Viewpoint
Sorralion
The Battalion
Texas A&M University
Tuesday
February 13, 1979
Slouch
By Jim Earle
INC ON THE GRASS WOULD BE IF OIL WAS DISCOV
ERED UNDER THE MSC?”
New seniority system-
reform and subvert
By ARNOLD SAWISLAK
United Press International
WASHINGTON — What goes on in this
town sometimes defies description in the
tepid prose of contemporary journalism.
Only the rhetorical fashion of a time gone
by seems adequate to explain some things.
Example. The House of Representatives
changed its rules to permit committee
members to elect their own chairmen in
stead of giving the chairmanship automati
cally to the most senior member of the
committee. This was supposed to provide a
check on committee chairmen who abused
their authority and ignored the wishes of
committee members.
But this year a liberal junior member
upset a moderate senior member for a sub
committee membership. It turned out that
a number of the junior member’s votes
came from colleagues for whom he raised
campaign funds last fall.
This new wrinkle in the fabric of congres
sional reform seemed to require more than
a routine explanation. Finding a proper
commentator was easy. So with with trepi
dation and apologies to Finley Peter
Dunne, we will try to move back in time to
a saloon in Chicago, where a lone customer
and a bartender are discussing the events of
the day.
($)
50 new ways
to leave your lover
By DICK WEST
WASHINGTON — Mr. Marvin, meet
Mr. Simon.
The party of the first part is Lee Marvin,
famous actor who has been sued by his
ex-mistress for half of the property he ac
quired while they were living together.
According to testimony at the celebrated
trial in Los Angeles, Marvin occasionally
asked his attorney, “How do I get rid of this
broad?”
The party of the second part is Paul Si
mon, famous singer and composer whose
many hits include a song called “There
Where will it all end? In the Supreme
Court, most likely. Meanwhile, if Paul
Simon is as sharp as I think he is, he will
record a sequel to “There Must Be 50 Ways
To Leave Your Lover.”
Rattling his newspaper, Mr. Hennessy
announced: “The House iv Raypresenta-
tives has rayformed itself. ”
Mr. Dooley took the news with remark
able calm: “You don’t say so, Mr. Hinnissy.
Is it thimselves that is telling us that?”
“No. ‘tis the Washington correspondent
of the Traybune that says so. He says they
have given up the seenjority system that
has bred so many tyrants and are going to
ilict committee cheermen by the same
dimmycratic system of majority rule as
dieted them to Congress.”
“Well, I hope they ain’t relying on the
dimmycratic system in this ward,” Mr.
Dooley said withn a flick of his bar rag. “We
got the most pure of seenjority systems —
the candy date that can vote the oldest
ghosts wins the iliction.”
Hennessy went back to his paper. Soon
he looked up again: “Oh, but there is a
hitch, Mr. Dooley. The rayform is being
soob-verted, the Washington corre
spondent says. Members of the committees
are ousting the wrong men — committee
cheermen who niver did a thing to offend
good taste and the dimmycratic processes. ”
“Why are they doin’ that, Hinnissy?”
“Well, it seems one of the rayforming
raypresentatives, a young fella with not
much senjority but an itch to raise his own
estate in the world, went out and raised a
pot of money from his friends of a like dis
position for rayforming Congress wicked
ways.
“Thin he distributed the proceeds to his
fella committee members fer campaign
purposes. Thim that got re-ilicted naturally
began to see the advantages of rayform over
seenjority. So when their bennyfactor the
rayforming raypresentative ran for cheer-
man, they rayformed the incoombent, who
the Washington correspondent says has
both seenjority and merit but not much to
offer in the way of campaign funds.”
“So there ye are, Hinnissy,” said Mr.
Dooley.
“Where am I?” said Hennessy with a
puzzled look.
“Why man, ye’re at the thrishold of two
defynitions ... of rayform and of soob-
version of rayform.”
“And them are?”
“Rayform is fixing something that ain’t
working the way you want it to. Soob-
version of rayform is fixing something you
don’t think is broke.”
I don’t mean merely updating the lyrics
with such lines as “Just jump aboard ship.
Flip” or “Just take to your feet, Pete.”
I’m talking about a whole new song,
which also should be a big hit and which
would be called “There Must Be 50 Ways
To Sue Your Lover.”
Talk with Dr. Miller
P.E. system backward
Humor
Some of the lines would virtually write
themselves. For instance, the obligatory
reference to the Marvin trial could be:
“Make him post bail, Michelle.”
Mvxst Be 50 Ways To Leave Your Lover.”
One line in the song advises, “Just turn
in the key, Lee.”
I don’t know whether Lee Marvin was
familiar with those lyrics or how he finally
left his lover, Michelle Triola Marvin. But
obviously the procedure he followed wasn’t
as simple as Simon made it sound.
