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The Battalion Wednesday
Texas A&M University January 4, 1978
Charming comics, competing comedians
When Charlie Chaplin died Christmas Day, an era
died with him. He and Groucho Marx, who died last
summer, were the last of their species, the film comic.
Oh, I know, I know. There’s still Woody Allen. But
somehow it’s not the same. The great film comics like
Chaplin, Marx, W. C. Fields and Harold Lloyd have
gone the way of dinosaurs and Edsels.
As my little brother used to say, they’ve gone bye-
bye. So be it.
Their films seem doomed to wander the Late Show
circuit. But their films are classics, if only because they
brought sanity to a time filled with insanity. And they
did it with chaos.
Groucho was the fire-breathing scoundrel whose spir
ited monologues started anywhere, got nowhere and
were damn proud of it. “Pick a card, any card. You can
keep it. I’ve got fifty-one more.”
Chaplin, on the other hand, was a silent imp. Other
than background music, and some sound effects, his
movies were without sound. Anything he had to say
could be gathered with a wink, a frown, or that silly,
shuffling walk that became his trademark.
He was the Little Tramp upon whom the world
heaved its wrath. Yet he weathered all with a combina
tion of remarkable preserverance and hilarious incom
petence.
Groucho was East. Chaplin was West. And ne’er the
twain shall meet. For off-screen, their personalities
mixed like hot grease and cold water.
Professional jealousy ran amok between the two. Take
their tennis match at the 1933 opening of the Beverly
Hills Tennis Club for instance.
Chaplin showed up with one racket and a keen sense
of competiveness. Groucho brought twelve rackets, one
suitcase and a keen sense of what would make Chaplin
blow his stack.
When Chaplin asked what in God’s name was in the
suitcase, Groucho replied that tennis players proficient
enough to carry a suitcase were rarely foolish enough to
divulge its contents.
But after two rounds of solumn tennis, Groucho de
cided enough was enough. He opened the suitcase,
pulled forth a picnic lunch and proceeded to spread it
about the playing area, even sharing a sandwich or two
with spectators.
Chaplin was incredulous. “I didn’t come here to be
your straight man,” he screamed.
That’s what he thought.
In everything, Groucho was the free spirit and Chap
lin was the workaholic. Maybe that’s why we know
Groucho by his first name and Chaplin by his last.
David S. Broder
Congressional ‘lions’ taming Carter
WASHINGTON—Much has been said,
most of it critical, about President Carter’s
handling of Congress. Less has been
said—and more is justified—about Con
gress’ handling of the President.
The en d-of-th e-session assessments
proceed on the assumption that in the cir
cus that is Washington, Congress is the
lion act. The President’s job, as the lion-
tamer, is to turn those brawling “cats” into
a disciplined troupe of performers. This
year, that analogy is doubly in error.
It is in error, first, because these “cats”
in Congress have become increasingly
immume to whip-cracking. If they heed
anyone, it is not the President (who trailed
them at the polls on election day), but
their own leaders.
Second, the tricks that had to be learned
for (he show to be a success were not
things Carter could teach Congress, but
Congress could teach Carter. The mem
bers of Congress collectively had
thousands more years of working experi
ence in the federal government than did
the President.
Of all the congressional leaders. House
Speaker Thomas P. “Tip” O’Neill, D-
Mass., came closest to realizing that the
burdens of both discipline and tutelage
were his, not Carter’s, and he proceeded
accordingly.
There were some lapses of leadership
even on O’Neill’s part, particularly when it
comes to issues of accute personal and
political sensitivity like abortion and
election-law revision.
But, for the most part, O’Neill
functioned well both as tutor to the Presi
dent and disciplinarian for the House “L-
ions.” The record of legislative accom
plishment in the House made both the
House and the President look good.
The same cannot be said for the prideful
Senate. Sen. Robert C. Byrd, D-W. Va.,
chosen as majority leader not by Jimmy
Carter but by the Senate Democrats,
earned a reputation at the White HJouse
for remarkable constancy. Unfortunately,
it was not constancy of support, of advo
cacy, or even of conciliation for which he
was noted. Rather, the White Hoiuse
came to expect from Byrd a one-note
warning of dire catastrophe lurking around
the legislative bend.
But the blame does not rest on Byrd’s
shouldears alone. The Senate speaks with
many voices. Some of them, sad to say,
were tinged with bitternesas that Carter,
and not one of them, was in the White
House in 1977.
Neither by word nor by deed did the
Senate lions give the President the cues he
needed to have a successful administra
tion.
At the very outset, they indulged their
personal pique by rejecting the nomina
tion of Ted Sorensen for CIA director and
very nearly sabotaging the choice of Paul
Warnke for arms-control negotiator.
While doing this, they smilingly
encouraged Carter’s penchant for
cronyism by approving the choice of Grif
fin Bell and Pete Flaherty to head the Jus
tice Department and Bert Lance as budget
director.
