I- B M; m m i- 'i -H- r 8u|>po*«, dear readier, that you Tada Forbe< has a bad co!d. He ;Shou|d awake one nuirnihft oBd ftnd sajrs that Saturday nitrht he ifdt to i •un still unrisen. And “Soupy ’ ahould blow for dinner and the sun still unrisen. Woald you bv sur- rfully hot at the amioiae and then prised? • You say, “Tell me some* j I: l! i.1. w € i r m .PH thinr improbable.”? Then su| yoa ahould see one mormhir, the itary Walk with Charles E. h'rtpoy walking down it in a pair of trousiers •with a hole in the seat. Wopld you yell S. O. S. ioasly alTeoted; him. ( He shouldn't try to iro to* # picture show bafor*’ a dance. * Bdt you needn't trorry. **TVda”;reniember I>oc KKlintrer is .t member of the’ All-American M. D's. as>well as of the baseball team. Suppose, dear reader, thht one of hi >11 S. O. S.~mearun»r “Sea O,'Seamstmss.*'? Or suppt someone should start the rumor t| IPresty was to be on the < d pus for three consecutive «iays. 'ffhe Soph is s peculiar isnifial. When he is your, friend he will k-o'' the limit for you, but ait a rule? ho is a skeptic and temperamental to boofcl He also possesses very* -IsUKd boards, and is sometimes entirely d> void of humor. When meeting a Soph for the first time, one should approach him dip- lomaticaDyi Always keep a mean eye on that board too, for just as you are well set to shako his hand, he m ol decide to start “action rear'* without ssmuch as a by your leave. But after all, he's a pretty (rood fel- 1 Flopp moderh portne The H with ho ■Mo.'’ ' r ] * < Ad. ii your wi{ do thel j i“ O yop iat dar », tl4y -FISI rove of hold r do a«r iy to t to te Reveille—Dpat Let the College f v/. r 1 i Dr. Hi m> on tj here." ! if you caught * lag craps with l * our fait visitors shouM come up to ^ yoti at the Grhdupting Dress Parade ; and lisf>ingly ask thO meaning of th^t “aSeful gfunt Major Goodman uld you be any*mi^e silked t 0lmn 5 * nd yo * turn red taring ,ow ’ remember weU be Ball" Mueller shoot-! to * x P'* in to htr t>,u,t •* th * *»‘ l - n * x% y^ar. j . ’ Charles frirth ia h|| m « , thod »t saylnf march? That FISH—4— Woo'fathed after taps? ^ r hat woQld '" m 100 *“•'*>’i Wt ‘ *ho\)ld have ssEed Have you noticed all those showers you think of the veracity sof the m*n y , oU F 0 ® ■evor ses-n ‘•<.op“ j >e t up with the mornipg hours, frho would slip up behiwf you and ^ getting a shave. Its a won. j Though Its raining heavily ' Whisper that Pe-tah Livin^ton once d«rful sight—s4meth)ink on the order ii t mt —for^jsefveille. glased a girl? Gbuld'you exprem I of * picture of f. jigger taken at. And jhii. your opinion in words as fluently | mi ‘lhight—therf just iWi’t la/iything> | Gosl, this weather’s ijucer, eh. Mr. Riffenburg dees to Miss Smith » lo ‘C J , > You tell 'em.—Ex. perhaps words would fail you, jind A young lady told us last week! KISH i - 1 you would give vent to your feelings that she thought Mr. Cofer should ' ANARCHIST CAUGHT ilv as graceful an asthetic dhnee as’ have s P.. D. Q. after his name — W« are sure Dr. Rathjen would trij*'Preciy* DarhoU <% «iick. But we had 4f. Or maybe you wuuld just give spplieo imt * pass at that time—“to ' West Texas is still is wild sad 4n A* u Httnt iferocioua frown] What.' escape the humiliation of being im- w f ■* Hart, at least Colonel would you think of these questions, plicated with those noisy boys' after thinh* m*- In the wild search dear reader? j Are thgy :m queer a'taps.’’ so our yarn read—which the • * or v *f™ nt ammunition Tuesday k 11 ndfy ! FISH-— r “I just left him hung tl Hi ill ^lephone as J came over v ■* ' ■Mil'. piling . squad: •Rigl i Bill? abogt There lit cry*, Ypu'll maybe.S iank pvens. I'm rigat r.FISrt^ • pbomore. don’t yoji n for vagrant ammunition . these 1 Drawing Profs? The Bull approved after twe days delibt *- i n, *fht. “Soph" Thomas, who halls aaswers are almost as hard as Dr. ation; so we coitldo't sew Proxy about ^ rom the West, was caught whh two »lph is to understand. But having the P. D, Q, degree conferred. While at h6me we heard our legisla- , ficOjialjr dii ly now, do you thufk that you as cute as Sia Hopkins his VBatter-r-ry" like a gatl- gun. i, 1 And none of them can. with Mr: PetemOn's cute cap pistols of very large caliber, weapons were confiscated and e Bi^weVre' ofriuH ^utfjeH. "'flh tended to ask yeu only one questio i, dear reader. Wv>uld ypu, if the sun had risen, get up at' twelve-thirty a. m. and parade the Military' Walk r, • 4 Chimmey.