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He's been drinking fixattf attain!'
Some people wonder what the ^Jarman weddimr
ceremony is like. It’s something like tfiis:
Preacher (to groom) : “L>o you ti^kc these women
to Ik* your lawfully \vt*<ldt*d wives?”
(•room: “l do.”
Preacher (to brides): “Do you take this man to
lie your lawfully wedded husband?” ,
“Brides: “We do.”
Preacher:“Some of you girls in the back will have
to speak louder if you want to In* included in this.”
vfte rounded a bend at close to forty. A sudden l
skid and the car overturned. They found themselves f
sitting together, unhurt, alongside the completely
smashed car. He put his arm around her waist, but
she drew away.
“It’s all very nice,” she sighed, “but wouldn’t i
have l>ecn easier to run out of gas?”
1 r
There was a little lawyer man.
Who gently smileti as he began
Her dear husband’s will bo scan.
Thinking of his coming fee,
He said to her (juite tenderly,
“You,have a fine, fat teg-a-cy!”
The next day when he woke in l>cd
With plasters ’round his broken head
He wondered what in hell he said.
i*
“How did it happen that Willie and ^Nellie wen*
kicked out of the auto show?”
“Oh, they got into one of the cars and forgot
where the^were.”
v
“Did you know, dear, that that tunnel we
passed through was two miles long and cast $12,000,-
000?” asked the young man of his sweetheart.
“Oh, really, did it?” she replied, as she started to
rearrange her disheveled hair. “Well, it was worth it,
wasn t it 7
« A
Henderson: Why are you in the air force now? I
thought you were in the cavalry.
Peterson: I got t ransferred.
Henderson: Why was that?
Peterson: Well, after an airplane throws you out,
it doesn’t generally walk over and bite you.
-The Oil Weeklv
Potts was a great man. At his death there wer*
^three towns named after him: Pottsville, Pottstowij,
and (’haml>ersburg.”
* n
“I see in.the pa|H»r that a widower with nine chil
dren has married a widow with seven children.”
“That was not marriage. That was a merger.”
Doc— There’s no need to worry about your wife. *
You’ll have a different woman when she gets back
from the hospital.”
Anxious hubby— And what if she finds it out?
“Give an example of period furniture.”
“Well, 1 should say an electric .chair, because it
ends a sentence.”
The Bachelor’s Ballad
i
Say it with flowers,
Sav it with sweets, k .
. . ^ * t
Sav it with kisses.
And say it with eats.
Say it with jewelry.
Say it with drink.
But whatever you do,
Don’t say it with ink.