Page 2/The Battalion/Wednesday, May 13, 1987
Opinion
Reagan week:
The time is the
near future. The
scene is an office
in a huge
American firm.
An executive
secretary
announces that an
employee is
waiting outside.
The employee
enters and the two
men shake hands.
“What’s up?” the executive asks. “I
won’t be here next week.” the employee
says. “I’m taking my Ronald Reagan
week.”
Richard
Cohen
The executive’s head slumps. He
looks at his schedule. He scans
upcoming orders. “I can’t stop you, of
course,” he says. “It’s the law. You’re
entitled. But this is going to be one hell
of a week. Can you put it off ?” T he
employee shakes his head. “I’ve made
all the appointments. The room is
booked. My wife and son are going with
me. It’s Ronald Reagan week for her,
too.”
Here we must pause to explain what
Ronald Reagan week is and what the
employee is planning to do. He will go
to a resort, in this case one in the Catskill
Mountains. It offers horseback riding,
golf, tennis and entertainment at night.
But the real purpose of the week is tests.
Under t he law, the employee will be
tested one day for (1) AIDS, another
day for (2) drug usage, (3) instructed in
religious values and, sometime later, (4)
polygraphed to see if he is lying about
(1) AIDS, (2) drugs (3) religious
conviction or (4) anthing else.
thing started soon after Ronald Reagan
left the White House. By then, his
administration had instituted so many
tests for so many things that American
employers were complaining about lost
time and — that dreaded word — lost
productivity. The testing had been
haphazard. One day an employee would
be tested for drug use, marched to the
bathroom and asked to perform. For
some people, what should have been a
15-minute procedure took hours. Some
insisted on taking magazines with them
and, in a test case, this was permitted
under the law.
AIDS testing took place on different
days. Like drug testing, this, too, took
more time than envisioned. Some
employees had to be tested again and
again. Blood samples were occasionally
mixed up in the lab; some were labeled
incorrectly and in some cases the the
tests were just poorly administered. The
Government Accounting Office said the
economy was losing 1.3 trillion man
hours annually just for AIDS testing,
worth 1.8 billion in American dollars.or
49.6 trillion Japanese yen. Not only that,
housing starts were down.
A Democratic study group came up
with the solution. Democratic members
of-Congress realized they could not
buck the tide towards more testing.
Some of them noted bitingly that an
administration that had promised to get
government off the backs of the people
was now marching them by the millions
to the bathroom. But polls showed
support f or the tests. The Democrats
decided to condense all the testing into
one week — and have the government
pay for it under Medicare.
The tradition of granting every
American worker a single week in which
to be tested for almost every conceivable
Soon, resorts sprung up just for the
purpose of testing. Medicare paid a
minimum amount, but with a little extra
Friendship doesn’t always
preclude romance
The old adage
“we’re just
friends” is a
misnomer that
prevents a lot of
relationships from
blooming into
something
wonderful.
Single people
are always looking
for that “special”
Daniel A.
La Bry
Guest
Columnist
person with an
irresistible body,
nice car and good personality. Forget
the last two — it’s usually just an
irresistible body. Spontaneous
relationships are usually for emotional
contact, sexual fulfillment, emotional
support, sexual fulfillment and sexual
fulfillment. That’s why they often last
only a few weeks, few days or even one
night.
The thought of having a relationship
with your f riend is crazy. Hey, they’re
“just a friend,” right?
What about these famous last words:
“I’ll JUST sleep five more minutes.”
“I’ll JUST have one more beer.”
“I’ll JUST stay another 15 minutes.”
Sound familiar? That same word
pops up a lot —JUST.
This word should automatically ring
a bell. It hardly ever works.
People always ask, “Why ruin a good
friendship by becoming romantically
involved?”
Why not develop a great relationship
instead of kill a good f riendship?
I’ve been dating my friend for almost
three years now. We were “just friends”
for more than three years before we
started dating. By the time we realized
how much we really liked each other, it
was too late to try all those little games
you woidd try with a new boyfriend or
girlfriend. We didn’t have to put on an
act to impress each other. We already
knew what the other was like. There was
no jealousy when one wanted to be with
other friends — we were used to it. We
learned to live and let live.
You accept your friends for who they
are. That’s why you’re friends in the
first place—you like them. In a
romantic relationship, little things drive
the two people apart. You don’t like the
way they dress, their ugly teeth, their
big feet and so on. But in a friend, you
overlook these things. Besides, they’re
“just a friend.” When there aren’t any
expectations of romance, their quirks
don’t really bother you.
Friends are easier to talk to. You’ve
already talked about who you were
going out with, what you liked about
your dates, what you didn’t like about
your dates, what you look forward to
and what you don’t look forward to.
Friends have time to develop a special
trust. You’ve had long, late-night
conversations about everything from
family problems to school problems to
sexual experiences. Romance usually
sets up a blockade for free expression.
Cultivating romance with friendship
destrys that blockade. You’ve flirted and
joked about sex before because there
weren’t any strings attached; so when a
romantic relationship starts, talking
about sex comes naturally.
Friendships provide an alternate path
w'ithout all the obstacles like
anticipation, thoughts of rejection or
the fear of falling off “cloud nine.”
Friends who get romantically
involved feel a lot more secure than two
people who met at a bar.
Letting friendship develop into a
relationship is a long road, but a much
smoother ride.
Trust me, I know. I’m marrying my
friend of almost seven years on May 23.
And engraved on our wedding
invitations: “This day I will marry my
friend.”
Daniel A. La Bry is a senior journalism
major.
