The Battalion
Classified ds
To place a classified ad: Phone: 845-0569 / Fax: 845-2678
fl THB Battalion
GGIELIFE
Tuesday • June 2,
Officq: Room 015 (basement) Reed McDonald Building
Business Hours
8 a.m. - 5 p.m. Monday through Friday
Insertion deadline: 1 p.m. prior business day
VISA
M Clash of the Titans
ADOPTION
Adoption a New Beginning. Engineer dad & librarian
mom offer loving Christian home in Texas & great oppor
tunities. Rennie/ Paul 1-888-739-1839 or TGC 1-800-
299-4523.
ANNOUNCEMENTS
Larger Breasts!!! Safe and Affordable Alternative To
Implants.'. Fast Results!! Toll-Free 1-877-6-BREAST!
COMPUTERS
233MMX, 4.3gig, 32SDRAM, 56K modem, monitor,
color printer, software included. Zero down, all credit
accepted. Call 1-888-775-5735.
Pentium 233MMX $815, Pentiumll 233mhz $1,035,
300mhz $1,165, W/3.2GBHD, 32MBRAM, 24XCDROM,
s/speakers, 56kmodem, 4MBvideo, 14"monitor, 1-year
warranty, upgradable, 4.3/6.4GB add $30/$65, 15717"
monitor add $30/$140, 846-7186.
Pentium computer 233MMX w/MMX, 3.2GB, 32MBRAM
24XCDROM 15"monitor, 33.6k modem, sound card and
speakers, $695. Please call 260-5963.
DJ MUSIC |
"Party Block Mobile DJ"- Peter Block, professional/
experienced. Specializing in Weddings, TAMU func
tions, lights/smoke. Mobile to anywhere. The Bestll
693-6294. http://www.partyblockdj.com
FOR RENT
"Efficiency apartment across from main campus.
Northgate, w/d, pool, garage parking. Available now.
12-month minimum lease. $375/mo. $375/deposit. Call
Vincent/Farah @846-3052.
1 -Bedroom apartment. $450/mo. All bills paid. Cable.
Available June-lst. 846-2913.
Dollhouse. 2-story. 2bdrm/11/2bath, like new. 400
Macarthur. $720/mo. 693-1448.
Sublease available a.s.a.p. 3-bedrooms, 2-baths, w/d.
Arbors at Woifpen Creek. Call 774-4258 or pager 223-
0543.
"Summer sublease. University Commons. Reduced
rent for Ibdrm/lbath. Fully furnished apartment.
$300/mo. John @(409)764-7782, Roy @(214)951-
2860."
Walk to TAMU. 2bdrm/1bath. Fenced. 416 Tauber.
$385/mo. 693-1448.
HELP WANTED
Flexible daytime hours cleaning homes in B/C.Sta.
Need transportation & telephone. $5.75/hr. Call 690-
6882.
P/T job helping handicapped. Male student preferred.
$270/mo. 12hrs/wk. 846-3376.
Part-time cook & counter position needed at Koppe
Bridge Bar and Grill. 764-2933.
Part-time evening work doing commercial office clean
ing, Mon.-Fri. Call for an appointment, 823-5031.
PHLEBOTOMISTS (FT & PT Unit Pay) LabCorp is
one of the nation's largest and most successful clinical
laboratories. We are seeking experienced phle-
botomists who are able to work independently in the
Bryan/ College Station area. Great work hours for col
lege students. One year of experience required. A com
petitive salary and benefits package will be offered.
Qualified applicants should mail or fax resume and
salary history, to: LabCorp, 7207 N. Gessner,
Houston, TX 77040, or fax to (409)639-2491. E.O.E.
LabCorp.
Teaching Assistant needed in Montesori Pre-school
Summer Camp. July 6th-July 31st. 696-1674.
PERSONAL
Questions About Life? Relationships! Moneyl Love!
Talk to Psychics livelll 1-900-860-8616, Ext.#1237.
$3.99 per minute. 24 hours- 7 days/wk. Must be 18
years or older. Serv-U: (619)645-8434.
Who’s Badder: Old School or New School Godzilla?
FOR SALE
Good location.
For sale: 2-bedroom mobile home.
