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The Battalion • Page 9
ching From dorms to yells, some traditions might look ‘bad’
stant coach
; ‘93 team, says
ritch to coaching.
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aid Wood brings
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AJA
HENDERSON
Columnist
N ow, where
is that
bus?
I glanced at
my watch and
shifted my
weight from foot
to foot as I wait
ed for the one
marked “Rudder.” I can find few positive things
to say about waiting at a bus stop, except that
one can hear some interesting conversations -
take it from me, the gal notorious for “just miss
ing” that darned bus. (I refuse to shame myself
by waving madly at the bus, only to be left in
front of the rush hour Blocker crowd).
On this particular occasion, I found myself
standing next to two little wrinkled blue-haired
ladies. Being the good Ag that I am, I tried my
best to shut out their conversation. Really, I did.
But, what can I say? Their words just seemed to
float into my brown lobes. I turned in fascination
as I overheard their banter.
“I’m telling you, Myrtle. I don’t know what
these kids are thinking nowadays! I’m up here
visiting my grandbaby Reggie, and guess what
those boys in his dormitory call themselves?
Cocks! Cocks that are hard as rocks?!”
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“Ooh, I know what you mean, Rosie Mae. My
grandson, Nick, has the cutest little friend. I
thought she was the sweetest little thing until I
found out that she lives in a dorm full of flirts!
Just imagine!”
I stifled my laughter as I watched Myrtle and
Rosie Mae each clasp their hearts with one wrin
kled hand, then pat their blue hairdos with the
other. Funny old ladies. You should have seen
their pointy faces, all full of shock and disgust.
I was still chuckling under my breath when the
bus finally arrived. Still, after claiming my seat, I
found myself thinking about our campus as the
bus pulled away from the curb.
Now that I think about it, if you aren’t on Aggie
soil every day like we are, well... some things
around here could be taken the ... urn ... wrong way.
I mean, it really doesn’t take a giant stretch of the
imagination to see that some things around here
are, well... very open to interpretation.
For instance, let’s look at the excessive lip
locking in Aggieland. At Yell Practice, the lights
go out at a certain time and mass foreplay en
sues. This is nothing compared to the next day,
though. At the game, it is customary to kiss
whenever the Aggies score points. Of course,
since we now have such a great football team,
many an Ag leaves Kyle Field with chapped lips
from extended smooching sessions.
One doesn’t have to go so far as Kyle Field,
though. Our residence hall nicknames are pretty
spicy, to say the least. I know I went through
great pains to lean against the nickname on the
bulletin board in my dorm at the beginning of
the semester. Naturally, I had already informed
my parents that my dorm was a serious, studious
one. Yeah, right.
Hmm, let’s see, there are the Keathley Kissers.
Puryear Playboys. Briggs Babes. Hotard Hilton.
Neely Knockouts. Haas Honeys. Crocker Cocks.
McFadden Flirts. Spence Sweethearts. Oh, and
Could Bonfire hold some hidden meaning?
The bigger, the better. The longer it stays up,
the better. And it represents our "burning
desire ..." Where have I heard that before?
we can’t forget the famous Eppright Loveshack!
The list goes on and on. There’s no doubt about
what students are thinking about down here.
“Does anyone need out at the Architecture
Building?” I was jolted back to reality as the bus
lurched to a stop. I shook my head. No! It could
n’t be. Surely, the two blue-hairs were just read
ing too much into things around here. Why, we
Ags are perfectly innocent, aren’t we. They were
clearly out of line to think differently!
As the bus continued to roll along, my eyes wan- .
dered over to the random wood I have dubbed Bon
fire II. Ding! A light bulb went off in my head.
Could it be? Nah. Could it be that Bonfire might
hold some hidden meaning?
Just think-the bigger bonfire is, the better. The .
longer it stays up, the better. Endurance, baby! It is
lit to represent our “burning desire to beat the hell
outta t.u.” Now, where have I heard of
that ‘burning desire” phrase before? I
know - all over the place in my aunt’s
dusty Harlequin romance collection.
