Page 4 THE BATTALION THURSDAY MORNING, NOVEMBER 18, 1943 OFFICIAL NOTICES Classified Two soldiers wives desire apartment (furnished) for 1 small year houses (one) Both ■ in or near College Station, work, don’t smoke or drink. No children vacancies or future vacancies. Blease notify Mrs. Fox, P. 0. Box 4217, College Station (South Station) Texas. smo or pets. Are interested future vacancies. Please notify LOST—A Log-Log Decitrig between Hotard Hall and Mil: Identification: Name inside of Decitrig Slide rule case. Floyd R. McClain. Finder contact Floyd R. McClain, Room 116 Hotard Hall, or Battalion Office. Reward. Will the person who removed the books and slide rule from Room 310, Academic building, between ten and eleven o’clock Friday morning, Nov. 12,'' please return them to the Commandant’s Office. No questions will be asked. Executive Offices All etudents registered from foreign countries must report to the Registrar’s Office as soon as possible. The Government has requested us to secure certain infor mation from you. H, L. HEATON, Registrar. The Library is trying to locate its copy of the Special laws of Texas passed by the 46th Legislature, Regular session, 1939. Please communicate with Miss McFrancis. Three Candidates At Camp Hood OCS Get Lts. Ranks Newbury, Frank, and Marison Are Baseball Stars; 48th Class Out Three candiates who helped lead the OCS Regiment baseball team to the Class B League champion ship of Camp Hood and to the runner-up spot in the camp champ ionship play-off last season, grad uated with the 48th Class today, when they received their commis sions as second lieutenants. James Newberry, Jr., Charles Frank, and David Madison are the three stars who have played their last games as enlisted men at the Tank Destroyer School. Lt. Newberry attended Texas A. & M. for three and a half years, where he played football and base ball. He played shortstop for OCS, and was one of the most consistent bitters on the club. Lt. Frank attended Illinois Col lege at Jacksonville, Illinois, be fore entering the Army. There he won letters in football, basketball and baseball, and in 1939 had a try-out with the Cleveland Indians. He played first base for the OCS team. Trimming: Tabs Squadron I Well, Gentlemen, here we are again getting ready to bring you another column with all the news and dirt about our squadron- This newly formed flight 18 is really getting in to the swing of things. They have Medical Aid in the Science building. Enter Room 23 and behold, hanging from the ceiling was a human skeleton. Well, the boys played around with it for a while, until someone got the bright idea to light a cigarette and put it in the mouth of the skeleton. It was left there for the instructor to view, but when he came in, he didn’t notice it. The men were very disappointed. Don’t worry, gentle men, you will get something that will work eventually. Sitting here typing this thing, we are getting some very good laughs. About five men have tried walking out of headquarters, and have been coming right back with faces as white as ghosts. We final ly were able to calm one of the men where he was in a position to talk. The reason these men were so terrified was only due to the fact that Squadron I is on the ball. Mr. Bellinfante is on guard out side of headquarters, and has been halting anyone as far away as he can possibly see with his 20/20 vision. Then he makes his victim approach, put his credentials on the ground, do an about face, and walk away so that he may look at them. That’s the spirit, Mr. Bellin fante, but we are praying that you don’t stop us when we are ready to leave. Well, we have had our first forced landing and casualty due to flying, and both are credited to Mr. Lorenzetti. Monday afternoon, the aforementioned gentleman was flying peacefully through the air; cough, choke, sputter, and the plane developed motor trouble. But as with all story book heroes, the plane landed safely, and our hero emerged without a scratch. Then Tuesday afternoon, Mr. Lorenzetti was turning the prop, but forgot to take his hand away, and when the prop came around, his hand came out the worse for the meet ing, but it was nothing more than a slight cut. How did this title of “Little Zab” get attached to your name, Mr. Don Powers? Lt. Madison attended Louisiana State University for four years, where he was one of the greatest pitchers, ever developed at that school. He hurled brilliant ball for the OCS nine here, too. LOUPOT’S Watch Dog of the Aggies Mr. Berardinelli was enjoying his taxiing along the ground, but for a minute thought he was play ing golf. He had a thousand-acre area to ride on, and his instructor had to complain to him that he had to find the only hole in that large space to taxi the plane into. Well, due to this guard duty that is being handed out to our squadron, the newspaper staff is short