18 THE BATTALION. Alas! for the day when through false persuasion A cadet is beguiled by some ill-omened pack To create a disturbance on any occasion, For the comd’t will surely be “onto” his track. Oh! that bald-headed comd’t whose blunders are few! Be careful boys, he’s watching for you. —R. C. Watkins, ’95. Prof.—Mr. Riley, what is a soil drain? Riley—One that drains offthe soil, Thomas M. says the short hand machine in the Com mercial department is quite an improvement and he believes he could soon learn to read short hand. Scherer B. wants to know how many members the “Cos- mopoly Society” has. The following is the result of the examination in Nick Carter library: Rountree 100, Blackburn 100, Farr 99, Abbott 97, Crow 96.5, Martin 95. The Professor wishes to compliment his class on the excellent grades that were made. Be a cadet right and join one of the societies. Corporal Winkler: (looking at his stripes). “Oh! how Edna will laugh when she sees me. Hurrah for Co. Q. and day students. All old Q. lacks of being “warm” is a day studeoJiaaptain and Page, F. and Pfaunichucke are in nomination'vB Cousins: “How many square'Feet in a cubic foot?” Astin: “Don’t know.” Tracy: “Nine.” Cousins: I thought there were twenty-seven. Revised table for English money. Wiley (reciting) 4 farthing 1 drachm. 12 drachms 1 oz. 8 oz. 1 lb. Donalson wants something to encourage his mustache.