(254)582-3343 or 693-8777.
Need quality furniture? We’re moving and must sell:
kitchen table and chairs $60; computer desk $55;
armoire $60. Call 693-0140.
Nice outdoor furniture: 2 chairs & a small table $40, or
best offer. Please call Charlie at 694-5251.
PETS
5-foot Albino Burmese Python $250. 6-foot green pat
ternless Burmese Python $300. Healthy, tame, feeding
weekly. Cage available. Call Charlie, 694-5251.
Adopt: Puppies, Kittens, Cats, Dogs. Many pure
breedsl Brazos Animal Shelter-775-5755.
AKC Siberian Husky puppies, Champion line, absolute
ly gorgeous, beautiful batman masks, sweet, perfectly
marked, black & white angels. $125. 696-5802.
Free puppy black Lab, well mannered 8 weeks old.
Please call 696-7130.
Persian kitten CFA registered, blue/cream female, with
shots. $150. Please call 693-0239.
ROOMMATES
Free May Rent! Female Roommate- Summer.
Furnished. Nice. Call 764-9189.
SERVICES
AAA Texas Defensive Driving. Lots-of-fun, Laugh-a-loti!
Ticket dismissal/insurance discount. M-T(6pm-9pm),
W-Th(6pm-9pm), Fri(6pm-8pm) &Sat(10am-2:30pm),
Sat(8am-2:30pm). Inside Nations-Bank. Walk-ins wel
come. $25/cash. Lowest price allowed by law. 111-
Univ. Dr., Ste.217. 846-6117. Show-up 30/min. early.
(CP-0017).
WEIGHT LOSS
CHOOSE TO LOSE!! Why "weight?" Please call 775-
3188.
Travis
Irby
staff writer
Godzilla
is one of the
all-time
greatest cin
ematic mon-
s t e r s .
Looking like
a cross
between an
avocado and
a dragon,
this fire
belching
behemoth
has stomped
countless Japanese cities. The big
G has starred in over 20 films,
including a "new and improved"
version playing in theaters now.
One might ask how the origi
nal Godzilla could be improved.
After all, no military force has
been able to stop it. Aliens have
failed to beat it, as well as just
about every overgrown insect,
ape and dinosaur. It seems it
would be hard to improve upon
such success.
Leave it to Hollywood to try
anyway. In this summers
Godzilla, there, is no more thun
der-thighed reptile the public has
come to love. Instead, this Neo-
Godzilla looks more like the her-
petological equivalent of a heroin-
chic model.
The new Godzilla also suffers
from some sort of gender confu
sion. This would explain why
he/she spends most or the movie
running from the military instead
of exterminating it. Maybe this
Godzilla is looking for a public
restroom, but is unsure of which
one to use.
The new Godzilla is as fertile
as one of those welfare mothers
Newt Gingrich is always com
plaining about, producing a cou
ple hundred brood. But one might
ask Steven Spielberg for a blood
test — the
baby 'zillas
look a little
bit like those
velociraptors
from Jurassic
Park. If
Godzilla
is preg-
nant,
maybe
they should
try to placate it
with peanut butter
and pickles.
The truth is if any Godzilla
deserves to bake the Big Apple, it
should be the classic Godzilla.
The cranky hermaphrodite that is
Neo-Godzilla would be more at
home on "The Jerry Springer
Show" than wrecking a major
city. (Possible Springer episode
title: "Your Lizard is a Lady")
Godzilla is known as the king
of all monsters, not the queen.
There are already plenty of those
roaming the streets of New York.
Gone is Godzilla's feared
atomic breath. It has been
replaced by some bad breath that
can ignited like a noxious fart.
There are two things synonymous
with Godzilla. One is being a big,
bipedal lizard with plates on its
back. The other is radioactive fire
coming out of its gullet. If some
one is going to create a Godzilla
without those two traits, they
might as well make a chimp
chewing gum, because it will not
be the king of all monsters.
The great Godzilla isn't a
mutated dinosaur anymore — it
is an irradiated iguana. A conse
quence of such an origin could be
the nation's children running out
to pet stores. America's youth
would purchase baby iguanas for
microwave use, in attempt to cre
ate their own Godzilla. No one
/
ever had to worry about this
g roblem with the old Godzilla,
ecause one, where would one
find a dinosaur? And second,
how would it fit in a
microwave?
