THE BATTALION
5
CLASS ISSUES
OF BATTALION
APPEAR SOON
Under Classmen Promise Great
Wealth of Feature Material, Novel
Cartooning, Rich Humor and
Strong Class Spirit.
At present the tentative date for
the appearance of the first class is
sue of The Battalion is March 25th.
The Juniors, Sophomores, and Fresh
men will manage and edit their class
editions consecutively, alternating-
each special issue with one published
by the regular staff.
For a number of years, due prin
cipally to the smallness of the class,
the Seniors have not published a class
edition but an effort will be made dur
ing the present term to inaugurate
this custom with the Class of ’21, the
largest Senior Class in the history of
the College.
The underclassmen have in their
ranks many of the most humorous and
brilliant writers in College at the
time as well as the majority of the
artists and cartoonists, thus offering-
much promise for popular numbers.
The particular style of class edi
tions in favor at A. and M. involves
more class spii'it, wit, and humor than
is the custom with other institutions
and the special editions are customar
ily exceedingly popular over the cam
pus and state.
DR. FOSTER TO BE ON
CAMPUS TWO DAYS.
Dr. Allen K. Foster, one of the
greatest religious speakers in the
country and Enlistment Secretary for
the Promotion Board of the Northern
Baptist Convention, will address two
mass meetings on Sunday, they being
the regular convocation and a con
solidated meeting in Guion Hall at 6:45
p. m. He will also conduct numerous
conferences and interviews with stu
dent and teaching staff leaders and
others interested in the work.
One feature of especial importance
in Dr. Foster’s visit will be the Open
Forum conducted by him on Monday
night at 7:30 in the Airdome. Since
he is a specialist in this work, great
things are expected to come from this
meeting.
Dr. Foster i§ on a tour of 112 Col
leges in the United States and Canada
and comes to us from Oklahoma A.
and M. The Southwestern Depart
ment of the Y. M. C. A. brings him to
College Station.
A. H. STUDENTS
COACH TEAMS
S. C. Evans, superintendent of the
Non-Collegiate Stock Judging Con
test recently held at the Fort Worth
Fat Stock Show, states that the teams
winning the first seven places in the
contest were coached by present stu
dents in A. H. or by graduates of this
institution.
The winning team, Granger High
School, was coached by E. C. Elam, <
’17. Second place was won by the |
Masonic Orphan Home team of Ft.
Worth under the guidance of an ex-
Aggie, while third place went to the
Penelope team under the direction
of “Dad” Colvin, ’20. “Dad” was
assisted by Lewis, Luker, and Men-
zies. Lewis making a trip to Pene
lope and working the men out there
for several days previous to the con
test. Fourth place went to the A.
and M. Consolidated Rural School,
coached by Mowery. Mowery had
worked his team only about three
weeks and did exceedingly well as
he had entirely new men and only
a limited time to work. One of his
men won third place as an individual.
The next three! places were carried
off by teams coached by ex-Farmers.
NEWS FROM
THE Y. M, C. A.
Mrs. John A. Erhard Jr., of Dallas,
will sing in the Airdome Saturday
night between the feature show and
the carnival. She will also sing at
the convocational service on Sunday
morning. Mrs. Erhard is a singer of
great repute and has a most wonder
ful voice.
* A *
The “Y” will keep open house on
Saturday night after the picture show.
There will be songs and music around
the piano and various games will be
played.
BETWEEN SEASON
ATHLETICS ARE IN
PROGRESS NOW
Papa Harvie Matthews, head coach
and instigator; C. P. Fountain,
Assistant.
Billie Dougherty, Business Manager;
Itch Attebery, Assistant.
(Editor’s Note: The Powder Puff
Edition would be incomplete without
some mention of SPORTS, since they
prevail in such large quantities among
the ranks of the Aggies.)
SING A SONG OF POWDER PUFFS
and twenty ma _,
Y'e Gods! but girls are slow!
VLen the puffs are lost
The maids are in dire need;
laste ye to the beauty shop
Haste with all your speed.
'he maids before the mirrors
Powdering their noses,
'he beaus on snowy door-steps
With fast freezing toeses—
'he maids continue -to powder
Until the clock strikes nine—
'he beaus paint the door-steps red,
And leave the maids to pine.
—Nina Peeples.
Jttle Miss Huff
Using powder and puff,
lade herself most fair.
With powder and paint
She am what she aint,
All she lacks is the henna hair.
A MAIDEN WISE.
here was a maid in our town
nd she was wondrous wise,
he looked into her mirror
er nose out shown her eyes.
Tien she saw filer nose was shiny,
Hiat did this maiden do ?
he visited the beauty parlor
nd bought a puff or two.
—Nina Peeples.
;’s round and it’s white
.nd it’s hidden from sight—
But it accomplishes work enough.
