center in downtown Bryan Friday,
April 30, and Saturday, May 1.
Tickets are $10 for this special en
gagement, which serves as a fund
raiser for StageCenter, Bryan-College
Station’s community theater.
For reservations or further infor
mation about this event or any up
coming events call 823-4297.
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