The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current, April 01, 1998, Image 3

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    The Battalion
dnesday •
April
Wednesday • April 1, 1998
Fill In The blanks
Book of
and
metaphors.
descriptions celebrates
similes
birthday
Chris
Martin
staff writer
H
elp me out — I need an
adjective. Slimy? Okay,
now I need a number.
88? Great. Now another adjec
tive. Pulsating? Alright, now let
me read this back — “Slimy
88th birthday, Pulsating Libs!”
Wait a minute, that didn’t
work out. How about, “Happy
40th birthday, Mad Libs!” Yes,
the great staple of elementary
book fairs, family vacations and
band bus trips has circled the
sun 40 times as of this year.
Like mix tapes and beef jerky, no childhood road
trip was complete without one of those shiny flip
books with titles like “Mad Libs,” “Son of Mad
Libs,” "Bride of Mad Libs”and “Inbred Cousin of
Mad Libs.”
Mad Libs was more than mere amusement,
mind you. It secretly and subversively was educa
tional, like “Schoolhouse Rock” and "Sesame
Street.” Looking back to Mad Libs makes one pon
der, can learning truly be fun? My word, let’s get
those guys working on Physics 202.
As simple as the Mad Libs are — filling in the
strategically absent verbs, nouns, adjectives and
adverbs of funny little stories — there was always
that one kid around to screw things up.
“Give me an adverb,” you would ask. “That’s a
word ending in -ly.”
V “Uh,” the kid would think, and then offer "silly?”
And when we finally found out that a noun was
not just a person, place or thing, but — egads — an
idea, you would get results like “One day Tom rode
into town on a big green socialism.”
Mad Libs were especially fun when deliberately
skewed to be either gross or sexual. Adjectives like
“burning,” "heaving” and “festering” were espe
cially popular. And the rapture provided by the dis
covery of turning gross nouns into equally gross
adjectives by the simple addition of -y or -ish. Got
boogers? How boogerish!
The game was the brainchild of Roger Price, the
humorist-illustrator responsible for “Droodles,”
those simple but abstract scribbles that made no
sense until you read the caption, and television
writer Leonard Stern, pioneer of “The Honey-
mooners,” “The Steve Allen Show” and “Get
Smart.”
I can imagine the moment of conception. One
guy turns to the other and says, “There’s too many
books out there today that are complete and au
tonomous entities. So here’s my idea. We make
these books with stuff missing. All the important
details are blank. The kids will love it!”
It sounds odd, but 100 million copies later, the
kids still love it. Like Tic Tac Toe before and Tetris
after, Mad Libs has the three essential qualities of a
timeless pastime: easy to learn, an infinite possi
bility for variation and most of all, it’s fun. It’s pul
sating. It’s boogerish.
Chris Martin is a senior journalism major.
I> is a Battalion sen
^s! te,T;|5S brings new show with radio personality to tackle ‘Saturday Night Live’
(no later than thtB NEW Y0RK (Ap)
if the desired mntim
leadlines and
if will not be run in
U Howard Stern
on enough to
, Jhome Saturday
tny question®’ ?
t845^r
The ribald radio
rsonality will
jr in a late night
Stern
show on CBS that will chal
lenge NBC’s "Saturday Night
Live,” the Daily News reported
Tuesday.
The show will begin this
summer to get a jump on
“SNL,” which usually doesn’t
begin its season until October.
Because of concerns about
Stern’s raunchy humor, CBS af
filiates can reportedly opt out
of broadcasting the show.
In 1990, Stern was host of a
syndicated show that often
beat “Saturday Night Live” in
major markets, but its risque
content scared off stations in
smaller markets. The show
ended in 1992.
The main competitor to
“SNL,” Fox’s “Mad TV,” draws
about 4.5 million viewers a
week, compared with 9.2 mil
lion for the NBC show.
Mew qroup
uplifts music
cpedibilitq
o fS pice Gins
All Saints
All Saints
London Records
Critique: F
R emember the days of the British Invasion. The
Beatles, the Stones, the Wlio. Great bands with
great music. These days, the isle is spawning
such Toxic Avenger-style mutations such as Oasis,
the Spice Girls and now All Saints. Like all weird
events this year, El Nino seems to be the likely cul
prit, but until then, this side of the pond shall be
subjected to yet another talentless all-girl band who
think cleavage somehow translates into good music.
