Page 2/The Battalion/Thursday, December 3, 1987
Opinion
columnist’s Wish List of Christmas hopes!?
The Christmas
Wish List:
• I wish people
would stop calling
Brian Frederick a
communist. I
think he does a
good job of breaks
ing the mold of in
effective govern
ment ideas.
Granted, his
ideas are unortho-
DA
Jensen
dox, but at least they offer some alterna
tives to the programs currently in use. It
is painfully obvious that many current
government programs are woefully in
adequate. The welfare system pays peo
ple to be unproductive. The education
system caters only to the most promising
students. The prison system doesn’t in
carcerate criminals. A good look at a few
of these programs leads me to believe
that it is time to break out of the govern
ment program rut.
• I wish the government would stop
trying to save the world.
I realize we have a certain obligation
. to police the world as the guardians of
democracy, and all that is right and
good but I think we should start at
home. While we send money and food
all over the world there are people
starving in our backyard. There is a lack
of food, housing and health care in the
United States. If we cannot solve our
own problems, how can we expect to
solve everyone else’s? I think if we try to
improve the condition of this country,
we will be better able to help other coun
tries.
• I wish people would really get into
the Christmas spirit of giving.
During the Christmas season many
people need the support of the commu
nity. A worthwhile gift is one of self.
Mail Call
Screaming bias
‘The
EDITOR:
I was disturbed to see that McFadden Hall intends to show the Film
Silent Scream” as part of a program titled “Abortion: Yes or No? You
decide.” The title of the program implies that both sides of the issue will be
represented. However, anyone familiar with “The Silent Scream” knows that
this Film was once used by anti-abortion groups to intimidate women seeking
abortions.
McFadden Hall has misled the public by using such an innocous title and
should title future programs more appropriately.
Elaine Wendt ’88
Excellence in parking
EDITOR:
I would like to commend a certain Aggie who has a real talent for
parking. Of course, that person should be an expert by now — my taupe
Chevy Celebrity was in the slot next to the one used for practice a few weeks
ago.
I know not who the person was who decided to test my paint job — which
had just been redone last fall because someone backed into the car — for that
considerate individual forgot to leave a note on my windshield to let me know
that he was so much as sorry that he practiced parking too close to my car.
The damage is minimal, just a 10-inch long, deep scratch and dent on the
back panel on the driver’s side and some missing trim - but the rust that will
now be able to attack my car will be expensive for me to fix. I already have a
hard time making ends meet.
Thanks again to the considerate culprit! I hope you are proud of your
artwork. I only hope I don’t accidently park too close to your car someday.
Carol Martin ’90
Just say no to Ol' Sarge II
EDITOR:
I would like to take this opportunity to personally thank the 1139-plus
students and former students who took the time to read and sign my petition
opposing the Ol’ Sarge idea. For those of you who did not have the
opportunity to see the petition, it read as follows:
To whom it may concern:
The people whose names appear on the following pages find it in the
better interest of Texas A&M University and its traditions not to create a
seven-foot “Of Sarge” mascot costume to parade up and down the alumni
side of Kyle Field. We feel that this would overshadow our first and only
mascot, Reveille, and in turn receive more television coverage in any sports
event which he would attend. Texas A&M is unique in the fact that we are not
like any other university by having a meretricious, oversized caricature on
our sidelines. We do, however, understand the need and desire of the alumni
to be led with the student body in the yells and hope the problem will be
solved in another fashion.
Perry A. Liston, II ’90
Illogical bike policy
EDITOR:
I decided to take this time to write about the latest policy of our beloved
University Police.
About two weeks ago, I saw little yellow slips affixed to various bicycles
around the Architecture Center. They desribed how University regulations
state that bicycles shall not be chained to shrubs, architectual structures, or
appear abandoned or they will be towed! Owner to bear lock removal
expense, of course. There are two flaws to this policy. One: Bicycle rack
shortage! There arre numerous places on campus that could do with more
racks, such as Langford Building, Reed McDonald, Sbisa, and various others.
Two: How to reclaim your bike after it has been impounded. To get your
bike, you must register it. Describing your bike’s appearance is not proof
enough. So, therefore, one your bike is impounded, chances are, you’re out
one bike.
Once again, University policies trip themselves up in their illogical
structure.
Jeff Frank ’91
Letters to the editor should not exceed 300 words in length. The editorial staff reserves the right to edit letters
for style and length, but will make every effort to maintain the author’s intent. Each letter must be signed and
must include the classification, address and telephone number of the writer.
The Battalion
The gift of time doesn’t cost much, but
the reward of self-satisfaction is bounti
ful. It only takes an hour to give blood.
It only takes an afternoon to volunteer
at a local food bank.
• I wish there was a solution to dis
crimination. I hate it. I despise silly men
who insist on “a back hand” to prove
their superiority. I detest apartheid.
• I wish people would accept the
right of journalists to gather and report
information.