Burning logs, burning loins, yes, these
could be connected.
No, it could not be. Those little old
ladies were just way off track. We had
finally reached my stop. As I gathered
my books, I recognized one of the Schu
macher Semen - I mean. Seamen.
I waved.
Perfectly innocent, we Ags are.
Aja Henderson is a sophomore finance major
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Whiners, quit your bellyachin’
Complainers should consider listeners when they bitch
M
MICHAEL
LANDAUER
Columnist
_ y back hurts right
now. My head, too. I
-don’t feel like writing
and I have a lot of reading to
do. I have no dating life and
no money. And, most of all,
I’m sick of complaining.
No one cares about how
much reading I have or if I
feel like writing.
No one wants to hear our sob stories about dating and
money. So why do we tell them?
Humans have a tendency to invite people into their minds
to sort out their worries. We know whales communicate, but I
wonder if they do as much trivial bitching as humans do.
Everyone has experienced this - trivial bitching, not com
municating with whales. We sit down in class and the person
next to us tells us how many tests they have this week, that
they’re fighting with their best friend and that their alarm
clock is broken and they missed the bus. Sometimes we have
to ask ourselves, “Why me?” Sometimes I feel like I have a
sign on my head that says, “Bitch to me.”
In the past year I have learned a few great phrases I
wish more people lived by.
Bonfire has certainly
taught people the impor
tance of “sucking it up.”
People have been sucking
it up 24 hours a day for a
week now out at Stack.
They have rebuilt Bonfire,
but in everyday life suck
ing it up builds character.
Another buzz word is “Hakunah Mattattah” which, as
we learned in “The Lion King,” means “No Worries.” It
would be great if things didn’t get to us all the time, but
they do. Sometimes everything seems to be falling apart.
Whether it is a bus stop hut, Bonfire, our ranking in the
AP football poll or more personal problems, we rarely pass
up an opportunity to gripe and moan.
If someone opened a complaint stand and charged a dollar
for ten minutes worth of empathy it would not be long before
they were rich. They would make even more if they offered dis
counts to people discussing Bill Clinton or Rush Limbaugh.
But, we don’t need a stand like that as long as we have friends.
These people either care about our problems, or at least don’t
People should discriminate when they un
load their problems. If you plan to bitch and
whine to someone, ask yourself if you would
be willing to listen to their problems, too.
question our right to be upset.
So, how do we know when we are good enough friends with
someone to be able to unload our problems on them? There
should be a whining license you have to apply for to regulate it.
When two people agree they are ready to listen to each other’s
trivial problems, they could go buy one. It would be a great way
to acknowledge your true friends.
More importantly, it would be a great way to quiet down
those borderline friends who bore you with their complaints.
You could just tell them, “Sorry Bob, but I just don’t remember
us getting a whining license together. I’d love to listen to your
problems, but it would be illegal.”
Of course the world could never work this way. The truth
is that we know who our friends are by how much they put
up with our crap. We know they are a good friend when they
listen and do not offer advice - they just empathize and ad
mit your situation sucks.
When they tell you their problems, they don’t expect any
words of wisdom, either. One friend of mine surprised me
with her attitude when she told me some painful stories
about her past. Before I could even begin to react, she was
telling me that the past didn’t matter and there was noth
ing she could do about it - so why worry.
We need more of these peo
ple in the world.
Some people are positive and
others are liberals — I mean
negative. We are all in negative
moods sometimes, but we
should control our urge to un
load on people who don’t care. If
we tell everyone our problems it
undermines true friendship.
Sure, you’ll share your thoughts with your friend, but
you’ll also tell the guy who sits next to you in chemistry. We
should feel honored when our friends confide in us, but it
would be worthless if they confide in anyone who will listen.
Maybe it sounds cold-hearted, but people should learn to
discriminate when they look to unload their problems. Not
everyone cares. If you plan to bitch and whine to someone,
ask yourself if you would be willing to listen to their prob
lems, too. You’ll be surprised how few people you will want to
tell about you’re crappy day.
