John Platzer
Cover Those Legs, Girls;
The Sound Is Deafening
Have you noticed how the
sound level seems to automati
cally increase -each time certain
young ladies enter the scene ?
Dr. Vern 0. Knudsen, a physi
cist and one-time chancellor of
UCLA, has come up with an
answer for this phenomena other
than the obvious one.
“Clothing absorbs sound, and
a girl in a miniskirt reflects a
lot more soundwaves than one
who is dressed conventionally,”
the pioneering doctor explains in
an Associated Press story.
Testing his theory scientifi
cally, Dr. Knudsen has 10 mini-
skirted girls gather in a rever
beration chamber where a .22 cal
iber pistol was fired. Later ten
persons in conventional clothing
were gathered in the chamber
and the same gun was fired.
A machine which measures
such things showed that the per
sons in conventional attire had
absorbed almost twice as much
sound as the miniskirted girls.
Once this critical information
reaches the American public, a
whole new industry will be born.
Yes, “Sound Shawls” will be the
next “in” thing on the fashion
scene:
(Late Bloomer cautiously ap
proaches her favorite fellow.
Easy Doesit, from behind hoping
to surprise him.)
“Hi, Late. What are you up
to today?” East says without
turning around.
“Oh, Easy I wanted to sur
prise you. How did you know it
was me?”
“I heard those S 1 /^ inches
coming and I knew it had to be
you in your yellow miniskirt. I
thought for a minute you were
wearing your blue one today but
it is 8>4 inches above your
knees.”
“Easy, you have such beauti
fully sensitive ears,” Late sighed
breathlessly.
“Look what I have for you. It’s
the latest thing,” Easy says un-
wraping a blue knit cape.
“It’s uh . . . fantastic. What
does it do?”
“Why it’s a Sound Shawl, Late,
it will be great for this week
end but I will have to teach you
how to use . . .”
(About that time Easy’s ears
perk up and his attention lapses
as a beautiful blonde in a mini
skirt a good nine inches above
the knee slithers by).
“Easy!” Late pouts, “you know
I don’t like for you to listen at
other girls.”
“I’m sorry but that girl had
remarkable sound vibrations.”
“Okay, but tell me about the
shawl.”
“At the football game tomor
row all the girls will drape them
over their legs once they are in
the stadium and seated,” Easy
explains.
“There will be ‘Shawl Leaders’
on the field and whenever an in
crease in noise is needed they
will give the signal. On cue the
girls will sling the shawls over
their shoulders and the stadium
will rock with the sound.”
“Won’t the sudden breeze af
fect the playing on the field?”
Late asks with a knowing grin.
“What breeze is that?”
“That caused by all the guys
swiftly turning their heads all at
once.”
(Ignoring Late’s apparent lack
of taste on such an important
topic, Easy continues his de
scription of the coming week
end).
“Following the game we are
going to a classical concert and
you will have to keep the shawl
around your knees the whole
time there.”
“Why?”
“We were a rock and
roll show no one would notice
the noise from your legs but this
is a symphony and we don’t want
to distract from the musicians.”
“I could get a copy of the
music ahead of time and play
along with them by covering and
uncovering my legs in time with
the music,” Late suggests.
(As Easy and Late disappear
into the sunset, it appears obvi
ous that a “Sound Shawl” will be
an essential part of every young
girls’ wardrobe for years to
come. All thanks to Dr. Knud
sen and his incredible discovery.)
j Listen Up the halt forum
Editor:
Here is a logical problem I
recently encountered and believe
your readers might enjoy trying
to solve. If any can, I would
appreciate knowing the answer
because I have worked on it sev
eral days without finding a
solution:
Once upon a time there was a
university which allowed a politi
cal club to sponsor an apprecia
tion dinner for a state senator on
its research annex campus and
allowed members of its staff to
sell and distribute tickets for this
dinner. This same university’s
regulations prohibited the forma
tion of partisan political groups
on campus by its students and
did not allow such groups even
if formed off campus to use the
facilities of the university.
This same university’s regula
tions prohibited its faculty and
staff from using any university
controlled property in any way
TONIGHT
American Association of Uni
versity Professors will have its
first meeting at 7:30 p.m. in
Room 226 of the university li
brary.
Houston Hometown Club will
discuss Rice party tickets at 7:30
p.m. in Room 231 of the Physics
building.
TAMU Wrestling Team will
meet at 4:30 p.m. daily in Room
256 in G. Rollie White Coliseum.
for political meetings or cam
paign purposes.
Select one or more statements
below that explain why this uni
versity was not inconsistent. All
of the statements above are true
and the statements you select
must also be true:
1. The group sponsoring the
dinner, although composed of the
senator’s supporters, was not in
any way a political group.
2. The university’s research
annex campus was not controlled
by the university.
3. The faculty and staff who
distributed the tickets and col
lected money for them were not
university employees.
