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National
THE BATTALION Page
THURSDAY, DECEMBER 10, 1981
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United Press International
WASHINGTON — A “jail-
house lawyer,” with a reputation
for working harder than any pris
oner in American history to chal
lenge his confinement, is in trou
ble for his campaign to flood the
courts with appeals.
Clovis Carl Green, who has
filed more than 700 complaints
from his jail cell without legal
assistance, was warned by a feder
al appeals court Tuesday to stop
his paper blizzard of frivolous
appeals — for his own good.
Green is incarcerated at the
federal prison in Anthony.
The U.S. Court of Appeals for
the District of Columbia ordered
Green — “in all likelihood the
most prolific prisoner litigant in
recorded history” — to put away
his typewriter unless he comes up
with a legitimate beef.
If not, they threatened him
point-blank with spending more
time in jail for contempt of court.
“Ironically, Green appears to
be his own worst enemy,” wrote
the court. “Green’s 10-year sent
ence for rape, imposed by the
Jackson County, Missouri, circuit
court in 1975, apparently was
completed in 1980.
“(He) would be a free man today
were it not for the several sent
ences the (Missouri) district court
imposed for contempt convictions
in 1978 and 1979 stemming from
Green’s writ-writing and jailhouse
lawyering ‘on behalf of his fellow
inmates.”
The appeals court decision was
handed down the same day the
Supreme Court heard oral argu
ments in a case that centers pre
cisely on whether felons should be
allowed to appeal their convic
tions indefinitely.
Green’s appeals — dismissed
almost without exception as frivo
lous, malicious and repetitive —
are well-known in courts across
the nation, especially in Washing
ton, D.C., Missouri and Texas.
They cost him nothing to file
under his status as an indigent
prisoner, but they eat up the time
and patience of clerks and judges.
In a rare exception Tuesday, the
Washington appeals court found
merit in one of Green’s pleas.
The three-judge panel handed
down a 16-page order saving him
from a lower court ruling that
would have barred him from filing
any more appeals in that court un
less he could post a $100 security
for each.
The appeals court ruled it
would have denied him his consti
tutional right of access to the
courts.
Most of Green’s appeals chal
lenge the terms and condition of
his confinement, including the
rights and activities of a church he
claims to have founded behind
prison walls.
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Fields’ gadgets
aimed to please
the chickadees
United Press International
LOS ANGELES — W.C.
Fields died 35 years ago this
Christmas — a holiday the caustic
1 comic detested — but in many
ways, he lives on in the gewgaws
and gadgets capitalizing on his
boozy drollery and famous voice.
Instead of ringing, the tele
phone murmurs in a familiar bibu
lous drone, “Ah yaasss, my little
chickadee. ”
W.C. Fields is not dead, just on
hold.
The telephone that speaks with
his voice is just one of an outpour
ing of gadgets memorializing the
comedian.
Fields’ heirs are discovering
the truth in one of the comic’s
famous maxims:
“Where there’s a will, prosper
ity is just around the corner.”
Although Fields died 35 years
ago, the demand for Fields-
oriented items still is growing.
More than 30 licenses have
been granted to use the comic’s
likeness, Roger Richman, agent
for W.C. Field Productions, said.
The company was formed a few
years ago by Field’s heirs.
The items include everything
from aprons and ice buckets to re
cordings preserving the Fields
brand of black humor, such as:
“Anything worth having is
worth cheating for. ”
And the immortal:
“Anyone who hates children
and dogs can’t be all bad.”
The Fields telephone, to go on
sale this summer, uses a tape-
recorded simulation of Fields’ dis
tinctive voice. It alerts the owner
to a call by opening with Fields’
famous line to Mae West and con
tinuing with:
“This infernal device wishes to
chew your ear.”
On the second ring:
“Move with alacrity.”
On the third:
“Tarry no longer — no longer, I
say.”
Surely the product most likely
to please the shade of W.C. —
who prided himself on his con
sumption of martinis (“Get me a
sedative with an olive in it”) —
would be W.C. Fields Private
Stock Gin.
At 100 proof, it is stronger than
any other gin on the market, the
makers claim.
For some reason, the gin, and a
companion vodka, are currently
sold only in the city of Las Vegas
and the state of Washington. That,
as Fields would say, might as well
be Lompoc.