The Battalion
(USPS 045 360)
Member of
Texas Press Association
Southwest Joiirnalisni Conference
The Battalion Editorial Board
Sondra Pickard. Editor
John Jarvis, Managing Editor
Marybeth Rohsner, Opinion Page Editor
Rodney Rather, City Editor
Robbyn L. Lister, News Editor
Loyd Brumfield. Sports Editor
Tracy Staton, Photo Editor
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Bring your own bottle
contributed by the employee, all the
usual resort activities were available.
(Fees for corporate executives were paid
by their firms.) Some of the really fancy
ones had stunning polygraph rooms
that were featured in Architectural
Digest. T here, you could he
polygraphed and get a facial at the same
time. The best places provided massages
and pedicures. One person would work
on your toes while, at your head, a
government employee would ask you
questions.
At that point. President William
Bennett stepped in. Since as education
secretary he had called for the testing of
everyone for everything, he could not
oppose the Democratic program. He
could insist, though, that Ronald
Reagan week not be value-free. For this
reason, he insisted that at least one day
be devoted to religious instruction. The
Supreme Court, in a 5-4 decision,
approved, but only on the condition
that Medicare not foot the bill. Once
again, American free enterprise
responded. 1 esting resorts forsecul
humanists sprung up overnight;im®|
those for fundamentalist ChristiaibB ^ (u .
The latter did not offer pedicures. .1, anc
1 his is how Ronald Reagan wee! sc
became an American institution,!! * Jl ' |
why, one day, an employee told hi™
■ichea
that he was taking a week off. "Witt tor oft
are \ou going f or your week?”the iky dep
emplovee asked his boss. “TheneiT Lons
Disney Festing Center,” the boss v a . 1 "* I ' w
non las
Const r
“It’s all Mickev Mouse anyway.
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Mail Call
Student service fees a joke
EDITOR:
Wisenbaker, not Walker
Editor:
I am writing because I am both appalled and angered
by the shoddy way in which student services on this
campus are run. After hearing many horror stories about
the poor quality of the services at the “quack shack” I
finally experienced a “horror story” of my own.
It was an honor to he asked by the Muster commitlti
speak for the campus Muster on April 21.1 would,
however, like to clear up one item that appeared in (he
biographical sketch in the program.
After the death of a very dear friend I was in a state of
shock, and on the advice of a friend I went to the
infirmary. After waiting for nearly two hours, I finally got
in to see a doctor whose very first words to me were “I’m
not giving you any sedatives!” He treated me as if I were a
criminal and talked to me in a nasty, condescending tone
of voice. Then he prescribed two weeks of an
antidepressant which he said would not even take effect
for two weeks. All it did was give me a very dry mouth and
severe constipation, and after looking it up in a medical
journal that said it was not recommended, I stopped
taking it.
The program stated that 1 was the founder of the
President’s Endowed Scholars Program ;it Texas A1MI
University. The truth is that one of our regents, Royce
Wisenbaker, Class of’39, was the founder and the
inspiration behind the President’s Endowed Scholars
Program. I would not want to take any c redit away fro®
Mr. Wisenbaker for this important program.
Robert L. Walker
T exas A&M vice president lor development
Liberals, go home
EDITOR:
After suffering with a continued sense of loss and grief
for several weeks I tried making an appointment at the
counseling center. I was told that I would have to wait five
days for my appointment and that I must come in 30
minutes early in order to fill out some forms and listen to a
tape recording. One of the problems I have been
experiencing is chronic insomnia, and since I hadn’t been
able to get to sleep before 6:30 that morning, I overslept
and rushed to get to the counseling center just in time for
my appointment. Upon arriving I was told that since I
hadn’t gotten there in time to fill out the forms
beforehand I would not be allowed to keep the
appointment and would have to reschedule for another
day. Even though 1 was on time for the appointment, I was
not allowed to keep it.
1 want to echo the letter of Jon Watts in the' May
Battulion. Though our institution is one of the finestinD
world, there are many other fine universities. My quest 1
like Jon, is why do people come to this school if they
the traditions so much? Back in 1976 when 1 was trying
select a university to attend, I visited A&M lot aweeke®
I went to midnight yell practice, an Aggie footballgaiw
etc. I got a tremendous chill up my spine when theFigli' 1
Texas Aggie Band played at halftime. There wasareal
sense of unity among the students. It was obvious to nit
that this school was like no other, and 1 loved it. I cleckte
at that point to attend, and am now a proud former
student.
It certainly is a good thing that I am not suicidal,
because as a student, I cannot afford to pay f or profesional
help. It is obvious to me that the fees I pay for student
services here at Texas A&M are a waste of money. The
system here is a joke, and I, for one, am not laughing.
1 believe that the Pallmeyers and Sullivans of this
school have a childish need for attention and the waytltf
get it is by stirring tip controversy. Why don’t you peopk
transfer toother more liberal universities that have no
traditions? I know why. There are so many of yourtypp
running around at those schools that you’d he lost inti®
shuffle, no one would notice you.
\
“We
usl
I know that I am only one of many students who have
experienced this inability of the university to meet the
needs of its students. This is a very serious problem and I
urge other students to speak out about this issue so that the
school is compelled to do something about it.
Dina M. Samfield, graduate student
If things keep going the way they have lately,fexas
A&M will be just another university.
Fred Wells ’81
Letters to the editor should not exceed 300 words in length. The editorinlstltS
reserves the right to edit letters for style and length, hut will nutlte evert
maintain the author's intent. Each letter must he signed and must nnhelt’thi
classification, address and telephone nutnher of the writer.