* # He just waver*- for two hours? And here’s our point, ill doe* Mr. Chapelle’s opinion Beaumont You’ve heard 'all about “Give me liberty or give me death.’’ But Dutch Bbchenburg said something worse v than that shout his beer when they took it away from him. However, Mr. Randolph soon soothed him to! in the English class. We heard awful blasphemy yesterday: same- oae said somebody else told a friend of a friend of his that he had heard that ■Mr. Gunter misspelled a word daring his freshmsit year at college. But we do not believe it any more than we believe the old gag that Dr. Blssell used to wear his hair a la* pdmpadour—when four years of ago. We can tell ^a permanent institution we see one; we saw Sis Ht>p- at Freshman Chemistry last wpek. Someone said yesterday that Prof. Thomas’s house resembled fly-paper. Hbwever. we think that it looks more like a fish hook. If you will care fully examine Hoots Williams hands afid feet you can ascertain for your- j if Mr. Bowersox practically accomp lished a miracle last week when Sc almost made “Dutch” St^olz study his physics. However, we mustn’t judge “Dutch” too harshly ps people in lovi? ' a*P said to study but little. Floppy Hartung flunked six exam-* the week after he rt»et Miss Smith. Pish Smith >4s heard to remark the pther day Mr. Hiimphreville might take off lip hat when he talked to her. w I wouldn’t you feel cheap if a voice would sound down from a fourth floor wondow:. .“Say, *•11. don’t you know when you're whipped?’*. P. S. We forgo*, somebody asked an >awfully silly question yesterday. Three hundred and fifty Kish answer- ed,\ “No.” It Was. “Will there ever be a number on the Stand Pipe high er than the ’221” . jr * THE FLEA OF THE. STAFF.' Have you a joke that> "clever. That will make us laugh forever? Send it In. Can you write p good short story. That will banish care and worry? Send it In. j 1 t’j Have-you heard S bit of news. That might perhap amgse? Send it In. i j l. / |f your subscription is not paid, lor a small deposit m*de. e rounds o Canadian {Areas'to the effect that New York State paper, is being sued because a comp, made an obituary conclude, “May he roast in Peace.” _—FISH \ , if Prexy is very anxious to do th'j Cadet Corps a colossal good and save the Freshmen of next f year, much iresome begging and still more tire some physical excruciation, ho might instal a automatic match machine on every floor on the Campus. Future Fish will rise up and call him bless ed. fish These Sophomores, if you Will no tice, aren’t such bad boys after all. Their name is about the only thing against them, except that theiir dis positions have a tendency to run to wards bayonets and belts. But we are afraid they are neglecting the reading of ther Bibles.! For We find in the fifth chapter of Kzekial. the first verse: “And thou’ O eon of Lake thee a sharp knife, yee take thee a barber’s rasor andf cause it to pass upon thy lip; then tajee the balances (the prophet evidenty for- saw the delicate instruments of the modern laboratory! to weigh the GEN1 P For a Sophor thority to] is hereby merit* anjj draw fro< 1919, ginning oi The ed to The Bt the other fore since the felt by soj gest that their ap; arose and not be other hanc a bit in lunior [by and ORD$R Nb. ISIS. 11 If ‘ii M I* dnd aid' courteous to ithou asking my a(s- jeh, Cfdet tX R. Clan: pf .901 dp- tp wit 2i . 'f n t! m rt 4 nt s ib held a banquet | “Bull* Meuller be- and stated that, of the war are still woslfi like to aeg. .•nt put a bridle on ’Prexy” at oqcg>' that a bridle would »nough£ he, on fbe that they pat lUthst PISH- IE VIEW OF HALL. 14 . ifl h.ir.* Send it in. I ^ I ; • , . ] f you have a foliar bill, nd of eats ynuSre had your fill. 1 Send 9t in. 1 1 -4 E r- >■ —♦—Fish—U hail the power of ‘ Hk* Sopho-. more’s namk, i -FISH- All IWt all fish prostrate Bring forth ■ hale of f*ii; burlap sacks. And crown them kin*rs o'f alL L . K Extract from minutes of th*. Camr pus Women’s Study Club:* '• After the Women's meeting Mrs. , Clark read an article on personal dev* ils. Seventeen were present.” % . FISH “Catfish” Goodman, ia. debating class: “You may fort;e me honorable opponents, but I ae jdowni will riad again. tack. And then hr sat down on a . ?! U 1 . If s' i ' (Apolc Ye Distant 1 That arise Where youth r i bowiarh Remembrances I feel tljs From thy d4a|bl A protest tlUTl Crumbling const Thou shoul<| i nnayi Of non-d« t - , Say, Austin Full many Say truly, ! Men, within) Ot