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Battalion Editorials
Page 2
WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 5, 1955
March of Dimes
The 1955 Brazos County March of Dimes drive which
opened Tuesday with a goal of $20,000 should get a lot of
local support.
Five children were dropped out of Consolidated this fall
with a diagnosis of polio and although parents were generally
calm about the situation, there were doubtless days of ner
vous tension and anxiety.
About 500 local elementary school children were given
gamma globulin polio immunization shots during a two day
period in October. These shots were paid for with March of
Dimes funds.
When you see one of those plastic coin jars in local bus
iness establishments, drop in some of your pocket change.
You certainly won’t miss the money and the March of Dimes
people will put it to the best possible use—to protect children
against polio.
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Diplomat To Address
Great Issues Group
Sir Robert Scott, the second
hig-hest diplomat in the British em
bassy in Washington, will speak
for the Great Issues series Jan. 13.
He will talk on “The British Ap
proach to Asian Problems,” in the
Memorial Student Center ballroom
at 1:30 p.m.
Sir Robert served in Japan, Chi
na and Hong Kong before he was
made a prisoner of war. In 1949,
he was named head of the foreign
office’s Southeast Asia department
and was superintendent of the Far
Eastern department.
He took the Washington post as
minister at the British embassy in
July, 1953.
Watts Promoted
Richard G. Watts, ’32, has been
named chief civil engineer of the
Magnolia Petroleum company ac
cording to an announcement made
Dec. 30 by A. E. Chester, vice-
president and manager of produc
tion for the Oallas organization.
Dr. Hamorszky
A&M Graduate
Is Artist Also
SAVE
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18x36 HEMMED SACKS
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5 YARDS
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WASH CLOTHS
14c ea.
One A&M graduate, who is now
practicing veterinarian in Wa?o,
has his own special way of seeing
that some members of the School
of Veterinary Medicine are remem
bered.
The man, Dr. K. R. Hamorszky,
A&M D.V.M. graduate of 1940, is
the artist who painted seven pic
tures and gave them to the veter
inary school in 1952 and 1953.
The pictures are of F. P. Jaggi,
A. A. Lenert, Hubert Schmidt, P.
W. Burns, Richard D. Turk, and I.
B. Boughton, all veterinary doc
tors who have been associated with
the School of Veterinary Medicine
here. Another picture painted by
Hamorszky was of “Doctor” Tom
Brown, chief kennelman of the vet
erinary hospital.
Harmonszky, in a letter to Col
lege Archivist D. B. Gofer, gave
the following reason for donating
the paintings to the veterinary
school:
“The idea of donating the paint
ings to the school, instead of to
the individuals was the simple and
well known fact of life that we all
have to die some day and I wanted
those men—who deserve to be re
membered—be more to future stu
dents than just hearsay evidence.”
Harmonszky has had a colorful
life, including fighting in two
world wars. During World War I
he was an officer in the Royal
Hungarian army. In the second
World! War he served in the U. S
afmy from Oct., 1942, to March
1945 in the Texas 3Gth division.
He was wounded at Veletri, Italy,
between Anzio and Rome.
As to why he served as a buck
private and not as an officer in
the veterinary corps, Harmonszky
wrote in another letter to Gofer:
joined the army because I wanted
to fight a war and not pass the
time inspecting ice cream, candl
ing eggs, sniffing at sausages, and
determining the ph of canned oys
ters.
“As a buck private I got a belly
ful of fighting—and I had a won
derful time—while it lasted.”
Job Calls
• Jan. 10—Union Electric Co. of
Missouri will be interested in elec
trical and mechanical engineers
for their engineer development
program, which is a rotated work
assignment program of 13 months,
all in the St. Louis area and cov
ering major fields of engineering
work.
© Jan. 10 — There will be a
group meeting in room 3D of the
Memorial Student Center at 5 p.m.
for the Tennessee Coal & Iron
(Division of U. S. Steel). They
are interested in mechanical, elec
trical, and industrial engineers, for
openings as practice engineers.
Physics Students
To Get Handbooks
Six copies of the professional
“Handbook of Chemistry, and Phy
sics” will be awarded to outstand
ing students in sophomore phy
sics by the Chemical Publishing
company of Cleveland, Ohio, ac
cording to J. G. Potter, head of
the physics department.
The handbook will be presented
at the end of the present academic
year to students of various Cur T
riculums chosen by a committee of
the physics faculty.