Indeed, Simon to the contrary, the Mar
vin case may be a threat to every Lee who
turns in his key, to every Gus who hops on a
bus, to every Jack who slips out the back, to
every Roy who doesn’t try to be coy and to
every Stan who gets a new plan.
Already, a woman named Penelope
McCall has filed a $1 million, Marvin-type
suit against rock star Peter Frampton, and
Kayatana Harrison is suing comedian Flip
Wilson for a like amount on similar
grounds.
If Simon needs any additional help in
doing for jilted ladies what he already has
done for their exiting paramours, here are a
few other suggested lyrics:
ite
Just litigate, Kate.”
Make it into a case, Grace.”
Prefer a large claim, Marne.”
Have your lawyer appeal, Lucille.”
Get a bank garnishee, Marie.”
Put him under arrest, Bess.”
Get a lien on his home, Joan.”
File a couple of pleas, Louise.”
Give the jury your charge, Marg. ”
Throw his tail into jail, Raquel.”
Ask the judge to arraign, Elaine.”
Grab his estate by escheat, Marguer-
Editor:
We would like to express our complete disgust with the P.E. department’s back
ward registration system. Is this a true reflection of their logic?
Why has the P.E. department not followed the other departments’ registration
procedure? Would it nof be possible to offer the specific P.E. courses in the catalogue
and have your selection printed along with the other courses on your schedule?
This would eliminate long lines encountered when picking up additional P.E.
registration cards and save the students as well as the P.E. staff unnecessary spent
time required by the present system.
No wonder T-sips are under the illusion that AGGIES do everything backwards!
—^Jonathan Stuart, ’81
Mohan Manohar, ’81
File a writ of error, Sarah.”
Go to court for a decree, Valorie.”
‘Try a writ of certiorari, Rosemary.”
In other words, put their backs to the
wall, Paul.
Letters to the Editor
New parking ‘solution’
Editor:
I would like to offer one final suggestion
as a solution to the “MSC Grass Question. ”
Self-admittedly, this is a tasteless
suggestion. But it could possibly offer relief
to another growing problem. How about
making the area around the MSC into park
ing space? I know ... tasteless.
—Mary Robinson, ’80
So I hope that if Eric Dickerson gets a
copy of Monday’s Battalion, he will realize
that there is one and only one person at
A&M unwilling to welcome him and be
blessed with his presence.
— Chris Lawless, ’82
Dear Mr. Stuart and Mr. Manohar:
Your letter addresses a problem that has long been recognized by the people who
work with registration for physical education activity courses. At present, even
though the procedure is somewhat cumbersome, we feel that in the long run, it
saves students more time and trouble than it causes them to spend.
According to Dr. Landiss, head of the Department of Health and Physical Educa
tion, the present procedure of registration is followed in order to reduce the
number of add and drop requests that would result if computer registration proce
dures were followed. As you know, when an add and drop request is made by a
student the use of the computer system frequently changes the student’s entire
schedule.
This fact, coupled with the extreme popularity of some activities, presents a
problem of major proportions in changing students’ schedules.
For example, in the scuba activity we have in excess of 300 more students who
wish to register for this activity than the facilities can accommodate. If all of these
students preregistered for this activity, it would mean that more than 300 students’
schedules would be rejected because the section had been filled and they would
then have to proceed through the drop and add process. This is just one activity out
of many; the same condition would be true for a number of other courses which
would produce an exceptionally large number of changes in students’ programs.
It is for these reasons primarily that the registration procedures in the Depart
ment of Health and Physical Education are done manually after students have
completed their basic class schedule. In this fashion the Department of Health and
Physical Education reduces significantly the number of changes that would have to
be made in the schedules in basic academic programs.
I can assure you that the faculty in the Department of Health and Physical
Education would be just as eager as you are to simplify the registration procedures
and to reduce the waiting in line. This procedure is constantly under review and,
upon completion of the new faeflities now under construction, we will re-evaluate
our registration process in an attempt to alleviate some of the problems.
—Jarvis E. Miller
President, Texas A&M
Fay no heed, Eric
Editor:
Two days before the SWC signing date, a
Texas A&M “supporter” speaks his mind in
the Battalion (Feb. 12) in an effort to get
attention and, in effect, hampers A&M’s
chances at signing perhaps the nation’s
most highly sought high school running
back. I’m referring to poorly-informed
Mike Carroll’s letter concerning the pre
decessor to Earl Campbell and Billy Sims
on the list of Heisman Trophy winners from
the great state of Texas.
Mr. Dickerson was open-minded
enough to carefully evaluate USC, Texas,
Texas Tech, Oklahoma, and A&M, and
made what he thought was the right deci
sion in choosing A&M. After visiting A&M
at his own expense, Dickerson decided that
the “friendly” atmosphere and the
academic program best fit his needs. Hope
fully he did not read Carroll’s letter, for if
we lose one of the best prospects in years
because of one letter, our “hellacious”
football team will have to find another way
to compete with Houston, Texas, SMU,
Baylor, and Tech.