:’s a friend in need,
nd a friend indeed—
My dear little powder puff.
ifhen exposed to view,
t may shock a few—
But ’tis I think only a bluff—
'or were they not here,
'he girls, I fear,
Would look on the world with dis
gust.
—“Pom Pom”.
fhen the morning sun is rising
nd the day has just begun,
he thing that’s most surprising
: the way one’s thoughts do run.
hough there’s no one near to see you
nd good rest you’ve had enough,
bu dreamily glance about the dres
ser,
o find the most esential thing to life
YOUR POWDER PUFF.
—“Vanity Fair.”
The Athletic Council met last night,
nd aften much deliberation and re
peated applicatibn of the powder puff,
elected the officers indicated at the
head of this column. The manage
ment joins the many friends of the
successful candidates in congratula
tions. As can be readily seen, the
officers were chosen according to pro
ficiency and specific ability along the
particular lines of duty of each office.
Horsemanship.
Captain Forbes’ class in equitation
reports increasing interest. The class
meets nightly—except when the moon
shines, and special attention is paid to
the handling of arms.
Bicycling.
Jappi Japour, head of the depart
ment of Bicycling, deserves the cut
ice pick. Under his fearless leader
ship, the department is making aston
ishing progress. The final goal of the
crew is to circumnavigate Governor
Ross, and judging by present pros
pects their cherished ambition will
be realized ’ere many more moons.
Penny Ante.
This sport bids fair to rival Mumble
Peg - in popularity. Dr. Fountain is
at present high man, with King Viv
ien running a close second. John
Rufus Strange is the man to whom all
credit for successs in this line of Ath
letics is due. Though modesty pre
vents his own heradling of the fact,
we wish to say for Johnnie that his
own knowledge of the game is mar
velous, and if his pupils are at all
apt, they stand a chance of cleaning-
up on all lose shekels about the
Campus and Faculty Room.
The Walking Club.
Since the Walkers on the Campus
are so numerous, a Walking Club was
imperative. The Campus cobblers are
boosting the movement, saying it’s
the sole duty to look after the inter
ests of the kadets. Casey also has
indorsed heartily such muscular ac
tivity as will affect the gustatory or
gans of thirst. The Co-Eds are in
dulging in the exciting pastime. Some
have actually walked as far as the
Main Entrance before accepting the
first ride offered.
Summer School Athletics.
The Athletic Council is delighted
to announce that D. X. Bible will be
a member of the summer school fac
ulty. His duty will be to develop in
terest in athletics, to satisfy the rural
Co-Eds longing for society, and gather
material from the viewpoint of an
eye-ball witness for next year’s
Powder Puff.
666 breaks a cold quicker than any I Rub-My-Tism relieves Rheumatism,
remedy we know. 1 Neuralgia, Sprains.
BEST ORIGINAL
STUNTS WILL BE
GIVEN PRIZES
Any latent stage talent along the
line of vaudeville will be given plenty
of opportunity to show up sometime in
the next four weeks. The moving-
picture management has decided to
offer prizes for the best “original”
stunts and by stunts we mean any
thing from a joke on up to a full com
edy in five acts or from a pipe smok
ing monkey to a wingless aviator that
is presented to the Saturday night pic
ture show audiences on any one of the
next four Saturday nights. These
stunts will be put on in the Airdome
between the feature picture and the
comedy. They will also be presented
in the “Y” Chapel but the prizes will
be awai’ded as to the presentation in
the airdome.
A. AND M. AT BAYLOR C.
He stood without the college gate;
He took a step inside;
He saw her skirt approaching,
And quickly stepped aside;
Yet he had to see HER
For that was why, see,
He’d come clear from A. and M.,
To visit Baylor C.
He shrugged his maily shoulders;
He stepped inside the gate;
He hastily looked about him
To see if it were too late
To make a dash for liberty
While he was yet free,
For he felt he’d rather be at A. and M.
Than here at Baylor C.
He saw a dozen pairs of eyes;
And a score or more of girls;
He wouldn’t have left then—
No, not for worlds.
He forgot that there was only ONE
Whom he had come to see,
And started in to entertain
The whole of Baylor C.
He laughed and talked;
Had the time of his life;
Played with the goldfish—
Forgot all worry and strife,
Never before in all of his life
Had he even dreamed to see
Such wonderfully jolly girls
As those at Baylor C.
Then he saw HER approaching,
And his heart grew faint with fear.
Would she be mad and angry
By his vamping all the girls here?
O, why had he been such a vamp?
He surely must have been crazy?
O, how he wished he were at A. and M.
Instead of at Baylor C.
Then he saw she was smiling,
And his withered spirits arose;
“Thanks, girls, for entertaining him,
While I was powdering my nose.”
Thus she dismissed them.
The girls, you see,
Had been entertaining A. and M.
While he waited for Baylor C.