What’s Cooking
WEDNESDAY
7:00—Aggie Explorer Scouts and
Scouters, YMCA, short organiza
tional meeting.
Wisconsin’s state parks and for
ests wei’e visited by five million
people last year.
On Campos
Mth
MaxQhuiman
(Author of "Barefoot Boy With Cheek" etc.)
TODAY
Released Thru UNITED ARTISTS
THURSDAY & FRIDAY
WARNER BROS.
Written by OTTO ENGLANDER Produced by FRANK MELFORD
Directed by JOHN BRAHM
A MFISON Production Distributed by WARNER BROS.
The Battalion
The Editorial Policy of The Battalion
Represents the Views of the Student Editors
The Battalion, newspaper of the Agricultural and Mechanical
( College of Texas and the City of College Station, Is published by stu
dents four times a week dui'ing the regular school year. During the
summer terms The Battalion is published twice a week, and during
examination and vacation periods, once a week. Days of publication
are Tuesday through Friday for the regular school year, Tuesday and
Thursday during the summer terms, and Thursday during examination
and vacation periods. The Battalion is not published on the Wednesday
immediately preceding Easter or Thanksgiving. Subscription rates
are $3.50 per semester, $6.00 per school year, $7.00 per full year, or
$1.00 per month. Advertising rates furnished on request.
Entered as second-class
matter at Post Office at
College Station, Texas
under the Act of Con
gress of March 3, 1870.
Member of
The Associated Press
Represented nationally by
National Advertising
Services, Inc., at New
York City, Chicago, Los
Angeles, and San Fran
cisco. •
Foreign Studen ts
Attend Stock Show
The Houston Fat Stock show has
invited 45 foreign students from
A&M to attend the show, according
to Bennie A. Zinn, Head of student
affairs.
The students will attend the
stock and poultry show Saturday
morning, Feb. 12 and the rodeo
that afternoon.
After the rodeo the students will
be the guests of Houston families.
Requests
The Associated Press is entitled exclusively to the use for republi
cation of all news dispatches credited to it or not otherwise credited in
the paper and local news of spontaneous origin published herein. Rights
of republication of all other matter herein are also reserved.
News contributions may be made by telephone (4-5444 or 4-7604) or
at the editorial office room, 202 Goodwin Hall. Classified ads may be
placed by telephone (4-5324) or at the Student Publication Office,
Room 207 Goodwin Hall.
BOB BORISKIE, HARRI BAKER Co-Editors
Jon Kinslow... , Managing Editor
Jerry Wizig Sports Editor
Don Shepard, Bill Fullerton News Editors
Ralph Cole , City Editor
Ronnie Greathouse Sports Writer
Jim Neighbors, Welton Jones, Paul Savage Reporters
Mrs. Jo Ann Cocanougher Women’s Editor
Miss Betsy Burchard ..A&M Consolidated Correspondent
Maurice Olian A&M Consolidated Sports Correspondent
Larry Lightfoot Circulation Manager
(Continued from Page 1)
Colleges and Universities, of which
A&M is also a member, will also
make recommendations on ROTC
and the defense program to Con
gress sometime this year.
“It seems probable that no legis
lation considered by the first ses
sion of the 84th Congress will be
of more importance to higher edu
cation than this National Reserve
Plan,” said Arthur S. Adams, pres
ident of the ACE, in a letter to all
member colleges.
FILM SOCIETY
MISTER 880 January 7—7:30
JIM THORPE, ALL
AMERICAN January 9—2:00
THE PRINCE OF FOXES .. January 11—7:30
RHAPSODY IN BLUE .... January 14—7:30
OF MICE AND MEN .... January 21—7:30
® The film on January 4 “Pinky” has been rescheduled.
• This schedule is for January, only . . . The second
semester films are to be announced at a later date.
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SCIENCE MADE SIMPLE: No. 1
In this day and age, as I like to call it, everybody should know
something about science. Unfortunately, however, the great majority
of us are majoring in elocution, and we do not get a chance to take
any science. But we can at least learn the fundamentals.
Though this cqlumn is intended to be a source of innocent merri
ment for all sexes and not to concern itself with weighty matters,
I have asked the makers of Philip Morris whether I might not from
time to time use this space for a short lesson in science. “Makers,”
I said to them, “might I not from time to time use this space for a
short lesson in science?”
