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Johnny asked—Mary refuMK).
Johnny begged—Mary bushed.
Johnny insisted—Mary gave in.
So little Johnny''carried Mary’s books for bee.
*
“Are you troubled with improper thoughts!'
“Naw, I enjoy them.”
—Lampoon.
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i*
•Rammer-Jammer
•T ¥ •
Where in hell have I seen you before!
What part of hell are you from!
Who gave the bride away!
1 could have, but I kept my mouth shut.
—Covered Wagon
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Then there was the Scot who learned Braille so he hotlVd
An egotist is a giyl who persists in talking about herself
cm are.
—Jack-o-lantem
when you want to tell her how wonderful you are
I .*
read in bed without burning the lights.
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i* rv
i i.
—DuDo
‘ r IT* *
I
“Got a quarter for a room tonight. Mister?* the tramp
* ’ * “ ‘ l
He: “Gosh, but I’d like to make your dreams come true.
She: 111 slap your face if you try it.
—State Lion
*■
V I .
Jf
ssked the well dressed gentleman
“No,” was the reply. ~
“Gotta dime for a ham sandwich!”
“No.” r*
“Gotta nickle, fbr a cup of coffe!” f
“No.” I
“Huh, you’re in a hell of a fix. aintcha!
ft:
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lik«)
.SWW|
mA
Others
are
built
more
M ■ i '
First Son: Father, I did something awful last night and)
I need ten thousand dollars or she’ll sue.
Father: It’s a lot of money, but anything to save the
family honor. <Makes out check.)
‘I
I
Second Son: Father. I got in trouble last night and I
need ten thousand dollars or She’ll sue.
Father: It’s all I’ve got in the world, but I guess
v anything is better than dragging doom the family name.
< Makes out check.)
Daughter: Father. I did something dreadful last night—
Father: Ah, now we collect.
\ —Sour Owl
li L. 4- 1 l a All' \
but
They al .’end up like
this
—Texas BiMgdt i -
A\
A
r
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✓
■* i I 4
fishing in northern M^in recently.
Hit, the biggest he had ever landed
A Boston man was
He caught a big lake trout,
in his long and busy life. He wa> elated. He was iso delighted
that he telegraphed his wife, •I’ve got one. T Weighs » cht
pounds and it is a beauty!”_He received the follodring answer:
“So have L Come home.” ! \ ^ JL
O'.
l.vV
V
A
h A dumb girl
dope to relieve pain
doctor ordered
l'HKS( KIITION: LOV
is a dope, a dope is a
in. Therefore a dumb |
L
*
LOVE
drug. Doctors give
girl is jfcst what the
^7
^7
Hi
\
—Rice Owl
‘"l jtidt dropped in with the rest of my act
to talk about that raise.**
THE BATTALION