TRULA HORNE,
President, Class of ’24, Baylor C.
THE EXCEPTION.
She cannot sew, she cannot cook,
She seldom looks inside a book.
I understand she does not know
Depew from Tullius Cicero.
I doubt if she hath ever heard
Of Tennyson, a single word,
And should you mention Browning,
she
Would think of tan shoes instantly.
For music she but slightly cares,
She canot sing the simplest airs.
Nor does she the piano play
E’en in the most indifferent way.
For bridge she’s not the slightest use
Can’t tell the ten spot from the duce,
And cannot see why he’s a chump
Who over trumps his partner’s trump.
She canot golf and at the net
She never won a single set.
She cannot sail the waters blue—
She cannot paddle a canoe.
She cannot run a chafing dish;
She cannot hunt, she canot fish;
And e’en in simplest terms, and terse,
I fear this maiden can’t converse.
Yet.—when I look upon her there
A smiling vision on the stair,
And when I hear her rippling laugh
At some soft whispered bit of chaff,
And how from out her eyes a light
Of flashing beauty ’lumes the night.
ONE thing she CAN DO thoroughly—
And that is ME! ! !
—Selected.
Weiners to the East,
Spuds to the West,
Rice to the Right
Chow to the Left.
Weiners, spuds, rice and chow,
We can’t get nothin’ else but this—
somehow.
Why is it that when a fellow tries to
borrow money everyone in school is
broke ?
CHEM. STUDENTS
MAKE TRIP
The Junioi’s and Seniors of the
Chemisti'j* Engineei'ing Depai’tment
spent the past week in one of the
most profitable commercial inspec
tion tours ever undex’taken by a body
of students. A total of 27 students
made the trip, there being seven
Seniors and 20 Juniors. These men
were treated with the greatest of
courtesy and accomodation from the
time that they left the College until
they returned. Perhaps the biggest
mystery discovered during the trip
was the location of a conveyer screw
by one of the Seniors and the conse-
quent inquiring as to its terminal.
Monday morning at eight o’clock
every student was in his place at
Cox - sicana and the inspection was ixn-
der way. The first fiimi visited was
the Magnolia Petroleum Company.
Here they were shown the finer points
of the oil industry. Next the Corsi
cana Brick Company was visited and
the process of brick making was
traced out. The Royal Coffee Com
pany was the next host. The Royal
Coffee Company next conducted the
group over their factory and served
them with hot coffee. The South
land Cotton Oil Company and Na-
vax - ro Manufacturing Company were
also visited in the forenoon.
The delegation was the guest of
the Cox - sicana Chamber of Commerce
for luncheon and then carried in
cars to visit the American Well and
Prospect Co., The Corsicana Cotton
Mill, and the Cortex Oil Well. Every
one caught the five-thirty car for
Dallas and met the next morning
ready for work.
The Texas Portland Cement Com
pany had the entire delegation as
their guests for breakfast at the Cafe
de Pains. After an exceptionally
good meal they were carried in cars
to visit this firms plant west of Dal
las. Here they traced the processes
of cement manufacturing from the
time that the rock is taken from the
ground to the final sacking of the
finished pi’oduct.
The same firm was again host to
the visitors at luncheon at the Ai'ts
Club with the Technical Club.
After luncheon they visited the
Junior Chamber of Commerce and
were carried in cars from there to
visit several plants over the city. The
sewerage disposal plant was first in
spected ; then a lai’ge cotton oil mill,
City’s filtration plant, and Smith’s
Ice Cream Factory. At the last place
every one was served with all the ice
cream and cake they could eat.
The following morning the Texas
Pe‘feroleum Company and Oak Cliff
Paper Mill were cai'efully inspected.
The Junior Chamber of Commerce
was host for luncheon at the Adol
phus Roof Garden. After visiting
the Dallas News and Acme Battery
Co., the days woi'k was declai'ed over
and the entire group turned as a man
to catch a car for S. M. U.
The fii'st Interui'ban car carried
them to Fox - t Worth the next morn
ing. Here they were met by repre
sentatives of Swift and Company and
were carried to the Stock Yards in
a special street car. After inspect
ing the Swift plant, they were the
guests of Armour and Company at
luncheon and were then conducted
on a tour of inspection over that
plant. The Athens Pottery Com
pany was the only other firm visited
that afternoon.
After inspecting the Piei’ce-Fox*-
dyce Peti'oleum Company’s plant and
the new Government Helium plant
they were entex - tained with kxncheon
by the Foi't Worth Rotai - y Club. In
the afternoon the Star Telegram,
Chevx - olet Motor Co., and Fox - t Worth
Laboratory Company were visited.
This ended the inspection part of the
txdp and the students were released
to do as they pleased. Some going
to their homes othei’s remaining in
Fort Woi'th to visit the Fat Stock
Show.