“Bless you, lad!” cried the makers, chuckling. “You may cer
tainly use this space from time to time for a short lesson in science.”
They are very benign men, the makers, fond of children, small
animals, community singing, and simple country food. Their benevo
lence is due in no small measure to the cigarettes they smoke, for
Philip Morris is a cigarette to soothe the most savage of breasts. I
refer not only to the quality of the tobacco — which, as everyone
knows, is amiable, humane, and gracious — but also to the quality
of the package. Here is no fiendishly contrived container to fray the
fingernails and rasp the nerves. Here, instead, is the most simple
of devices: you pull a tab, a snap is heard, and there, ready at hand,
are your Philip Morris Cigarettes. Strike a match, take a puff, and
heave a delicious little rippling sigh of pure content.
So, with the cordial concurrence of the makers, I will from time to
time devote this column to a brief lesson in science.
Let us start today with chemistry. It is fitting that chemistry
should be the first of our series, for chemistry is the oldest of sciences,
having been discovered by Ben Franklin in 123 B.C. when an apple
fell on his head while he was shooting the breeze with Pythagoras
one day outside the Acropolis. (The reason they were outside the
Acropolis and not inside was that Pythagoras had been thrown out
for drawing right triangles all over the walls. They had several
meetings outside the Acropolis, but finally Franklin said, “Look,
Pythagoras, this is nothing against you, see, but I’m no kid any more
and if I keep laying around on this wet grass with you, I’m liable
to get the break-bone fever. I’m going inside.” Pythagoras, friendless
now, moped around Athens for a while, then drifted off to Brussels
where he married a girl named Harriet Sigafoos and went into the
linseed oil game. He would also certainly be forgotten today had
not Shakespeare written “Othello.”)
But I digress. We were beginning a discussion of chemistry, and
the best way to begin is, of course, with fundamentals. Chemicals
are divided into elements. There are four: air, earth, fire, and water.
Any number of delightful combinations can be made from these
elements, such as firewater, dacron, and chef’s salad.
Chemicals can be further divided into the classes of explosive
and non-explosive. A wise chemist always touches a match to his
chemicals before he begins an experiment.
A great variety of containers of different sizes and shapes are used
in a chemistry lab. There are tubes, vials, beakers, flasks,' pipettes,
and retorts. (A retort is also a snappy comeback, such as “Oh, yeah?”
or “So’s your old man!”
(Perhaps the most famous retort ever made was delivered by none
other than Noah Webster himself. It seems that one day Mr. Web
ster’s wife walked unexpectedly into Mr. Webster’s office and found
Mr. Webster’s secretary sitting on Mr. Webster’s knee. “Why Mr.
Webster!” cried Mr. Webster’s wife. “I am surprised!”
(“No, my dear,” he replied. “I am surprised. You are astonished.”
(Well, sir, it must be admitted that old Mr. Webster got off a
good one, but still one can not help wishing he had spent less time
trifling with his secretary, and more time working on his diction
ary. Many of his definitions show an appalling want of scholarship.
Take, for instance, what happened to me not long ago. I went to the
dictionary to look up “houghband” which is a band that you pass
around the leg and neck of an animal. At the time I was planning
to pass bands around the legs and necks of some animals, and I
wanted to be sure I ordered the right thing.
(Well sir, thumbing through the H’s in the dictionary, I hap
pened to come across “horse.” And this is how Mr. Webster defines
“horse”—“a large, solid hoofed herbivorous mammal, used as a
draft animal.”
(Now this, I submit, is just plain sloppiness. The most cursory ,
investigation would have shown Mr. Webster that horses are not
mammals. Mammals give milk. Horses do not give milk. It has to be
taken from them under the most severe duress.
(Nor is the horse a draft animal, as Mr. Webster says. Man is a
draft animal. Mr. Webster pbviously had the cavalry in mind, but ,
even in the cavalry it is men who are drafted. Horses volunteer.)
But I digress. We were discussing chemistry. I have told you the
most important aspects, but there are many more—far too many
to cover in the space remaining here. However, I am sure that there
is a fine chemistry lab at your very own college. Why don’t you go up
some afternoon and poke around? Make a kind of fun day out of it.
Bring ukeleles. Wear funny hats. Toast frankfurters on the Bunsen
burners. Be gay, be merry, be loose, for chemistry is your friend!
©Max Shulman, 1954
This column is brought to you by the makers of PHILIP MORRIS
who think you would enjoy their cigarette.