handed tonight, and there fore a little short of material for the column. We will close, with a Army Exchange Service Uniforms Army Exchange Service Uniform $44.50 Army Exchange Service Pink Slacks $12.00 Army Exchange Service Short Overcoat $29.75 Officers Regulation Dress Caps $5.00 to $16.50 Dark Green Gabardine Shirts $5.00 to $17.50 f X )aldrop ft (5. “Two Convenient Stores” College Bryan James L. Anderson A1 Lorenaetti Jack Per»ky._ Ed Callahan Paul McGinniss M. Soto... Editor-in-Chief .Manacinc Editor Associate Editor’ Associate Editor Associate Editor Sports Editor F. W. Hennessee Staff Artist Woddrow W. Harris Squadron I Editor F. W. Yeutter Squadron II Editor Winsor Mo wry Squd. Ill Editor R. E. Wolf Squd. IV Editor Paine A. Carson Squadron V Editor Reporters: Anthony Castellurcio, Earl Turner, Theodore Wilson. Joseph Canter, Ted Levine, William R. Fitzgerald, Leroy Mueller, Robert Brien, P. H. Dillard, R. E. Otto. The ACTD is written and edited by Aviation students of the 308th College Training Detachment, College Station. Spotlight on Sports The Squadron I quintet defeat ed Squadron IV Monday by a score of 48 to 36- Squadron I start ed their reserves who played till the half time. The score at the half was 20 to 19 in favor of Squadron IV. At the beginning of the half, Squadron I started the first string who gained a safe lead. The reserves went in again this time to hold their own. Squadron II will begin to tumble shortly. The art of doing rolls and flips will aid you in flying; ask Squadron I. What’s this? Instruction in Vol leyball. Squadron I’s “Hot Pilots” have been learning the tricks of this game, the tricky serve, the spike, and the pass, not as easy as it looks, is it? In perhaps the roughest game yet Squadron II “Five” defeated the “Blue Quintet” of Squadron V by a score of 56 to 30. The offi cials had a field day calling fouls. They did a good job of calling the game under the circumstances. Players eliminated through fouls were Rau of V and Norris of III. T’he outstanding players were Orr of V, Norris, Kueck, and Caupal for III. The game was fast and it wasn’t uncommon to see a kick or a block. The climax of this ter rific game was when a Squadron V man executed a beautiful body block to stop a Squadron III score. The game of games will be played Saturday between undefeat ed Notre Dame and the Iowa Pre- Flight. Both of these ball clubs have won eight straight games. Our choice is Notre Dame. What do you think? reminder: Relax, Mister, relax! Miss Lana Turner, or should I say Mr. Land, Love, and Calvert, what’s this I hear about your changing colors of your hair over night? You don’t have to go to all that trouble to get red-hair, just worry a lot like Misters Callahan and Crane. Mr. Vacci was told by his in structor to go into a spin- After completing 7 spins, Mr. Vacci looked around for moral support. A little dizzy, mister? I think Sgt. Hutcheson’s speech came at the most opportune time. It seems the fellows took it to heart and won the review; also cleaned up their barracks like new. Thanks a lot for getting us on the ball, Sgt. Also regards to Sgts. Damsky, Bates and Otto. Contact Squadron II It’s about time for a little humor around here. Everybody and every thing has been on the serious side for the past ten days. Don’t get me wrong, there is a time and place for being serious, but I’m not in the mood. Did you hear about Mr. Van Weren who saved all the money he would have spent on beer, and then spent it on beer? How about mechanic Mascaro who thought he could tell the horsepower of a jeep by lifting the hood and counting the plugs. And then there’s Mr. Esty who took the streetcar home, but his ^mother made him take it back. And now we have our Book Section. Condensed from THE INHUMAN COMEDY by William Soybean Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Condensed by HOW GREEN WAS MY VALET “Why didn’t you press my pants, Jeeves?” “I didn't know how, sir!” Condensed from THE MOON AND SIX PANTS A dozen pairs of trousers dangled from the clothesline and their shadows swished in the moonlight. And now our special depart ment • . . Girls who were raised on cod liver oil have legs like this ! 