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All roll'‘ge boys (and especially A*fjc»es) whose bodies
aren't crossly deformed and who don't possess child-fright^** *
ing faces, are going to receive, m varying quantities through-
oat, their college careers, so-called “fan mail** from mem
bers of the opposite sex. It seems to be a sad but true fact .
it the longer we remain the college the less of the pro
verbial faa mail were are blessed (?) with. Seldom, if e4tor,
during, our “fish" year is our P. O. box empty; bat bsudaMS 1
beginOo slacken noticeably daring the second year, and it's '
nip and turk^ill the way (so I am told) during the third and
fourth yeard?.
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I have Itever known an Aggie who didn't express aotnc
sign of aatipfaction on receiving's letter from a girl; that
is, if she w still within a possible “romance** age—say
between 14 and 40. But, as much as we admittedly like to
receive this fan mail, it seems to me (and I don't think I am-j
alone in this reasoning) that the gals have settled'into'a few
well worn ruts. For over nineteen-hundred and thirty-nine
years the petticoat wearers have been cutting these ruts
deeper and deeper and by now* they are becoming fairly ob
vious—even boresome. I
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I don't intend to represent myself as a connoisseur of
feminine letters, but I do believe that the average Joe College
can easily discern the six major approaches that girls nourj
use in their letters and have been using since Eve wrotu!
Adam the first letter (if she did). .1 • |
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The First Approach—the m u t« , u < K
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* Winston's Simplified Dictionary. Advanced Edition, de
fines “mush” as “any soft, thick mixture.” “that which ia
effusively sentimental,** and Mr. Winston's definition ac
curately applies to a letter of this nature. This type letter
•hardly merits discussion because its obvipup ftome and get
me** attitude is no tribute to th^ “line** or probable romantica!
qualities of the girl who write* it.
The Second Approach—the mercenary attack
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* (a) The girl that writes this type letter doesn’t particu
larly care what she says or hpw you take It; but she prefers
that you take it the wrong way—or the right, depending oU
your point of view. At any rate, her principal aim to to get
all you’ve got and then fo hell with you.
(b) Then there ia the less subtle attack under this ap
proach made by the girl who )*** known you in the dim 4**
past but who ha an t written for several months. However, a
letter is always forthcoming a f4w weeks before Christmas,
and the affair usually reaches an instant termination when
she receives the expected and “fisbed-for” gift. A more
certain way to put- aqJuamediate end to this type of edk-
refepondence is to neglect to send the gift. (However, this is
rather rough on the girl who has, after all. spent several
cents postage money on you. Besides; this isn't fair; it juat
isn’t done—so the girls believe!) ,1 v J \ \
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©M WE
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The Third 'Approach—the deceitful tnsinuative attack
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I This, I think, is one of the most widely used and one if'
the most effective approaches. Some girls will try to insin
uate something that they* really don’t mean. That ia, a girl
may write “things” which suggest that you have almost got
her on the proverbial and well-known line. She infers that
all you need to do to make the final “push** is to come to
Deaton, Austin, or wherever she may be. However, the feel
ing of enlightenment that many a poor Aggie has received
after making a two op* three-hundred*mile trip can only bt
likened to Public Disappointment Nsmber One. As far as 1
Hi
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. . . and this ia bow the |
always tarns out NOT to be!
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can determine, the gefweal idea behind this approach is baaed
on a girl’s burning desire to be popular. Evidently, the abort-
cut to being popular is to be true to no leas than a dosen
boys! Thus a girl believes that she has esused a round dosen
boys to “fall” for her—which \* nice work if she is woman
enough to handle it. Incidentally, it may be said here that
the evident purpose of nearly all fan mail is toward the end
ii of popularity.
! ♦
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