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About The Battalion. (College Station, Tex.) 1893-current | View Entire Issue (May 13, 1920)
10 THE BATTALION CASUALLY SPEAKING Many years ago a great Scotch poet pointed out the advantages of seeing ourselves as others see us This year the A. and M. Casuals have a very good chance to see themselves from the viewpoint of others and to hear about themselves as well. The mirror as held up for us by the cadet corps does not reflect a very flatter ing image on the whole, but at least we know our defects and that does some good. The concensus of the opinions freely and sometimes profanely ex pressed by Pershing’s understudies at this institution, brings out the startling fact that we are the great est bady of gold-brickers, reveille- shunners, sons of rest, exponents of the noble art of bunk fatigue, ho boes, tramps, I. W. W.’s, Bolsheviki and pure, honest-to-goodness down right loafers in captivity. Alhtough we cannot say that we quite agree with our friends and well-wishers, still we think that such a noted society as ours ought to be maintained up to its highest stan dards as a curiosity, if nothing bet ter. It is a very great distinction to be able to say that one belongs to such a collection of choice individ uals, to say the least of the pleasures to be derived from the privileges ex tended to the organization whole. In our defense we can say that the requirements for admission to this noble Band of Dalliance are as strict as those of the cadet corps. Any one able to distinguish call to quarters from pay call, or recall from assembly, anyone who feels severe muscular contraction of the right arm when passing an Army of ficer, or anyone who has ever used military hairbrushes, is not one of us. In fact, anyone showing the slightest sign of militarism is not capable of holding down a berth in the Royal Order of Casuals. Right here we wish to express our commiseration for those dapper youths who are so lucky as to be able to officiate in the early morning cal- esthenics exercises. We are sorrj; that our rising hours prohibit observ ing these and also numerous other privileges which we are told are very healthful and invigorating, and which develop self control, co-or dination and self-esteem, to say nothing of manly grace and a mili tary carriage, whatever that be. Our sidea of a military carriage is a caisson, a buckboard or an escort wagon, but of course we are not sup posed' to know anything about such matters. From our observations, we have seen quite a few of our number who still retain their characteristic gait, and we often have to remind our selves that thre are no cotton rows on the Military Walk when we see some veteran of the Safe-At-The- College war circulate past ,head up. chin out, arms swinging like a ne gro minstrel performer and abdom inal muscles trying to stimulate a corset-like shape. Were it not for the interest taken by the Casuals in the noble and nearly lost art of horizontal engi neering, that science would be as ex tinct as the dodo in this institution. We must pause here to pat ourselves on the back for preserving such an art, which will be so useful to pos terity. Surprising and sensational results have been obtained from re cent laboratory experiments made at a great sacrifice of time and labor, and we expect soon to publish the results in book forpi so that the world may know the secrets of long life and tranquility. We have suffered the loss of sev eral of our members, but as they seemed to be a type of heretic, we must be content. Maybe they got what they were looking for and may be they didn’t. Those wayward ones who mistook the Cavalry for a snap and hastened to join it in hopes it would be a close second to the Casual Company were probably dis appointed and certainly lead astray. Since then, however, we can boast of 100 per cent loyalty, for the rest of our members realize that the best place is home sweet home, where one may rest undisturbed as long as he desires without any evil influences or any demoralizing outside effects. To sa ythe least, the privilege of cuss ing the bugler to your heart’s con tent is worth the price of admission alone. In my opinion, the faculty ought to charge admission to the Casual Company, as it will be a very popular organization after this year. Most of our august body this year are casuals by virtue of service, (in the Y. M. C. A. Replacement Bat talions, Jewishmaster Corps, and elsewhere), but we predict that the number claiming exemption next year will increase to such an extent that several other dormitories will be needed to house our most honorable body of gold-brickers and horizontal engineers. While we are making suggestions, we might say that as so much honor and social distinction goes with our organization, it would not be a bad idea to provide us with a social sec retary or probably a couple of them. It is a shame the Cadet Corps can not be as popular with the ladies as we are, and as they may feel neglect ed, we will provide amusement for them at least once a year to kill the pangs of homesickness. ’23 “T’s” FOR MEAL-HOUNDS There is a rumor being spread broad-cast that “T’s” will be award ed to several of the students at A. and M. in recognition and in honor of their abilities to store away chow”. It is not known yet who is going to award the “T’s”, maybe the Athletic Council, maybe Coach Bible or Coach Driver, maybe even Prexy himself. However, we think the awarding ought to be done by Mr. Sbisa. It is such a great adver tisement for his wholesome and ap petizing food. And just think, some of the fel lows even “Gripe” about the food they get to eat. If one would only come into either of the Mess Halls at any meal hour and watch the per formances of any of the expert sword swallowers—watch the dishes being rapidly emptied—watch the waiters as they hasten to the kitchen with empty dishes and return with full ones, only to have to repeat the action with never a breathing spell, one would nevermore “Gripe”, and one would joyfully vote “yea” in stead of “Nay’ with regard to award ing “T’s” to meal-hounds. Note the expression “If one would watch these things.” That is just the trouble. Each one is too busy get ting his neck just as as close as pos sible to his own plate and consum ing as much food as possible, to pay any attention to his fellow chow- consumers in action. Why, if a man were to stand at one end of the Mess Hall and fire a pistol two inches above the shoulders of the man di rectly in front of him, the bullet and never touch a mans head, the men are that concentrated upon fill ing the empty chasm above their belt line. That good old saying, “Pull in your neck,” seems to have no place in Sbisa’s Mess Halls. But as we started out to say, there is a rumor that “T’s” will be awarded to several meal-hounds in this College. God pity the poor judges! There will be keen com petition. Andd from the looks now, it would seem that only those men on the training tables do not deserve them ,and they would, if they were eligible. ’23- THE GRIPER’S CLUB the be- Fish Take Notice: Another chance to get into limelight! Another chance to come in time one of the “Big” men of the College. Don’t join the De bating Club or go out for athletic teams where previous experience and hard work count more than any thing. Here’s your chance to be come one of the “big” men with ab solutely no effort on your part. No previous experience requu*ed. Just join and the rest will come natural to you. Join the Griper’s Club—ab solutely the latest thing at this Col lege, and it’s bound to grow. Get in now and grow up with the institu- would go clear to the opposite wall, I tion. Of course, the Seniors will be the Chief Gripers, as they have been here the longest, and consequently have the most experience. But just think how you will develop, if you take them as a model of what to do, and take the Sophs as a model of what not to do. Freshmen, can you not see on what an exalted plane you will soon be, if you will just use the Sophs as an example of “What not to do to Succeed?” Come on out to the next performance of the club and listen to this discussion by A. Soph: “I object to living on a steady diet of sawdust and shavings even though I am a blockhead.” You will see from this that this is your long looked for opportunity to eventually achieve distinction in Col lege. Then come ont and work for the little wooden hammer which is to be awarded to all distinguished gripers, and which will soon over rate a mere “T”. •k—I—rk—v'vk-k-k'k-'rk-k-k**!—!**!—!-*r*!**rk**!”i—> ❖ -v ❖ *:• ❖ -v •I* •v ❖ ❖ GOODYEAR SYSTEM for the Best and Quickest SHOE REPAIRING. See BRYAN SHOE HOSPITAL