16
THE BATTALION.
have a lap, need guiding, ride "wheels,
■will not turn out for pedestrians, some
times foam and refuse to work; they at
tract men, are very contrary, and it al
ways takes a man to manage them.
The graduating class of one of our
prominent female schools was taking a
short trip, which was customary to each
senior class.
On entering the Mammoth Cave they
soon came to a small apartment, and
above was a very large overhanging rock.
“Young ladies,” said the guide,“under
that rock the daughter of a rich noble
man was betrothed to a prince.” “Why
did she marry there?” quickly asked one
of the girls. “Well, she had promised
her mother that she would never marry
a man on the face of the earth. But,”
solemnly, the guide said, “they do not
allow that any more.” “Why not?”
asked the crowd. “That is running mat
rimony in the ground.”
“THE BOOKKEEPER.”
There was a noted L. L. D.
Belonging to the F. F. V.,
A member of the G. O. P.,
Whose son was in U. S. Y.
He hadn’t paid a single “sou,”
I then decided what to do.
I wrote, “I hold your I. O. U.,
Will see your father P. D. Q.”
I’d sold the son some things F. 0. B.,
I wouldn’t ship them C. O. D.;
But sent a letter—viz:
A bill, a note—B,. S. Y. P.
Full quickly this U. S. V.,
For fear his irate L. L. D.
Might dock his monthly M. 0. B.,
Inclosed his check for .23.
INSPECTION.
The cadet stood in wild alarm
When he heard the command, “Inspec
tion Arms!”
The dirt in his gun was hard and' dry,
But he hoped it would pass Bob Coul
ter’s eye.
But Robert came and took up the piece,
Looked down the barrel, and spied out
the grease;
“Young man,” said he, “this game don’t
pay;
I guess you will drill on Saturday.”
As you should carry about with you a
constant and sincere sense of your own
ignorance, so you should not be afraid
nor ashamed to confess this ignorance,
by taking all proper opportunities to ask
and inquire for further information.—
Isaac Watts.
Do not read too much at a time, stop
when you are tired, and in whatever way
make some review of what you read, even
as you go along.—Edward Everett Hale.
The educated man is not the gladiator,
nor the scholar, nor the upright man
alone; but a just and well-balanced com
bination of all three. Just as the edu
cated tree is neither the large root, nor
the giant branches, nor the rich foliage,
but all of them together.—David P. Page.