Special effects can be
g reat, but the guy in rub
er suit approach seemed
a hell of a lot more fun
than today's $120 million
screen saver. There was
always great enj
ment in watching
an actor in an
elaborate ^
Halloween
costume
destroy
ing toy
cities, wnile
dubbed per- V
formers mouthed
words of terror heard
by the audience five min
utes after being spoken.
It is a common human dream
to don heavy rubber and ter
rorize people. People live vic
ariously through the old
Godzilla movies. After all,
the only people who can
make a career out of this
are professional domina- j
trixes and the guy in the ' A
Godzilla suit. ■
The new Godzilla is /fl
Godzilla in name only.
Comparing the old and ■
new is like comparing ^
Classic Coke to New Coke. 1
New Coke was an unfortu- '
nate marketing blip — heavi
ly promoted, nut lacking the
soul of the original. Hopefully,
like Classic Coke, Classic
Godzilla will reign supreme
once again. ^
Travis Irby is a senior
journalism major
* n |
-Dili i
' CL '
'■ Ig
lar
I ( 1
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i 10 ■ I
ep'
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ATHLETES FOOT STUDY
Patient volunteers needed for research
study of new investigational medicine.
Free physical exam,
treatments, study medications and lab
tests for qualified participants. Ages
18 years and above. No topical
(prescription or over the counter)
treatment in the last 2 weeks.
Call for information:
J&S Studies
846-5933
YEAST INFECTION
STUDY
Females ages 18 and older are
being recruited to participate in a
research study to compare two
research medications for the
treatment of a yeast infection
(vaginitis). If you are currently
experiencing vaginal burning,
itching or irritation call for more
information. The research
medication, study related
laboratory tests and physical
examination by the doctor will be
provided free of charge providing
you meet eligibility requirements.
Eligible volunteers will be
compensated up to $150.
Call for information:
J&S Studies
846-5933
DO YOU HAVE
SWIMMER’S EAR?
We may be able to help! Our
doctors are conducting a
research study of an ear drop
treatment for swimmer’s ear
(external ear infection).
You may be eligible for a
clinical research study.
Qualified research volunteers
will receive at no cost:
•Research related office visits
and evaluations
•Study medicine
Compensation will be given.
Call for information:
J&S Studies
(409) 846-5933
The Battalion
Classified
Advertising
• Easy
• Affordable
• Effective
For information, call
345-0569
COLLEGE STATION PART-TIME JOBSU
Universal Computer Systems, Inc. is looking for candidates for
part-time positions at our College Station facility. You must be
able to work at least 15 hours, Monday - Friday and every other
Saturday. All positions offer $6.00 per hour to start!!!! Other
full-time positions also available.
Office Assistant
Technician Assistant
Customer Service
To apply, please call our Recruiting Headquarters:
1-800-883-3031
UCS HIRES NON-TOBACCO USERS ONLY
E.O.E.
http://www.ucs-systems.com
Does The Sun Cause You To Have
Cold Sores/Fever Blisters?
If you are 18 or older you may qualify for
this study. If you qualify benefits include
FREE study medication and up to $525
for time and travel.
Call for information:
J&S Studies
Movie Wrap-Up
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
Starring Johnny Depp and Benicio Del Toro
Directed by Terry Gilliam
Rated R
Playing at Post Oak Cinema
The movie adaptation of Hunter S. Thompson's novel could also
be titled "Lifestyles of the Stoned and Psychotic." Tear and Loathing
follows the adventures of the drugged up duo of Raoul Duke and
his attorney Dr. Gonzo through the City of Sin, Las Vegas. Sin they
do, as the pair consume every drug known to man and then some.
They trip in and out of the city's hotels and casinos, encountering
dwarves, lizards and cops. The film is one long series of drugged
induced hallucinations, appealing both visually and comedically.
The film is not for everyone with its heavy drug use, but those
who enjoy satire of drug culture will dig it.