Admittedly, only one of the girls is British,
but the band was formed in London, so you do
the comparisons.
Upon examining this sexual experience
wrapped in cellophane, the most notable track title
is “Under the Bridge.” Wait one hot minute! Coincidence? I think not.
These four lasses have attempted to cover the song that mined the rebel
image of the Red Hot Chili Peppers. They put a lackluster En Vogue spin on
the ballad complete with faux funky beat and over-done drum machines.
Everyone remembers the girls in high school who never did a single
homework assignment themselves. They always got their boyfriend to
do it, or a best friend or, in the case of the dreaded group project, the girl
would take the credit for everyone else’s work. Well if the music industry
was high school, and increasingly it seems to be turning into that, All
Saints would be the class cheaters.
Not a single track on their self-titled album has a original thought on
it. Such questionably credible acts as Salt ’n’ Pepa, TLC, En Vogue and
even the Spice Girls themselves fall victim to these garbage raiders.
Imagine that. A song so bad the Spice Girls wouldn’t even do it.
All Saints have tried to throw off the obvious comparisons to the
Spice Girls, claiming they are concerned with their music, not their im
age and making movies.
Ironically enough, the only two tracks the girls wrote together sound
so “spice-erific” I can imagine Sporty pointlessly kicking her legs in the
air on the video.
Maybe like their role models, they should ditch the music and follow
the spicy route to success. Perhaps adopting cool nicknames like “I wish
I was young enough to be Baby” or “I could be Posh, but I don’t have the
common sense to get my roots done” would help, but it isn’t too likely.
The only semblance of talent — excuse me as 1 laugh at the use of the
word in conjunction with this band — comes from Shaznay Lewis who is
credited with co-writing the majority of the songs from All Saints. While her
rapping is a shameless heist of Left Eye with the occasional petty thievery
attempt at sounding like Salt, she brings the group some strength.
The rest of the girls sound like background vocalists who walked into
the wrong recording both.
The only thing worse than listening to this album is having to write a
review for it, and after hours of having this album on repeat, it is time to
sacrifice this record to the lions. All hail the patron saints of talentless
music groups: All Saints.
Aaron
Meier
night news editor
tlP US SAVE
THE PI^H
'' .u>"i
■ '/■"■'i J ft™
Fame
iy
Free Jason’s Deli delivery
after 4 PM with Student I.D.
The Politically Correct Alternative.
Pizza is one of the most stalked and preyed upon meals in the
United States, and is at the top of the endangered foods list.
Please help save the pizza by making a conscious and politically
correct decision at your next meal:
Call Jason’s Deli.
Not only will you be working to save pizza from extinction, you’ll
feel better because you’re eating higher on the food chain.
Jasoris deli
1404 Texas Ave. S. • 764-2929 • 764-2712 FAX
email: www.jasonsdeli.com
$6 minimum order
QoCden National Honor Society
Will be having a meeting
Wednesday, April 1 st • 7:00 p.m. Rudder 510
Study Abroad Representatives will be giving a presentation
Wolf Pen Creek Amphitheater
(Rain Out: Bryan Civic Auditorium)
Ticket Prices: $10 in advance $12 at the gate
Group Tickets: $8 for groups of 10 or more
Ticket Outlets: Christian Bookstores, Wehner,
MSC, College Station Parks and Recreation
or any Aggie Men’s Club member
For more information call: Wayne Hanks 775-0579
Sponsored by The Aggie Men’s Club
Benefitting Still Creek Ranch -
”A Home for Boys and Girls”
*
A
*
st
n
*
The Career Center is seeking a Graduate
Assistant to assist graduate and professional
students of Texas A&M with their career
planning and job-hunting needs. Primary
duties are:
• Individual career advising
• Publicizing / informing of current
Career Center activities
• Developing new services tailored to
the needs of graduate students
Salary and work hours: $12,000 for a
12-month appointment
Start date: ASAP. Position open until filled
Direct Resumes to:
Terri Morrison
Assistant Director
Texas A&M Career Center
209 Koldus
Reckless Panhandlers
CD Release Party
Opening Band 12th Egg Conspiracy
April 2nd - 9:00 p.m.
Third Floor Cantina
$5.00 Cover
CD’s on sale for $10 each