The message that this is a double
standard government was under-lined
when senators reacted like Tammany Hall
aldermen when Carter threatened to cut
off some of their favorite dam projects, but
cheered like school-boys the naive
rhetoric of his early “human rights”
crusade.
The lesson these actions conveyed was
that the Senate would ignore or indulge
misjudgments of great magnitude by the
novice President, but fight him on every
thing petty and parochial.
It was the Senate which forced Carter’s
first fateful policy flip-flop: the abandon
ment of the tax-rebate portion of the eco
nomic stimulus package—a step which
looks more dubious with each passing
month of frozen unemployment statistics.
It was the Senate which screamed—and
not without justification—at the adminis-
traton’s failure to consult its “experts” in
framing the energy program.
And it was the Senate which demon
strated, over the last eight months, that it
lacked the will, the skill or the “expertise”
to compose its own differences on the
energy issues. Neither in committee, nor
on the Senate floor, nor in the conference
with the House was the Senate ever able
to face up to the hard choices that must be
made to achieve a national energy policy.
If Carter is faulted deservedly for the
internal contradictions of his own energy
proposal, how much greater fault does the
Senate bear for being unable, at any point,
to resolve those contradictions into any
kind of serious counterproposal?
Carter and his aides bear full responsi
bility for the many errors of judgement
and tactics they made in dealing with
Congress. But they were acknowledged
novices. The Senate has no such excuse.
(c) 1977, The Washington Post Com
pany
Dick West
A mountain by any other name...
By DICK WEST
United Press International
WASHINGTON-Among the prices we
pay for longevity is a high degree of vul
nerability to attacks of deja vu, the feeling
of having been there before.
I had such a seizure the other day when
the U.S. Board on Geographic Names an
nounced it was postponing action on re
quests to change the name of Mt. McKinley
back to its original Indian name, Denali.
The requests came from Alaska, where
the Indians are located. The opposition
came mainly from Ohio, President McKin
ley’s home state.
The board has put the matter aside until
Congress disposes of a pending resolution
to keep the present name.
In 1931, which is where the deja vu
comes in, a huge dam on the Colorado
River was named for President Hoover,
during whose term the project was au
thorized.
But after Hoover left office in 1933, the
Interior Department began calling it Boul
der Dam.
In 1948, Congress approved legislation
renaming it Hoover Dam, and there it
stands today. In the interim, however,
there have been attempts to name it Boul
der Dam again.
It was, I believe, newscaster David
Brinkley who suggested a reasonable way
to end the dispute - why not ask Hoover to
change his name to Herbert Boulder?
Nothing ever came of the proposal and
no solution that simple can even be consid
ered with respect to Mt. McKinley.
Our 25th president has been long since
dead and there are no provisions for post
humously changing his name to William
Denali. But perhaps a trade-off could be
arranged.
One possibility would be to remove
McKinley’s name from the Alaskan peak
and rename the highest peak in Ohio in his
honor.
But since Campbell Hill, the highest
peak in Ohio, is only 1,550 feet above sea
Letters to the editor
level, that compromise might not be ac
ceptable to McKinley’s admirers. So
another suitable landmark must be found.
Mt. Everest, for instance.
Whereas Mt. McKinley is merely the
highest summit in North America, Mt.
Everest is the tallest on earth. The step-up
in elevation should make the switch palata
ble to the McKinley lobby.
More important, Mt. Everest is located
in Nepal, which is a long way off. If the
Nepalese object to changing its name to
Mt. McKinley, who cares?
I say we in the United States are entitled
to call Mt. Everest anything we want to.
For that matter, the Nepalese themselves
have another name for it. They call it
Sagarmatha.
Failing that, there is one other possible
compromise. Change the name of Mt.
McKinley to Mt. Hoover; change the name
of Campbell Hill to Boulder Hill; change
the name of Hoover Dam to Denali Dam,
and build a new dam on the Ohio River,
naming it after McKinley.
Teague bids constituents farewell
Editor’s note: Congressman Olin E.
“Tiger” Teague of Texas’ 6th Congres
sional District, has announced he will not
seek re-election after completing his cur
rent term in the House. The following is
an open letter from Teague to his con
stituents in the 6th District.
People of the 6th District:
This year I not only want to wish you a
wonderful Christmas and New Year, I also
want to share my plans with you.
I have been your congressman for 31
years. I cannot conceive of a more reward
ing career than that of serving as represen
tative of you, the people of the 6th District
of Texas. You have been wonderful to me
and my family and I hope I have deserved
the kindness, understanding and support
you have given me over the years.
I have given the job of representing you
all the energy and ability at my command.
However, my health is such that' I do not
befieve I can continue to serve you beyond
my present term with the same energy
and effort of previous years. I am making
this announcement now so that all those
who aspire to be your representative will
have ample time to prepare their cam
paigns and you will have ample time to
make your decision.
I hope my successor, whoever he or she
might be, will inspire the same land of
affectionate cooperation you have give me.