Verdict: C+
Deep Impact
Starring Tea Leoni, Morgan Freeman and Robert Duvall
Directed by Mimi Leder
Rated PG-13
Playing at Hollywood 16 and Schulman 6
The first of the summer's space-objects-hitting-Earth movies. Deep
Impact offers more drama than action, with satisfying results. The
Earth is in the path of a world destroying comet and everyone must
figure out how to survive. Solid performances compliment the film's
nice effects.
Verdict: B
reasons you should take
our
Summer
I7ICAT
course
Superior materials
With over 4000 pages of review material and practice
passages, you can be sure that you are getting the best
MCA! materials on the market.
You’re the Focus
We focus on your needs to help you do your best. We go
the extra mile; if you still have questions after class, simply
set up on extra help session with your instructor - it's free.
Summer courses start June 13 th .
Spaces held on a first-come, first-served basis.
Call today to reserve your seat.
Call or visit us at
409.696.9099
www.review.com
THE
PRINCETON
REVIEW
by Travis li
Starring Jada Pinkett and Tommy Davidson
Directed by Daisy V.S. Meyer
Rated R
Playing at Hollywood 16
Woo (Jada Pinkett) is one heck of a woman. The kind of wo
that turns men into mush and always gets her way. Tommy Davii
plays her blind date, a straight arrow type, who doesn't knowi
ne is getting in to. This basis for the blind date disaster movie Ht
The movie suffers from a bad case of cliche-itis, by not breal
any new ground with a familiar concept. Pinkett is charming,bn
her cuteness can't save this dull film.
Verdict: C-
Bulworth
Starring Warren Beatty and Halle Berry
Directed by Warren Beatty
Rated R
Playing at Post Oak Cinema
An ambitious poke at politics, Bulworth follows the exploits
down trodden U.S. senator trying to kill himself. In the midstofa
eling California primary Senator Jay Bulworth takes out a $10 mil
life insurance policy and then hire someone to kill him. All of sudd
Bulworth starts speaking the truth about American politics
becomes wildly popular.
The movie is funny and strange, but maybe mostly latter to
those of a more conservative political nature.
Verdict: B-
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Schulman Theatres
College Park 6
www.schulman-theatres.com
Bcs online www.lockon.com
2080 E. 29th St., Bryan 775-2463
BOX OFFICE OPENS AT 12:30
Now Showing - Today’s Times Only
HOPE FLOATS
m (PG13) 1:40 4:20 7:30 9:50
ALMOST HEROES «aB5rew (PG13) 1:50 4:30 7.20 9:30
SH (PG13) 1:00 4:00 7:00 10:00
GODZILLA
QUEST FOR CAMELOT H] (G)
SB (PG13) 1:30 4:30 7:30 10:15
1:30 3:15 5:00 7:00
TITANIC
aa jpGiaL
DEEP IMPACT
m (PG13) 1:20 4:00 7:15 9:45
The Princeton Reivew is not affiliated with Princeton University or AAMC.
$3.00 - all shows before 6 p.m.
$3.00 - children/seniors $5.00 - Adults
Fleas!!!!
In Your Home?
Research sites are needed for
a 14 Day In-Home flea control
study. We provide Free indoor
flea control in exchange for
your cooperation.
Please call Granovsky Assoc,
at 822-3069
Seinfeld’s snact
requirements
SYDNEY, Australia (/VP)'
The array of snacks
Seinfeld reportedly requi
backstage is idiosyncril
enough to inspire a "Seinfe'1
episode.
The superstar comediafll
scheduled to do eight
shows in Australia this mont|
but only if he gets certal
foods, according to The Dflj
Telegraph.
The paper quotes
unnamed promoter as sayi"!
Seinfeld's “essential backstai
items" include: 1 8 small botti f l
of water on ice (any brail
except Evian is fine), one bag 1 !
Rold Gold pretzels, one ve?
etable tray for four people, d 1 flie/ 0 |jl
small jar of mayonnaise, and|'T.(Ted)|
small amount of pasta salad' ^>nanda
hold the mayonnaise. ^ r Mr.]
"By superstar standards, i'l nease L
not that demanding a list," ^ Jes toal4
promoter told the Telegraph, poffhel