1 Girls who ride horses in the park Wing 1 News DAY IS DRAWING NEAR Hurry! hurry! only two days be fore the Wing Ball. Yes, get your date, shine up your dancing feet and start squirming. Come on, jit terbugs, take out your reat-pleat and zoot-suit and let’s dance. Flash! Flash! Detachment Sweet heart will arrive Friday noon, and what a sweetheart. This will be a night that will linger long in the memory of all the Beavers who are present, so all of you Eager Beavers, make a little note in your network of brains to make this the most enjoyable time you have ever had. What a band, boy oh boy, this Blackland Field band cooks with helium. It’s strictly steam on the beam, fellas- What an aggregation, what a crew of musicians, what an outfit. No kidding, Beavers, this band will make Uncle Joe do a loop in his grave. * Gentlemen! Let us prepare for the coming Wing Ball. As far as we know, the last one was not up to Beaver tradition. Most of the girls said they didn’t have enough dances. What say you swingeroos, let’s dance them right off the dance floor. If you don’t know how to dance, get one of your bunk-mates to teach you how in your spare time. As an old philosopher once said, “I’d rather make seven mis takes than not do it at all.” On this coming Saturday we must make a good impression on the gals attending. If we do this we shall have many bigger and better Wing Balls in the future. Plans have been set up to give our Sweetheart a grand welcome both at the Station and at the dance. She will be awarded a $100 bond and will be the queen of them all come Wing Ball night. All you men who think you have witnessed the seven wonders of the world will without any doubt at all see the eighth wonder Saturday night. The lights are on, the Beavers’ set and then ? ? ? In walks the wonder ful, glamorous, charming Miss of them all. Miss Patricia Travis of Indiana is her name. Maybe she will bring some old “Fighting Irish” spirit with her. I guess the Air Corps and Miss Travis should get along just fine when it comes to spirit and sociability. have legs like this ( ) Girls at night club bars who keep saying “Here’s How”, have legs like this ) ( And we might add: Girls who have good judgment, have legs like this X. Our shy Mr- Grimstead was too modest to go near a car when he heard the gears were stripped. These College Station busses have a new motto—“The Public Be Jammed.” And then we have Mr. Vanover who came out on the drill field with a bathing suit on. He finally ran into a certain C.S. student of ficer who asked, “Why the bathing suit, Mr?” “I am going to take a swim in the ocean,” he said. “Swim in the ocean? Why the ocean is 500 miles from here.” Mr. Vanover whistled in amaze ment, “500 miles? Boy, is this a beach!” Mr. Miller’s book is just about finished, so we’ll borrow a little phrase from Mr. Woodfint: Quote, Krangefllapenmurmer griffolplan- krnderfur—Which translated from double talk means. So long sports, we’ll be seeing you . . . Second oldest college publication in the country is The Round Table of Beloit College, Beloit, Wiscon sin. It was founded in 1853. A student at seventy-five at In diana University! That’s Manfred W. Deputy of Vernon, Indiana, who enrolled this fall to work for the Ph. D. degree in philosophy. He entered the University for the first time m 1894 when, said Mr. Depu ty, ‘There were 450 students and three mam buildings.” He received • 13 in P hilos °Phy in 1904 and m 19 . 05 he got his master’s de gree in education. “EXHAUST” Squadron V While snooping around trying to dig up dirt for our column, we overheard Mr. Anderson talking to the Wing Ball Committees. From all I could hear it is going to be the biggest event that has ever been held on the campus. The Air Corps sweetheart is to arrive on the train Friday at 12:16. She will ar rive with her escort, and be met by who? That is the question. In fact that is the $64’ question. We understand that Mr. Anderson has been trying to buy some OLD SPICE. It couldn’t be that he will be at the train. Some of the boys have been shining sabers, and looking for white gloves. Wonder whether there will be any brass? The Wolves or the Beavers are after the Women again, so if you haven’t signed on the door to meet the train or the busses to get the girls that come in from Houston or Dallas you had better hurry. There are to be (60) girls for each Squadron. After about three months of tiresome study we have found out why some of the beys have been turning in clean towels each week at linen exchange. While walking through some of the ramps we saw some of the boys coming out of the showers and shaking themselves like dogs to get dry. It also ex plains where all the noise comes from. It is the Beavers barking like wolves to see who is going to use the shower first. Isn’t that right, Mr. Cummings? We were all glad to turn over to Squadron I the guard duties we received while flying| They are, more than on the ball. They start yelling for lights out at tattoo. You have our sympathy boys; we had it for a month. That’s all for this time. The O. D. is running his hands through his hair; if we don’t stop, the poor fellow won’t have any hair. Hangar Flying Squadron III War-time pressure finds Dr. Wilson T. Lawson, oldest living graduate of Wabash College en joying good health and maintain ing office hours in his home town, Danville, Ind. Dr. Lawson is carry ing on as Hendricks County Health Commissioner. Lr. Lawson was a member of the graduating class of 1876. NAVY MEN Let Us Do Your Altering LAUTERSTEIN’S LOUPOT’S