Page 2/The Battalion/Wednesday, February 3, 1988 Opinion Say goodbye, Ed It’s time for U.S. Attorney General Ed Meese to resign or for Ronald Reagan to kick him out. The nation’s chief law enforcement officer continues to have embarrassing run-ins with the law he has sworn to uphold. Last year, he was accused of trying to influence the awarding of a government contract to a company in which he held stock. The latest fiasco involves a possible bribe to Israeli officials. Meese in 1985 received a memo that allegedly said payoffs to Israeli officials — particularly then-Prime Minister Shimon Peres — might be necessary to protect an oil pipeline to be built near the Israeli border. The project was abandoned before con struction began. Israeli officials deny any bribe was offered or accepted. But if it were, Meese could be indicted for bribery. As attorney gen eral, he also could be trouble if he knew 7 of the plot and didn’t stop it, a scenario that begins to resemble Iran-Contra in an un comfortable way. The Iran-Contra affair made “What did the president know and when did he know it?” an important question. In Meese’s seven years as attorney general, he has made the question “What did the attorney general know and w hen did he know it?” a com mon one. Meese says his involvement in the project was “entirely law ful,” and it may be that he did not violate the letter of the law. But the law’s spirit has taken a brutal beating during his tenure, and it’s time for the healing to begin. The Battalion Editorial Board The awful, biting truth about the CBS pit bull If the Columbia Broadcasting Sys tem has any sense of fairness, it will order Dan Rather to go for the t h r oats o f each and every presi dential candidate. Why should Vice President George Bush receive pref- erentail treat- ment? As a supporter Mike Royko of Paul Simon told me: “Oh, if only we could get Rather to publicly whip Paul that way. We’d jump 20 points in all the polls.” Yes, but what could Rather possibly attack Simon for? “Who cares? He could accuse him of wearing clip-on bow ties or secretly hav ing 20-20 vision without glasses. What’s the difference? All that counts is having Rather ripping, tearing, shredding your candidate. Beat on us, Dan, please, harder, harder.” He has a point. Almost overnight, Rather has become one of the most powerful political influences in Amer ica. One good flogging from him can send a candidate’s popularity soaring. It took him only a few grim minutes to turn a rich elitist like George Bush into a sympathetic character for millions of people who work for their paychecks. It might be the most fascinating de velopment of the campaigns, that a TV anchorcreature could have so dramatic an impact on political opinion. The question is why? So I asked a noted psychologist. Dr. I.M. Kooky, if he had any theories. “Of course,” he said, “the answer is obvious. In their subconscious minds, Dan Rather represents the single thing Americans fear most. And you must know what that is.” ' War? Famine? Disease? “No.” Then what is it? “I will tell you. The one single thing Americans fear most is the pit bull.” Really? “Yes, research shows that in recent years it has become even more frighten ing than the prospect of the TV conking out on Super Bowl Sunday.” But how does the fear of pit bulls re late to Rather? “Because when it goes after you, it is remorseless, without pity. It will not let go even if you offer it a whole box of Dog Yummies.” That does sound like Rather. “Sure. And look at the way Rather shows his teeth.” But he’s simply smiling. “A pit bidl shows its teeth, too. Do you call that smiling.” I see what you mean. “So what we have here is the Pit Bull Syndrome at work on the mass mind. — And George Bush was the poodle.” - The poodle? “Of course. The poodle is a nice dog, but it is an aristocrat, a pure bred, ■ rather snooty, so most people don’t like it, just like Bush. They also think the poodle is kind of a wimp, just like Bush. But the poodle does not frighten them, just like Bush. They just don’t want one, just like Bush.” An interesting analogy, although George Will said Bush was more of a lap dog. “George Will is a poodle, too, so what does he know? Shall I go on?” Please. “These millions of Americans turned on their TV sets and in their sub conscious they saw this well-groomed poodle. And suddenly it was being sav agely attacked by a pit bull.” A terrifying vision. “Yes, but there was a surprise in store. As a horrified nation watched, ex pecting a blood bath, they realized that the poodle was not fleeing. Nor did it cower. The poodle fiercely defended it self. In fact, it went on the attack.” You’re right. Vice President Poodle, er, Bush, became surprisingly aggres sive. He hasn’t been that macho since he boasted of kicking Ferraro’s fanny. “So, tell me, who do you think most people would cheer for, the poodle or the pit bull?” Hooray for the brave poodle! “Exactly, which is why CBS switch boards all over America w 7 ere swamped with pro-poodle calls.” But do you think that in his role as the national pit bull. Rather could have the same impact on the campaigns of other candidates? “Definitely. For example, Simon is sort of a friendly neighborhood mutt, and little old ladies would weep in his behalf.” Then it would be w 7 ise for the candi dates to demand a chance to be thrown into the pit with Rather. “Yes, but they must hurry.” W’hy? “He might be impounded at any mo ment for rabies tests.” Copyright 1987, Tribune Media