Page 12 THE BATTALION
WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 7, 1977
focus
Bloodshot eyes, glassy stare, you re incoherent hut you know it's here,,
Dead
NO-SLEEP] Hiii
Cjrra
By GLENNA WHITLEY
Survival. That’s the name of the game during finals.
Forget those esoteric ideas about acing your Eco
nomies 319 final. Think about staying alive through five
torturous days of deprivation (of sleep), degradation (as
you beg for Dave’s notes), and desperation (when you
realize the book you haven’t opened all semester is the
wrong one).
Survival Tip No. 1 — Don’t drink the water. Really.
Drink caffeine. It comes in pleasant flavors; coffee, tea,
coke. Stay away from beer and other tasty alcoholic
beverages. Not because they’re not good for you, but
the study light in the Dixie Chicken is a little dim.
Survival Tip No. 2 — Organize your notes. When
you realize you haven’t got the notes from September,
October, and half of November, and the test is com
prehensive, find someone else’s notes and organize
them.
Survival Tip No. 3 — Exercise. Jog, play racquet-
ball, dodge people wandering around the library
glassy-eyed, throw darts at pictures of Battalion
sportswriters. Stop studying for a while, though. Work
out your body, not your brain.
Survival Tip No. 4 — Eat. Forget what your mama
said about green beans, liver, fresh fruit and milk. Junk
food is the only thing that helps the sco-pro-and-fading
blues. Doughnuts, tacos. Big Macs, pretzels, pizza,
french fries, burritos, potato chips, cream cheese and
tabasco dip, popcorn, Nestle’s crunch bars and onion
(See DEAD, page 13)
□
By RUSTY CAWLEY
Monday:
So this is dead week. I should have been dead weeks
ago. Thank God my profs are giving me a light load. I
mean, all I have to do is study for seven finals, com
plete five lab practicals, read Beowulf and explain to
my editor why I’m not writing.
Lots of laughs.
Tuesday:
No sleep last night. Maybe it’s the 12 tablets of
No-Doz in my bloodstream. My roommate spent the
wee hours riding around the apartment on his
skateboard. “Banzai!” he screamed, diving into Scruf
fy’s litter box.
I spent the night with “The Development of Cricket
Gentilia During the Mesoplaphonic Era.” Just before
dawn, we snuck around the parking lot, stuffing
potatoes in the exhaust pipes of our neighbors’ cars.
Chicken noodle soup and Cheerios for breakfast.
Wednesday:
An evening at the library. Term paper due tomor-
row. Will title it “Daniel Boone, Bella Abzug and the
Oedipus Complex. If God had been a college student,
he would have rested for six days and pulled an all-
nighter. Dead week exhaustion is as certain for an
Aggie as death and taxes. And George Woodard on
third and short.
Thursday:
Seventy-two hours without sleep. Myroomisl
with green gnomes threatening to force-fee^
shredded wheat. I hid under the bed until myi
mate assured me they weren’t there. “Comeonn
he screamed. “There aren’t any gnomes out here)
three giant red bunnies who want to challenge you ij
game of handball. ”
What can I say? I better not say anything or lb
put me away.
Ventured out of the house long enough to turuii
English paper. I changed the title to “Gone'
Wind and its Effects on the Carter Administrali
My prof took one look at it and said, “This is fine
couldn’t you have typed it on something otherl
Disneyland stationery?”
Despair.
Friday:
The week is over. I wore my old penny 1
cause I didn’t have the energy to tie my shoelaces
roommate is in the backyard shooting chinaben
our tree with his .38. He claims to be the reals
Sam. I don’t argue, though I should. Maybe hew
put me out of my misery.
Aggieland
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