The people of the 6th District deserve
only the best and this is my wish for you.
God bless you all.
Olin E. Teague
Congressman
6th District of Texas
Inmate wants penpals
Editor:
Perhaps my request is unusual but I am.
a lonely 28-year-old brother who is incar-,
Jcerated in the Florida penal system.
My request is could you please publish
this letter in your editorial section so that
the beautiful brothers and sisters of your
college that would like could correspond
with me, should they desire to do so?
I am free and liberal minded in my pat
terns of thought, even though I confess to
, having made an error with choosing the
I path of my life. I still have creative ideas
and would love to share my feelings with
any interested parties.
I thank you for your time and concern!
James D. Phillips, 051896, P.O.
Box 221, Raiford, Florida, 32083
Writing the
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Top of the News
State
Police searching for two abductors
Police are searching for two men who abducted and stabbed nurs
ing assistant Richard Carrera, 22, in a ransom demand from Luthera
Hospital. Carrera was listed in stable condition Tuesday at the hospi
tal after being found in Northwest Bexar County Monday. A man
telephoned the hospital demanding $1,000 ransom for Carrera and
alleged that the hospital “killed my father three months ago and I’m
going to get even.” Several threatening telephone calls from two men
were received during the extortion attempt and police said the ab
ductors never made arrangements for payment of the ransom.
DeBakey recovering from burns
Heart surgeon Michael E. DeBakey remained hospitalized in good
condition Tuesday recovering from smoke inhalation and superficial
bums suffered during a New Year’s Eve fire at his home. Hospital
officials said DeBakey would be able to go home in a few days. He
was taken to Methodist Hospital about 10 p.m. Saturday following a
house fire, attributed to fireplace sparks igniting a rug which in turn
ignited a Christmas tree. No one else was injured.
State rests case in Hughes’ trial
Assistant Attorney General Rich Harrison, hoping to prove for
inheritance tax purposes that the late Howard Hughes was a Texas
resident, rested the states’ case Tuesday. Harrison told Probate
Judge Pat Gregory early in the afternoon the state had concluded its
case with the presentation of final documents linking the reclusive
tycoon to Texas. Frank Davis, attorney for Hughes’ survivors who
dispute Texas’ claim, began his case shortly after Harrison finished.
Davis wants to prove Nevada to be Hughes’ residence, but only
must prove that Texas was not to win his case.
State officials sworn in Tuesday
Four new Criminal Appeals Court judges and one Railroad Com
mission member took office Tuesday and officials said the occasion
signaled a new day for one of the state’s most influential regulatory
agencies and a chance to accelerate the process of criminal justice.
John Poemer, 44, was sworn in as the newest member of the Railroad
Commission. The new judges are Carl E.F. Dally of Houston, Tom
G. Davis of Vernon, Jim Vollers of Beaumont and W.C. Davis of
Bryan. Briscoe participated in both swearing-in ceremonies.
Nation
Hurricane hearing defies court
A congressional hearing on the status of a hurricane protection
project for Lake Ponchartrain will be held Thursday in New Orleans
despite a federal court order temporarily halting the project. Chair
man Harold T. Johnson, D-Calif., said information gathered "t *’k“
hearing will be useful to the Army Corps of Engineers in its re'
the project and in further work on an environmental impact
ment. Last Friday, a federal court in New Orleans issued an i
tion restraining the Corps of Engineers from proceeding wi
project pending completion of the environmental statement.
Bone picked on meat label
Negotiations reportedly are underway between the meat industry
and a consumer organization to find an agreeable name for a food
product containing ground bone. Agriculture Department sources
report a compromise reached by the industry and the Consumer
federation of America could modify the government's proposal that
the product be called Tissue from Ground Bone. The American Meat
Institute says a food product containing “tissue from ground bone” on
its label wouldn’t sell. It likes the name Mechanically Deboned Meat
— or better yet — Beef Food Product.
Labor leaders denied appeal
Two Lake Charles, La., labor leaders, convicted of extorting
$5,000 from a businessman to ensure peaceful labor relations, Tues
day lost their appeal. The 5th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals upheld
the Oct. 8, 1976, convictions of Donald Lovett and Harlan Duhon on
federal extortion statutes. The appeals court said the trial, conducted
by Distrct Judge Nauman Scott of Alexandria in Monroe on a change
of venue request, was fair.
World
Freak storms hit Britain
Freak storms buffeted Britain Tuesday, blowing roofs off buildings
and causing chaos on the roads. A whirlwind ripped through New
market, in Suffolk, severely damaging more than 100 houses. Au
thorities said several elderly people were being treated for shock.
Savage gales hit other parts of England.
Weather
Mostly cloudy today, tomorrow and Thursday with east to
southeasterly winds at 10-15 mph. High today upper 60’s.
Low tonight upper 40’s. High on Thursday near 70. Chance of
rain by Saturday & Sunday.
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