I’m done complaining now, strangers. Thanks for listening.
mmMggwi wmmii m
Michael Landauer is a sophomore journalism major
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■
Opinions cannot please
every Aggie all the time
I read with some interest the Oct.
31 letter by Jim Staley.
Staley feels that The Battalion does
not have columnists who accurately rep
resents the views of our student body.
Now, let me be the first to say that
there is some merit to this. I have yet
to agree with any of Frank Stanford’s
columns, for example.
However, consider that this is a
campus with more than 40,000 stu
dents. There is a total of eight colum
nists. Assuming that each of the
40,000 students has well-defined views
and opinions, doesn’t it seem unfair to
expect these eight to completely mir
ror the views of each student?
Granted, there are times when it
seems the Batt is leaning a little bit to
the left (a guest columnist writing an
“objective” recap of the George Bush-
Ann Richards debate truly crystallized
this view for me), but there are times
when it leans a little bit to the right.
There have been days when I’ve
seen letters in the Batt complaining
The Battalion
Editorial Board
Belinda Blancarte, Editor in chief
Mark Evans, Managing editor
|ay Robbins, Opinion editor
Jenny Magee, Asst, opinion editor
Editorials appearing in The Battalh
reflect the views of the editorial board. Thi
do not necessarily reflect the opinions
other Battalion staff members, the Tex
A&M student body, regents, adn '
faculty or staff.
Columns, guest columns, cs
letters express the opinions ol
Contact the opinion editor for mf
§§
iiiiii iiiiiii i in sni i
Not Valuable Players
Don't give out awards when they don't play
Baseball most valuable player
awards should not have been given
this year, regardless of the players’
talent and ability.
This is not to say that Jeff Bag-
well of the Houston Astros or Frank
Thomas of the Chicago White Sox
were undeserving of the award, but
it shouldn’t have been given out in
the first place.
It would have been one thing if the
season had been played through its
entirety to the World Series, but with
a players strike it doesn’t seem fitting
that such awards are presented.
Because players did not have the
chance to play the whole season,
some did not have the opportunity to
show all their talent and ability.
Awarding MVPs for half a season of
play doesn’t seem fair to those who
may have shown remarkable skills
later on.
Furthermore, baseball and its
players do not deserve any attention
or recognition. After all, baseball
was taken from the fans this sum
mer because of greed.
No one should be rewarded for
that, no matter what their batting
averages and home run percentages.
Fans didn’t get a World Series, so
players shouldn’t get MVPs ... period.
Professional sports are glamorized
as it is, but when players receive
awards for playing only half a sea
son, something just isn’t right. Bag-
well and Thomas may be fantastic
players, but that doesn’t erase the
fact that baseball fans were stripped
of their joy this summer.
Restore baseball as America’s pas
time and bring a World Series to
fans next year. Owners and players
need to solve the salary cap problem
and allow a full season of play next
year. Then, perhaps, MVP’s will be
well-deserved and justified.
OFFICE
11IIJ1
iilliltl!
about the liberal and the conservative
slant to the editorials on the same day.
This is a sign that the Batt is of
fending everybody, which is not neces
sarily a bad thing.
I’ve been here for five years, and let
me tell you, these columnists are a
well-balanced, moderate group com
pared to the ranting and ravings we
were subjected to by Ellen Hobbs and
Irwin Tang.
Erin, Jay and Melissa, thanks for
some great reading, and keep up the
good work!
The Battalion encour
ages letters to the editor
and will print as many as
space allows. Letters
must be 300 words or
less and bidude the au
thor's name, class, and
phone number.
We reserve the right
to edit letters for length.
i H i W&MSmm
David Hill
Class of ’93
Address letters to:
The Satiation - Mail Call
013 Reed McDonald
Texas A&M University
CoBege Station, TX
77843-1111
Fax: (409) 845-2647
E-mail:
Batt@tamvm1 .tamu.edu