Services, Inc. The Battalion (USPS 045 360) Member of Texas Press Association Southwest journalism Conference The Battalion Editorial Board Sue Krenek, Editor Daniel A. LaBry, Managing Editor Mark Nair, Opinion Page Editor Amy Couvillon, City Editor Robbyn L. Lister and Becky Weisenfels, News Editors Loyd Brumfield, Sports Editor Sam B. Myers, Photo Editor Editorial Policy The Battalion is a non-profit, self-supporting newspa per operated as a community service to Texas A&M and Bryan-College Station. Opinions expressed in The Battalion are those of the editorial board or the author, and do not necessarih rep resent the opinions of Texas A&M administrators, fac ulty or the Board of Regents. The Battalion also serves as a laboratory newspaper for students in reporting, editing and photography classes within the Department of Journalism. The Battalion is published Monday through Friday during Texas A&M regular semesters, except for holidav and examination periods. Mail subscriptions are $17.44 per semester, $34.62 per school tear and $36.44 per full year. Advertising rates furnished on request. Our address: The Battalion, 230 Reed McDonald. Texas A&M University, College Station, TX 77843-1 111. Second class postage paid at College Station, TX 77843. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to The Battal ion, 216 Reed McDonald. Texas A&M University, Col lege Station TX 77843-4 111. Raider of the lost corporations j. John MacDougall T. Boone Pick ens — an entre- preneurial hero or just another cor- porate raider? A former geologist turned indepen dent oil producer turned corporate icon, Pickens was on hand Friday at Rudder Audito rium before a ca- pacity audience to receive the Distin guished Entrepreneur Award given in honor of Harold L. Kupfer, Class of 1954. Pickens has made millions for his Mesa Limited Partnership (formerly Mesa Petroleum) hy hoarding stock in so-called “undervalued” companies, then selling back the stock to a jittery management at a hefty profit. In the world of hostile takeovers and corporate raiders, this tactic is called “greenmail.” Pickens began his career in the oil business 36 years ago as a junior geolog ist w'ith a major oil company before set ting out on his own as an independent oil producer. The rest is history. Based in Amarillo, Mesa grew by leaps and bounds — drilling for oil and gas all over the world. Pickens and other Mesa stockholders got rich. A $10,000 investment in Mesa in 1964 would have been parlayed into $300,000 today. Pickens turned Mesa Petroleum into a model company and now has a firm hand in the daily business operations. According to magazine reports, Pickens makes a point to meet all new employees at orientation. He has a preference for hiring younger employees. A self avowed health nut, Pickens built a com plete athletic facility for employees and has taken a militant stance against em ployees’ smoking. Unfortunately, Pickens’ entrepreneu- ral spirit has been overshadowed hv greedy takeover attempts, placing him in a category beside such dubious deal- makers as Carl Icahn (TWA), Robert Holmes a Court (Texaco) and Ronald Perelman (Revlon). As an advocate of shareholders’ rights, Pickens states that American management has become in sensitive to the demands of stockhold ers. Pickens knows that management's goals aren’t always in line with maximiz ing the wealth of current owners. Man agement has more immediate selfish motives that don’t always contribute to increasing the value of company stock. Ultimately though, management — especially corporate officers — is re sponsible to company owners. If man agers do their jobs well, they will keep the hounds away from the company door. If they screw up and stock prices nosedive, these companies may find themselves as subsidiaries of Beatrice but oftentimes not before a nasty take over fight. These battles degrade into ugly skirmishes that are windfalls to Wall Street lawyers and wing-tipped in vestment bankers. The losers in a hostile fakeovers zap a company’s equityi targeted companies create "poisonr to prevent themselves from being; bled up bv a bigger fish (orinthecast Mesa, a minnow). The pills can takei form of issuance of new stock or ext* sive severances for management ini) event of a buyout. Pickens is master of the lab game. In 1985 he tried tobuyouib cal, but backed off after Unocal’sr agement of fered him a huge sunj money f or Mesa’s stot kholdingsini cal. The deal netted Mesa $83 In 1984 Pickens made a cool $218b lion on a hid for Gulf that cult the oil giant being purchased by dard Oil Company. All these dealt! fine and dandy in our free en economv. But Pickens is brash enoi to climb a soapbox against greenm One should seriously doubt hisi tions to operate the companiesint he has purchased blocks of stock, cord is tattooed by hit and ruuattem to run up the price of target comp; stock, only to sell out quickly, most recent attempts at purdiai chunks of Boeing, Singer and Newt Mining indicate that he still hope!! make a quick buck In intimidating (I management of these companies. To make Pickens worthy of Kupfer award, we should change: name from the “Distinguished En preneur Award” to the “Distinguiilj Corporate Raider Award.” Has a,i ring to it. takeover are the little guys whose jobs are axed to help def ray the cost of stock John MacDougall is a graduatestu repurchases and “golden parachutes.” and a columnist for The BaUaYum. P&RUN&, HAVE '/00 £EEN PISAGREEIN& 'NtW THE VRESEtW ON CENTRAL AHEWCN AGNN7 .®)