There’s an after-shave to be
marketed in a hip flask — “The -
chickadees will flock to the scent”
— and a battery tester (the nose
glows crimson if the battery is
good).
Even the government joined
the parade by issuing a W.C.
Fields postage stamp in January
1980 — the 100th anniversary of
Fields’ birth. The Postal Service
paid a $2,000 royalty for the spin
off merchandising rights.
Under discussion, according to
Richman, are a chain of W.C.
Fields franchised saloons, a comic
strip, a Broadway show and a TV
retrospective using film from
Field’s career.
Today s almanac
efeller to be vice president of the
United States.
A thought for the day: American
poet Emily Dickinson said: “Suc
cess is counted sweetest by those
who never succeed.”
it
rs.
We’ve Got
THE TOUCH!
See what’s in
thursday’s
Focus
.MvW COOKBOOK
“Cooking for the Total Aggie”
contains over 200 state, national, and international recipes
from various Texas A&M University parties. Available at
the MSC Bookstore for 88.95 or send check for 810.50.
(includes postage and handling) to Veronica Press
P.O. Box 42075
Cincinnati, OH. 45242
MAKES AJV EXCELLENT CHRISTMAS GIFT
Rule changes may avert silver crisis
United Press International
Today is Thursday, Dec. 10, the
344th day of 1981 with 21 to
follow.
Those born on this date are
under the sign of Sagittarius.
American poet Emily Dickinson
was horn Dec. 10, 1830.
On this date in history:
In 1817, Mississippi was admit
ted to the Union as the 20th state.
In 1898, Spain signed a treaty
officially ending the Spanish-
American War. The treaty gave
Guam, Puerto Rico and the Phi
lippines to the United States.
In 1941, Japanese troops landed
on northern Luzon in the Philip
pines in the early days of World
War II in the Pacific theater.
In 1974, the Senate confirmed
the nomination of Nelson Rock-
United Press International
WASHINGTON — A House
committee has recommended
several changes in federal reg
ulation of commodity markets
with an eye to averting the kind
of events that led to last year’s
silver crisis.
The 21 to 13 vote by the Gov
ernment Operations panel
Tuesday was split along party
lines with only one Republican,
Rep. Lyle Williams of Ohio, en
dorsing the unreleased report.
The report will not be available
for two days to permit dissent
ing views to be included.
Public and government
attention turned toward the
world commodity futures mar
kets in early 1980 when prices
for the precious metal climbed
to record levels — over $50 an
ounce — and then plummeted
sharply. Tuesday’s silver price
in New York was $8.88 an
ounce.
A congressional source famil
iar with the report described it
as very critical of the commodi
ty exchanges mainly because of
their lenient financial require
ment rules, which the commit
tee said encouraged specula
tion.
Two of the major figures in
the crisis, Texas financiers Nel
son Bunker Hunt and Herbert
Hunt, have sent their own re
port to a separate House panel
that blames five major commod
ity trading companies for the sil
ver price collapse.
Herbert Hunt issued a state
ment in Dallas Tuesday react
ing to news accounts about the
committee report, although a
spokesman said Hunt had not
see the full document.
“The allegation ... that my
brother and I attempted to cor
ner the silver market is false and
we have provided numerous
documents to government
agencies to establish this fact,”
Hunt said.
“The collapse of silver prices
was caused by exchange board
governors protecting the in
terests of five major commodity
trading companies who were on
the brink of bankruptcy.”
The operations committee
report also criticizes several
government agencies — includ
ing the Federal Reserve Board,
the Securities and Exchange
Commission and the Commodi
ty Futures Trading Commission
— for their lack of coordination
in dealing with the crisis.
It recommends an improved
federal interagency participa- |
tion in regulating the markets, a t
CFTC investigation of whether i
commodity exchange board'
members should be permitted ^
to trade in commodities that |
they regulate and the establish- ,
ment of investor margins at the ,
exchanges to reduce specula
tive abuses.
Silver prices quickly fell in i'
1980 from a high of $50 an ounce
to $10.80, seriously damaging i 1
the Hunt brothers financially
and several Wall Street broker- )
age firms doing business with ,
them. i
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