Trade Wtih Lou — He’s Right With You! Dry those tears of anguish, fans, and stifle those heart-rending sobs. After a short absence we’re back at the same old stand ready and rarin’ to go; so stick with old 66 and we’ll dissect somebody’s self confidence . . . And while we are speaking of things being official, we bring to your attention the sad case of one Mr. Regal, the Hound of the Giggervilles, who came out with the sad lament yesterday: “I only got ten men this morning for being late. I’ll have to get on the ball.” Let’s give him a hand, gen tlemen, and lay in bed for an extra ten minutes and make his little heart glad. Incidentally, if the above-mentioned character wishes to doubt our claims, we can prove it by witnesses, can’t we, Mr. Peter son? . . . What is the story on Mister H. Martin’s disappearing bed ? Ask Mr. Shambolin, he might know. He and Mr. Leroy Muller were also in on that deal about the missing bedclothes, in case Mr- Tommie Roberts would like to know. And while we are on the distasteful subject of Mr. S., in case he offers you some chewing gum, don’t take it. You know what we mean, Len ... By the way, the basketball club evened up an old score with Squadron V the other night, and from what we hear the proceedings were right rough. The score, incidentally, was 56-30. Way to go, gang . . . This item has al ready been printed in this column, but the paper in which it was print ed was destroyed in the fumiga tion of Foster Hall. We think this particular article is really rich, so we are printing it again- It goes like this—the Connecticut Yankee, Mr. Milton Smith, of the Hart ford Smythes, was breezing along fine with the little lady back home when out of a clear sky she came through with this morale buster— “Dearest darling Milton: I find this a little hard to express, but I hope you won’t hold it against me. I met a boy a little while ago who was crazy about me. He has been sent to North Africa but before he went he sort of made an under standing with me. So unless I get a ring for Christmas you are get ting the well known brush-off.” (Incidentally, all this news is con tributed by Mr. Scoop Merzbacher, who is supposed to be a friend of Milton C’s.) We got in touch with the elder Mr. Smith, Wayne A, and attempted to sound him out on the subject. He looked at his half crazed brother madly sending out letters to mail order houses re- Thumbs Up Squadron IV Three cheers for Squadron IV! It looks as if we have a lot more on the ball than we have been given credit for. And from all in dications, we are really striving to obtain a ribbon for our guidon. Our Squadron Commander, Mr. Murphy, has put to use a word he has learned in physics—in rear ranging each of our flights so a perfect acceleration of heighth can be seen by the reviewing officers. Really fellows, our mess forma tion are steadily improving. I guess we’re becoming aware of all the dips on the Military walk. The price for language not be fitting an Aviation Student is high in Room F-6 of Hart Hall. Mesrs. Wehrhan, Swenson and Ull- man have agreed to assess each offender of our native tongue — five cents. The dollar and a half contributed thus far has been used to buy candy bars. Even higher stakes are set for anyone violating a pledge not to smoke. It's one dollar! Note: No one has smoked since pledging. Ill we can say is, “It can’t last boys, for you have to pay.” Have you heard how Mr. Hudkins stays awake in his afternoon classes—Answer: he eats burnt matches and acorns. What a snack! It was really great seeing Mis ters James Hamilton, Gene Harte and Rex Hall varnishing the furni ture of their room. They’re still trying to find an algebraic equa tion to determine the value of x, y, and z since the cost of the brush, sandpaper and varnish was seven ty cents. It has come to our attention that Mr. Charles Franklin has been lead ing a hard life since he purchased an eight dollar shaving brush to use and lose in the army. Perhaps, signing the payroll last Tuesday, helped to relieve some of this ten sion! Well, I hate to leave ya, but I can hear the follows sining, “Lay That Whistle Down, Sarg,” as they fall-out. So I know it’s time to go—guess we’ll play some more speedball today. questing free samples of gen-yoo- wine imitation diamond rings, and sighed “He’s so young, so very young.” For further details see Mr. Stab-in-the-back “Merzbacher.” He is doing all this informing on his roommate. As far as Mr. Milton C. is concerned, we can just give out with a loud and long—“SUCKER” • . . And that about winds us up, because here comes our keeper to lock us up for the night, so we’ll see you later. TOWN HALL X m A HUMAN TORNADO ”—n,y.Her. Mh. S. HUROK presents The World's Greatest Flamenco Dancol CARMCM' AMAYA' AND NIB I HIT GYPSY INSUUU / 8-00 pm Guion Hall Tickets Now on Sale at Student Activities Office General Admission 50