4. No student group seeking
approval to meet on campus was
ever refused such approval be
cause it was, or was believed to
be, a political group.
5. Off campus political groups
composed of students were al
ways welcome to use the univer-
Anyone may join by calling An-
drek Beck at 5-4586.
Hillel Club will meet at 7:30
p.m. in the Hillel House.
Aggie Christian Fellowship will
hear Steve Atkinson discuss “His
tory and Christianity” at 5:30
p.m. in the MSC Art Room.
THURSDAY
Texarkana Area Hometown
Club will meet at 7:30 p.m. in the
lounge between dormitories 6 and
8.
sity facilities for political meet
ings and campaigning purposes.
6. University regulations pre
venting students and employees
from using university property
for political purposes had been
repealed and were no longer in
force.
Manuel M. Davenport
Head
Department of Philosophy
★ ★ ★
Editor:
I am not a student at A&M
nor am I a student wife but I
am a faithful reader of this pa
per and your column. I cannot
pass up this opportunity to con
gratulate the Fightin’ Texas Ag
gie Band on a great halftime
performance at the A&M-Baylor
game. It was really impressive
to see almost 300 cadets, all in
step, with straight lines and di
agonals spread across the field.
To have an organization this fine
represent your school is a great
honor and must impress any
body who sees them perform.
I’m sure a great many other
people feel as I do and are proud
to call this organization “Their
Band.” Also, I’m sure there is
no doubt in anyone’s mind that
whether or not the Aggies win
their games on the scoreboard,
the Aggie Band always wins the
halftimes.
Again, congratulations on a
fine halftime performance.
Mrs. Jim Thibodeaux
College Station
Bulletin Board
Cbe Battalion
Opinions expressed in The Battalion are those of
the student writers only. The Battalion is a non-tax-
supported, non-profit, self-supporting educational enter
prise edited and operated by students as a university and
community newspaper.
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l.ellers to the editor should be typed, double-spaced,
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must be signed, although the writer’s name will be with
held by arrangement with the editor. Address corre
spondence to Listen Up, The Battalion, Room 217,
Services Building, College Station, Texas 77843.
1969 TPA Award Winner
Members of the Student Publications Board are: Jim
Lindsey, chairman ; H. F. Filers, College of Liberal Arts ;
F. S. White, College of Engineering; Dr. Asa B. Childers, Ja.
College of Veterinary Medicine; and Dr. Z. L. Cai*penter,
College of Agriculture.
The Battalion, a student newspaper at Texas A&M is
published in College Station, Texas daily except Saturday,
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EDITOR DAVE MAYES
Managing Editor David Middlebrooke
Sports Editor Richard Campbell
Assistant Sports Editor Mike Wright
Staff Writers Tom Curl, Janie Wallace, Jay F.
Goode, Pam Troboy, Steve For
man, Gary Mayfield, Payne-
Harrison, Raul Pineda, Hayden
Whitsett, Clifford Broyles, Pat
Little, Tim Searson, Bob
Robiri|Son
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Platzer, Gary McDonald
Photographers Steve Bryant, Bob Stump
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CADET SLOUCH
by Jim Earle
Page 2
THE BATTALION
College Station, Texas Wednesday, October 29, is|
residence hall beat
By Raleigh Lane
Special to The Battalion
The Residence Hall Committee
of the Civilian Student Council
met recently for the first time.
This is a new committee of the
CSC composed of the vice-presi
dents of the residence halls.
Chairing the committee will be
First Vice President of the CSC,
David Alexander.
Concern with residence halls is
the purpose of the committee and
they set three guidelines which
are as follows: (1) Gain coordi
nation between residence halls;
(2) discuss problems and activi
ties in residence halls and (3)
make suggestions to the CSC.
During the first meeting an
expression of discontent with the
phone service was made and a
committee was appointed to meet
with officials of General Tele
phone. The meeting was held
and the phone company said they
were working to alleviate the
problems.
Law Hall will host four boys
from the Methodist Home in Wa
co during the SMU-A&M foot
ball weekend. Phil Sadler,!
Hall president, said, “these kl
are going to live in our halls|
be Aggies for the weekend,”if
boys, of age 12-16, will art I
on campus Saturday momi|
and leave Sunday afternoon.
Coeds came to Walton ij
during the Baylor-A&M nel
end. The residents of H
ramps moved out for the wJ
end to allow the dates of Walt
Hall residents a place to star
“My last three years in the band have been utter misery!
I live in continual fear that they’ll discover that I can’t
play an instrument!”
(Cole -Maatiiu
*
“7
SHOES
Jon Stmntl
unibrrsitt’ nun’s ton
i
32® University Drive 713 MM
Col lege Station. Text* 7*W
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X
PEANUTS
INfSTEAD, I'M G0IN6 TO WRITE A
LETTER TO THE HEAP BEAGLE...
HOD POES THAT STRIKE TOO ?
By Charles M. Schuli ^
-•‘Ur.