KISS PARSED.
Kiss is a conjunction because it con
nects. It is a verb because it signifies
to act and be acted upon. It is a prep
osition because it shows the person
kissed is no relation. It is a noun be
cause it is a name of something, both
common and proper, second person,
plural number because it takes moi’e
than one. Its gender is masculine and
feminine mixed. The case is gov
erned by light and circumstances.. It
should begin with a capital letter, of
ten repeated, long continued and end
ed with a period. A kiss should be
conjugated, but should never be de
clined.
WHAT IS A KISS?
A kiss is always a pi’onoun, because
she stands for it. It is masculine and
feminine gender mixed, therefore
common. It is a conjunction because it
connects. It is an interjection; at
least it sounds like one. It is plural
because it calls for another. It is
usually in opposition to hug; at least
it is sure to follow. A kiss can be
conjugated but never declined.
THE BOYS IN MY LIFE.
I’ve taken the boys as I’ve found them,
And taken them all with a grin—
I’ve found that all of them lie to me
And none of them are without sin.
I had a beau from aid Baylor,
Who was Baptist clear to the bone,
And if I had a good time in his pres
ence,
I had to have it alone.
Then a boy from State U. came woo
ing
With his letter of gold on his chest,
But he was so darned conceited
I had to go way for a rest.
Next, a beau from old S.M.U. came
smliing
As saintly as preachers can be—
But he took me to church just so
often,
That he proved too religious for me.
The haughty young Rice Ed conde
scended
To saunter in front of my eyes—
But he was so nice, this he-vamp from
Rice,
That he kept his head up in the skies.
Well, I left those boys as I found
them,
And tried the men who were grown;
But they were so loving, with their
turtle doveing
That I daren’t get closer than the
phone.
So I swore off of the men around me,
And said that for ever more,
Men never should hold my favor
And should be turned away from my
door.
Then a laddie in khaki came striding
Onto the campqs of my sight,
And I quickly forgot what I’d prom
ised,
And I knew him real well before night.
Well, this lad was just like the others,
Handing out the very same line,
But he used so much pep and vigor
That’s it’s an Aggie for me every
time.
—A. CONVERT.
A GAME OF THREE
When love is a game of three,
One heart can win but pain;
While two between them share the joy
That all had hoped to gain.
And one in it’s bitter sadness
Smiles on—-lest the others see,
But two in their new found gladness
Forget ’twas a game of three.
What ofteVi checks a fast man? A
bridal.
The College Community
STORE
ALL NEW AND FRESH
GROCERIES, CAN GOODS,
CAKES, ETC.
GIVE US YOUR ORDERS
G. O. TURNER, Manager
i >
FEEL BLUE !
*
Does everybody “misunder- ^
stand” you? All joy gone out of
life? Cheer up! It’s just your
system that’s “out of kilter.” A ^
few Chiropractic Adjustments
will put you on your feet. Make <|*
a new person of you. See
DR. A. R. COHN %
Today •fc
4. Rooms 32 and 33, Astin Bldg. T
•f! Phone 477.
•I* .
" , 3**3>* , l** , X ,> * , X'**l* e £ > *S* *l**l >,li S**% 3 *%**!**%*"%*
*!*•$*"S’4“ ,
*
G. S. PARKER
LUMBER
PHONE 41
•• BRYAN,
.TEXAS
!; THE FIRST NATIONAL ij
I BANK OF BRYAN
(Shxce 1873)
■ •
■ ■
«■
• •
the * *
$50,000.00 ;;
•jr Accounts Solicited Upon
•. most liberal terms
• • 4*
!, Capital and Surplus $250,000.00 ..
• • 4*
Undivided Profits
?
? EXCHANGE BARBER SHOP
l| Five First Class
T Barbers
? T. A. ADAMS, Proprietor
# Up-to-Date Work Done at
I the
I CAMPUS
SHOE SHOP
j. Our prices are right and we
make old shoes look like
new.
H0L1CK & SON
CAMPUS
BARBER SHOP
Eight chairs. One of the
best equipped shops in Tex
as. All kinds of
::
"
i
TONICS
Come to See Us
J. F. LAVINDER, Prop.
I
I
M.H. JAMES
THE
LEADING DRUGGIST
Ours is the
REXALL STORE
Everything in Drugs and
Toilet Articles
DR. W. H. LAWRENCE •f;
DENTIST
Res. Phone 558, Office Phone 521 %
4th Floor City Natl. Bank Bldg.
Bryan, Texas
The College Tailor
Next to Boyett’s Store
HIGH GRADE TAILORING
and Repairing
Boys Are Invited to Our Place
CALL AND SEE
GOOD THINGS TO EAT
In the way of Cakes
TDEI3E3 INTmxtV CJXTYT IE3
CADETS and CAMPUS PEOPLE
ARE INVITED TO CALL.