I get tired of hearing cries of invasion
from legitimate news sources. Just think
of a world without journalism. There
would be no network for the transfer of
information. We would go back to the
dark ages of censorship.
• I wish I could pay someone to do
my Christmas shopping for me.
I usually save my shopping until the
last minute when the crowds are rude
and unbearable. I don’t enjoy being
pushed and shoved. I would gladly pay
to have this experience taken off my
hands. As an alternative I would like to
see people be kind to their fellow shop
pers.
• I wish there was a book of unlim
ited column ideas. Writing a column ev
ery week is the hardest thing I’ve ever
done. It may look easy, but I assure you
it is tough to be intelligent or witty every
week.
• I wish the presidential candidates
would stop throwing stones at each
other. I haven’t decided if this is their
tactic to divert attention from real issues
so they don’t have to commit to a partic
ular viewpoint or if they just lack the
self-confidence to stand on their own
merits next to other good candidates.
• I wish there was a way to convince
terrorists that their activities only make
them look stupid and inhumane. Blow
ing people up or holding them as a hos
tage does
cause.
not do a lot to promote a
• As my final wish I would like to see
the return of the family unit. It suprises
me to see many families falling apart be
cause they aren’t willing to weather the
hard times together. Many family mem
bers stop helping each other because
they aren’t getting enough in return
The Christmas season is the perfect
AUS'
ji-Am
mem
ay sue
disc
rsities
The
dense
time to put aside family differences and
think about giving instead of receiving.
I want a lot of things for Christmas,
doubt I’ll get any of the above things,
but there is always that air of hopedur
ing this season. I’ll be happy that 1 cat
still hope. There are many people in this
country who don’t have that capacity,
D. A. Jensen is a senior journalism m
for and a columnist for The Battalion, f tim
sity
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Some air travelers need
‘incompetent flier’ program
I’m always goof
ing up when I fly.
Sometimes I for
get to bring my
seat back to its
original locked
and upright posi
tion for takeoff
and landings.
Probably the
worst thing I do
when I fly, how
ever, is in the un-
we can’t Figure out how to get the 3:13
flight to Kansas City in the air before
5:30.
compuii
After sitting in my unmoving seat for
nearly an hour, I had to go to the bath
room.
Lewis
Grizzard
Bad timing has been my entire life
story.
I was inside the restroom maybe 11
seconds, when there was a loud banging
on the door.
She even showed me
printout of the dictum.
Certainly the flight attendant wasju
doing her job, but I had to wonder: b
really all that important that a flight
held up a few more seconds because
paying customer has to go to the
room in light of the horrendous on titt I
performance of the airlines and thefi
that airplanes are coming closer a» 1
closer to running into each other
30,000 feet?
likely event there is a loss of cabin pres
sure, I don’t breathe normally when I
place the oxygen mask over my head
and face. I breathe Secretariat down the
stretch.
“Sir! Sir!” cried a female voice, ob
viously that of one of the flight atten
dants, “we can’t pull back from the gate
while you’re in there.”
The other day, I goofed up somthing
new. I boarded my flight a few minutes
before it was scheduled to take off.
Wait a second. We’d been sitting here
all this time, and as soon as I get inside
the restroom they can’t wait a few more
seconds so nature can take its couse?
When it came time to push back from
the gate, however, the plane just sat
there. The last time an airplane pushed
back from the gate on time was when
Wilbur and Orville lugged their flying
contraption out of their workshed in
Kitty Hawk.
I’m not sure why my flight didn’t
push back on time. Perhaps the pilot
wasn’t in the mood or one of the flight
attendants had broken a nail.
We can send a man to the moon, but
I hurried as fast as I could and then
returned to my seat as all the other pas
sengers stared at me.
I could hear their thoughts:
“Nice going, weak-bladder.”
After we finally had taken off, one of
the flight attendants came to my seat
and apologized.
“It’s a new directive we just got from
the FAA,” she explained. “We can’t
push back until everyone is seated.”
Where could all this lead? Do we ha 1 !
to start raising our hands to go to
bathroom while the plane is on
ground?
“OK, 14B,” the flight attendantmif |
say, “you can be excused but raafe *
snappy.”
Some things can’t be accomplish
snappily, especially if there is press' 1 !
that one might hold up an entire
1011.
Of course, something like this d 1 1
give the airlines another excuse for J
ing late.
“Sorry, folks,” the pilot could
“We could have been on time if 14f
remembered to go to the bathroom'
fore he left home.”
Copyright 1987, Cowles Syndicate
BLOOM COUNTY
by Berke Breath*
(USPS 045 360)
Member of
Texas Press Association
Southwest Journalism Conference
The Battalion Editorial Board
Sondra Pickard, Editor
John Jarvis, Managing Editor
Sue Krenek, Opinion Page Editor
Rodney Rather, City Editor
Robbyn Lister, News Editor
Loyd Brumfield, Sports Editor
Tracy Staton, Photo Editor
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