..A SPICY PHILIPPINE LETTER..
Vigan, February 2, 1900.
Mr. Samuel McConnico, Bryan, Texas:
Friend Sam: The rumor has reach
ed us through the Associated Press
that your term of confinement at the
great penal institution, known as the
A. & M. College of Texas, has not
yet expired. Owing to the fact, that
one of the writers of this document
has served a short term under the su
pervision of the commandant of cadets
(better known to members of the R.
H. S. T. B. as “Bull,” we have de
cided to favor you with some litera
ture which may cause you to see the
error of your ways and repent.
Life on the firing line in Luzon has
its compensations; there are no meals
served “ a la Sbisa,” no extras walked
(except twenty or twenty-five miles
per day) — (wait until we get a ciga
rette)—and no feminine to cause us
palpitation of the heart (except the
banana woman) —. —
**=* !!!!! ??????
(there goes tattoo) whom we syste
matically rob.
If you havn’t read in the papers what
the Thirty-third has been doing you
should subsdribe for the “War Cry,”
and read up on the war news. If af
ter “smoking up” on this matter, you
are not convinced that the Thirty-third
has put the erstwhile Filipino Repub
lic on the bum good and strong, cable
us (prepaid), and we will see if we
cannot bring about a more complete
chaos.
This is a very good country for
scrapping purposes, but otherwise it
isn’t worth one of Sbisa’s Sunday din
ners. The people need the protecting
arm of Uncle Sam (not you) for years
to come, and (ooooooo
(9:15 p. m.) those unpatriotic, flag-
furling, stay-at-home anti-expansion
ists who say that they do not favor the
retention of the Philippines, should be
out here on the firing line instead of
discouraging the boys who are over here
enjoying themselves. These flag furl-
ers have done more to aid the insurrec
tion than every Mauser and Remington
which the insurgents have possessed.
It is all foolishness to say that a gov
ernment which can control forty-five
states and seventy-five millions of
people cannot put the island of Luzon,
with its population of ten millions, in
a state of law and order. We are in
favor of liberty; we want all we can
get, even if we have to take it away
from these negroes, and incidentally
they haven’t got any business with too
much liberty. They are a virile race
and should be treated as thus.
We will now proceed to tell you
some of the experiences we have had
here; of course, there are some we
can’t very well tell you for obvious
reasons.
At exactly 4 o’clock on the evening
of September 30, 1899, the transport
“Sheridan,” having on board the Thir
ty-third infantry, swung out into the
bay, mid a mighty shout from the
thousands on shore and slowly steam
ed out towards the setting sun on her
long and tedious voyage to the Orient
(another cigarette here). As we
steamed past the battleship “Iowa,”
she dipped her flag for us, and her
band played “The Stars and Stripes
Forever” and our band responded with
“I don’t care if you never come back.”