Page 6
The Battalion
Monday, September2S
HEALTH CARE
ADMINISTRATION
STUDENTS.
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• Advanced education opportunities.
• Complete medical and dental care.
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b'l B Y O B
MSC
Political
Forum
ody
to our next
Political Forum
General Committee
Meeting
Feature Speaker
Rodger Lewis
Brazos County Republican
Party Chairman
Thursday, Sept.28
301 Rudder
7:00 pm
This program is presented for educational purposes, and does
not neccessarily reflect the views of MSC Political Forum.
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Junk mail
more than
wasted paper
MESA, Ariz. (AP) — Wanna buy a
cemetery plot, cheap? How about a
free spinal exam by a chiropractor?
Or 20 percent off on your first den
tal visit? Maybe a free appraisal of
your house would interest you.
These offers and more, covering
almost every aspect of life, including
death (undertakers) and taxes (ac
counting firms), are a billion-dollar
annual business.
If you have a permanent address,
you’ve received coupons or business
reply cards from advertisers as big as
American Express and as small as
your neighborhood pizzeria, prom
ising to save you money or improve
your life.
It’s called “direct mail,” more
commonly known as junk mail.
In 1988, more than 221 billion
coupons, up from 215 billion in
1987, were distributed and 3.2 per
cent, or about 7 billion, were re
deemed, according to American Ad
vertising Distributors, Inc., the
largest U.S. direct mail franchiser.
With more than 100 franchises, the
company distributed 650 million
coupons last year.
While discounts on name brands
and new products are appreciated,
AAD says consumers prefer cou
pons from local merchants.
But what clicks in one area of the
country may not do as well in an
other, and what works one year may
wear off the next.
For example, according to AAD
research in 450 cities, a year ago piz
zerias reported the best results with
coupons offering $1 off a large
pizza. More recently, customers pre
ferred “buy one, get one free” of
fers.
Likewise, last year’s coupons of
fered 99-cent video rentals while this
year they’re of the “rent one, get one
free” variety.
Other businesses find one type of
offer works best year after year. For
restaurants, it’s usually “buy one en
tree, get one free;” drycleaners
“clean one, clean one free.” For car
washes it’s “$1 off any car wash” and
for dentists its “$25 off the first visit
for any new patient.”
American Advertising says a local
merchant typically will contract for a
mailing of 10,000 to 15,000 coupons
at a cost of $400 per 10,000.
A clothing store offer of $5 off
any $20 purchase, according to
AAD, will generate about 70 custom
ers and from $2,000 to $4,000 in
sales.
WSRED
Adventures In Cartooning
by Don Atkinson Jr
SPADE PHILLIPS, PL
CHI*? UW
CllfRP -o
ctf/KP
cw c w^ e
QoACKj?
B-52’s still making crazy dance music
NEW YORK (AP) — Before the
B-52’s became rock stars, they were
friends. After 10 years and six al
bums, they’re still close. So close that
when guitarist Ricky Wilson died of
cancer in 1985, the four surviving
members stayed together.
“It seemed like at that moment we
weren’t going to continue,” said vo
calist Kate Pierson. “But we kept
hanging around together. We
helped each other. I just felt we kept
wanting to do music. Being friends,
we found a lot of strength in each
other.”
So close they need an outside pro
ducer because nobody wants to give
orders.
“We all have different strong
points, but there’s no leader,” Pier
son said.
“It's been a problem in some ways,
but creatively it’s good. Everybody is
more satisfied, no one’s left out. It’s
very laissez-faire; you can’t force cre-
atixity. The fact we all collaborate so
much is what gives us our unusual
sound."
They are rock’s most subversive
cartoon, spreading their message
under bouffant hairdos and giggly
vocals. The B-52’s combine the
inspired silliness of 1960s surf
groups with the social conciousness
of the folk-prote«t music that Pier
son performed in high school. Imag
ine The Flintstones warning against
deforestation or The Jetsons de
fending animal rights.
“Our influences are really eclec
tic,” Pierson said. “Stephen Foster.
Brazilian music. We’re really in
fluenced by Patti Smith and Captain
Beefheart. We’ve been influenced by
movie soundtracks, TV, it’s just in
the air.”
It all started at a Chinese restau
rant in Athens, Ga. Five friends —
Ricky Wilson, his sister, Cindy, Keith
Strickland, Fred Schneider and Pier
son. Five straws and one drink:
Flaming Volcano.
“We went to our friend Owen’s
house and started writing,” Strick
land said. “We had no notion of
starting a band. We just wound up at
his house because there were instru
ments and a tape recorder. Owen
went upstairs to write a letter, other
wise he would have been in the
band, too.
“We started playing at parties and
had great response. People wanted
us to play more. We would go to par
ties and dress up and be ridiculous.
The slang term for bouffant hairdo
was B-52 and that was what we called
ourselves. That’s the most calculated
thing we’ve ever done."
A self-proclaimed “trashy little
band,” the B-52’s quickly became a
faxorite of critics and dancers with
“Rock Lobster," “Dance the Mess
Around” and “Prix ate Idaho.”
"We had this perpetual inno
cence," Pierson said, “like the film
Born Yesterday.’ We still have this
enthusiasm, like xve just started. I
don’t feel jaded at all.”
For “Cosmic Thing,” their new al
bum, the B-52’s decided some strip
ping down was in order after mak
ing increasing use of studio effects
ox er the years.
“We xxanted to approach this as a
band," Pierson said, “not as a studio
album. The first two albums, we
played the stuff ourselves. We didn’t
overdub anything that xve couldn’t
do lix e.
“The next three albums:
more and more oxerdubs am
last record, ‘Bouncing off the
lites,’ was the most produced
were able to add layers of sc
and do some different mood:
noxv xve really have this urge to:
No more drum machines!"
Gravestones intriguing
for epitaph-hunting autho
NEW YORK (AP) — Gyles Bran-
dreth spends a lot of time prowling
about graveyards. With good reason.
As he obserxes: “I have always en
joyed xvalking around graveyards —
it’s not much fun being carried
round them — and reading the in
scriptions on the gravestones.”
When he finds an epitaph he
likes, he copies it down, and he’s co
pied a lot. Manx of them are in
cluded in “Famous Last Words &:
Tombstone Humor” (Sterling), an
interesting and often funny collec
tion not only of epitaphs hut of a di-
xerse selection of the last earthly
xvords of a x ariety of people.
They are so close that they need
an outside producer, because none
of them want to give orders to the
others.
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There’s some surprising
here. “Don’t worry, be happy
the message of a recent pop
song. But the phrase surface:
1925 when a guru named
Meher said it. Although Mehet
in 1969, “Don’t worry, behapp
regarded as his last words bet
after he said it in 1925, “heli®
silence for the next 44 years.’
Phineas T. Barnum, the imp
rio and showman, is reputed to
said these last words: “Howwere
circus receipts tonight at Mat
Square Garden?”
In the book’s collection ofr
stone epitaphs, there’s:
“Here lies Lester Moore
slugs from a 44, no Les, no mo:
“In memory of Mrs. Alpha'
Weight 309 lbs. Openwideve
enlx gates.”
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