As for the validity of Dickerson’s blue-
chip status, I think his credentials speak for
themselves.
Mosley, Dickey, Dickerson, and the
high-schooler from Texarkana would make
for a Ueetei-tiiaii-tieel offensive enreat.
Thotz
By Doug Graham
Bert... we Aggies are
Supposed -fo as rr>a*y
as possJLJe.,
Vou ca *-v
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as tonaioy services a:
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Top of the News
CAMPUS
Th
:01
By Rl'
Silver Taps will he held tonight
lUniversi
fen 282
Silver Taps is scheduled tonight for Pamela Jean Forest, a ^
freshman physical education major from Midland. She was
Saturday in an automobile accident in Bastrop. Funeral services®
set for this afternoon in Midland.
ice Sept
Ited fro n
the own
LOCAL
Area problems to he discussed
iryt
or j
By RE'
Community leaders and the staff of KAMU, Texas A&M Univer
sity’s public and educational broadcasting facility, will meet next
week to discuss issues and problems of significance to the peopled!
Bryan-College Station and the Brazos Valley. More than 400 commu
nity leaders have been invited by letter to attend any of four special
meetings planned for 7:30 p.m. next Monday through Feb. 22 in
Studio A of the Joe Hiram Moore Communications Center on the
campus. Anyone interested in attending the meetings should phone
the station for more information.
■School
Superintendent search continues
In a special session Monday night, A&M Consolidated School
Board trustees continued their search for a superintendent to replace
Fred Hopson, whose contract was terminated Nov. 20. Trustee
Bruce Robeck said the board “wouldn’t be at a decision point until we
have sufficient background.’ He indicated long-distance telephone
calls would be needed to supply this information and instructed board
members to keep a record of all expenses “to assess the cost of the
program. ” No further meetings of this screening committee are im
mediately planned. The board terminated Hopson’s contract citing
“disagreements concerning educational policy and policy implemen
tations.” His renegotiated contract will expire on June 30.
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STATE
Cuevas granted murder retrial
ceive i
te-guan
Rouse s;
rrect al
Jury selection in the capital murder retrial of Ignacio Cuevas, ac
cused in the 1974 slaying of a prison librarian, opened Monday
Cuevas, 46, was convicted and sentenced to death in April 1975, for
the murder of Julia Standley. Opposing lawyers agreed theconcepto!
“criminal responsibility would be important because evidence in the
inmates 1975 trial showed he did not fire the shot that killed the
hostage librarian. Evidence in the first trial showed Standley was
killed by bullets from inmate Rudolfo Dominguez’s gun, but the law
provided Cuevas could be held criminally responsible for participat
ing in the breakout effort. The Texas Court of Criminal Appeals ruled
District Judge Miron A. Love erred during jury selection at thefint
trial.
Gunman shot by Denton police
An unidentified gunman who abducted a female North Texas State
University officer and shot her twice in the leg as she tried to escape
was shot to death early Monday by Denton police. Two police vehi
cles attempted to set up a roadblock and the suspect wrecked his car
attempting to evade it. After the wreck, the suspect began shootingat
the officers and police returned the fire, killing the man. Authorities
said security officer Barabara Miller was treated and released from a
local hospital.
NATION
Funds for solar station needed
Has loci
'1 North
I2-8570
A top National Aeronautics and Space Administration official has
urged Congress to provide additional funding to continue studiesofa
proposed space orbital solar energy transmitting station. As pro
posed, the solar space station would involve a large Earth-orbiting
satellite that would collect the sun’s rays and then beam them to
Earth by microwave for conversion into electrical current. Commit
tee members also heard testimony that the nation’s $6.5 billion spare
shuttle program is almost on schedule and that landing of the first
orbital shuttle craft will be at NASA’s Northrup Strip on the southern
New Mexico missile range.
!f55(
Recruiting practices questioned
House Majority Leader Jim Wright has requested a House sub
committee investigation into Army recruiting practices in Fort Worth
and throughout the country. The recruiters said that in an effort to
meet enlistment quotas for the all-volunteer Army, some recruiters
have given answers to questions on service qualification tests. The)
also charged that some recruiters have asked prosecutors and judges
to drop or reduce charges against potential recruits so they can enlist.
>
WORLD
Queen to be treated like a man 10
Queen Elizabeth and Prince Phillip left a snowy London Monday,
aboard a special Concorde flight for Kuwait, the first stop on their
18-day tour of Arab oil states on the Persian Gulf. After Kuwait, the
royal couple will fly to Bahrain where the queen plans to look at some
of the finest Arab race horses in the Middle East. From there, the
queen will fly east to Riyadh where she will be the first British
monarch and the first woman sovereign to visit the Islamic Saudi
kingdom. The Saudis, who do not believe in the equality of women,
are expected to circumvent tradition by treating the queen and her
four ladies-in-waiting as “honorary men.”
The Battalion
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[
O
c
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